Usage data. - add maximum clean time and average metro

Monthly breakup

MonthNumber shotsSpent (total cost)Av. Methadone doseLongest break
January 200516 $1599.8445.00
February 200513 $1299.8745.00
March 200510 $1099.9145.00
April 200525 $2799.7842.94
May 200520 $2999.9040.00
June 20057 $699.9338.00
July 20059 $1099.9335.00
August 20056 $599.9433.00
September 20058 $799.9230.00
October 20057 $699.9328.00
November 200512 $1199.8825.00
December 200516 $1599.8425.50
January 200615 $2099.9325.00
February 200626 $2485.9625.00
March 200617 $2695.0025.00
April 200621 $3303.0022.52
May 200613 $1800.0022.50
June 20069 $1900.0020.00
July 200617 $2907.0017.56
August 200625 $2445.0018.17
September 200639 $3577.0019.78
October 200638 $3503.9819.29
November 200626 $2131.3220.63
December 200613 $1138.0022.04
January 200715 $1610.0021.93
February 20071 $200.0023.00
March 20070 $
April 20072 $250.0030.00
May 20070 $
June 20070 $
July 20070 $
August 20070 $
September 20070 $
October 20070 $
November 20070 $
December 20070 $
January 20080 $
February 20080 $
March 20080 $
April 20080 $
May 20080 $
June 20080 $
July 200817 $2120.0018.12
August 200812 $1480.0016.33
September 20087 $870.0018.29
October 20085 $530.0018.40
November 200815 $1762.0016.33
December 200820 $2200.0016.45
January 200923 $2308.0016.83
February 200923 $2520.0018.09
March 200926 $2400.0017.96
April 200921 $2150.0027.43
May 200923 $2339.7225.52
June 200918 $1735.0023.89
July 200923 $2458.3322.74
August 200924 $2420.0021.88
September 200920 $2055.0020.65
October 200923 $2220.0018.54
November 200921 $2020.0017.86
December 200922 $1950.0015.50
January 201025 $2449.0016.58
February 201017 $1760.0014.88
March 201027 $2330.0011.94
April 201026 $2075.008.96
May 201027 $2115.008.35
June 201029 $2590.0012.10
July 201029 $2425.0014.55
August 201024 $2070.0014.21
September 201026 $2420.0013.58
October 201033 $2620.0014.03
November 201028 $1970.0013.89
December 201034 $2870.0013.35
January 201118 $1300.0017.06
February 201113 $520.0017.77
March 201117 $1130.0017.41
April 201130 $2555.0018.30
May 201118 $1500.0016.33
June 201122 $1973.0019.27
July 201124 $2623.0017.75
August 201118 $815.0015.53
September 201123 $2245.0017.48
October 201128 $3100.0017.59
November 201124 $2115.0018.68
December 20113 $300.0023.17
January 20120 $
February 20120 $
March 20120 $
April 20120 $
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June 20120 $
July 20120 $
August 20120 $
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January 20150 $
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January 20160 $
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January 20170 $
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October 20170 $
November 20170 $
Date of UseAmount UsedCost (just mine)CommentsHours since previous use
0000-00-000.33000 grams$25Big shot. Bad day. Well, good also. Told my boss she was being 'incredibly rude', which for GF is the equivalent of ...gf! No fireworks ensued, just quiet and then ten minutes later 'I don't think I was being incredibly rude'. Wow. learning lessons still, at 40. cool. life worth living. I was ready to walk out today, more so than ever before.-306,777.80
2005-01-010.50000 grams$49.995None.306,817.33
2005-01-050.50000 grams$49.995None102.33
2005-01-070.50000 grams$49.995None41.83
2005-01-070.50000 grams$49.995None5.50
2005-01-080.50000 grams$49.995None19.83
2005-01-140.50000 grams$49.995None143.08
2005-01-140.50000 grams$49.995None6.17
2005-01-170.50000 grams$49.995None64.08
2005-01-200.50000 grams$49.995None80.10
2005-01-220.50000 grams$49.995Polack drove to Oxley, Sim saw him 300 bucks42.85
2005-01-240.50000 grams$49.995Polack again, 250 for 2 scammed! (but decent gabo)51.50
2005-01-250.50000 grams$49.995none28.50
2005-01-260.50000 grams$49.995none recorded13.00
2005-01-260.50000 grams$49.995none recorded6.00
2005-01-280.50000 grams$49.995none45.00
2005-01-280.50000 grams$49.995none recorded5.17
2005-02-010.50000 grams$49.995none recorded94.50
2005-02-030.50000 grams$49.995none recorded49.08
2005-02-030.50000 grams$49.995None recorded.3.42
2005-02-040.50000 grams$49.995None recorded16.08
2005-02-040.50000 grams$49.995none recorded8.75
2005-02-070.50000 grams$49.995none recorded72.23
2005-02-080.50000 grams$49.995None recorded21.52
2005-02-110.50000 grams$49.995none recorded62.58
2005-02-120.50000 grams$49.995DQ, pins n needles, Lil away23.83
2005-02-150.50000 grams$49.995lil using sim's dss, hafta payback + 50%...that's true love!81.25
2005-02-180.50000 grams$49.995none65.25
2005-02-180.50000 grams$49.995none6.08
2005-02-270.50000 grams$49.995none220.59
2005-03-050.50000 grams$49.995lil got visited 2nd march 05, but not in trouble, wanna stop seeing her, saw dq for this one. Sly involved, took 2 hrs, Sim p'd off138.06
2005-03-110.50000 grams$49.995drove out to forest Park, hung around a dog park for 30 minutes, eventually saw a harrassed Lil. Better qual gabo than usual.146.40
2005-03-140.50000 grams$49.995none62.45
2005-03-150.50000 grams$49.995None33.40
2005-03-160.50000 grams$49.995none14.60
2005-03-180.50000 grams$49.995none50.50
2005-03-180.50000 grams$100 The Producers6.00
2005-03-240.50000 grams$49.995none143.80
2005-03-270.50000 grams$49.995Easter Sunday73.20
2005-03-290.50000 grams$49.995First day back at work S cumz 2 twg, L rings me for 1 hr in a panic re asset seize, DQ says "cum 2 me" in sms to S43.08
2005-04-010.50000 grams$100Speak again of stopping seriously. S says she worries about "if she should be going out with me".I say I worry about superannuation. Perfect Match!71.08
2005-04-020.25000 grams$49.995none17.33
2005-04-020.25000 grams$49.995Reduce from 45 to 42.5 mg metro2.42
2005-04-020.25000 grams$49.995none7.83
2005-04-080.25000 grams$49.995none139.08
2005-04-090.25000 grams$49.995none31.43
2005-04-110.25000 grams$49.995none40.74
2005-04-120.25000 grams$49.995none29.75
2005-04-150.25000 grams$49.995Lil goes away for weekend. Spending half my life sick, recovering from gabo for 3 days then waiting for more for 4 days. This is my week65.00
2005-04-160.25000 grams$49.995none26.28
2005-04-180.25000 grams$49.995none56.20
2005-04-190.25000 grams$49.995none9.02
2005-04-190.25000 grams$49.995none6.67
2005-04-190.25000 grams$49.995GST beanz. Dad put em thru in morn not night b4 but got 1g on tic. Then another .75g paying back tic. Now half GST gone4.83
2005-04-200.50000 grams$100none17.50
2005-04-200.25000 grams$49.995none10.33
2005-04-210.50000 grams$100none13.42
2005-04-210.25000 grams$49.995final GST beanz6.95
2005-04-220.25000 grams$49.995none18.13
2005-04-220.25000 grams$49.995none recorded4.79
2005-04-230.25000 grams$49.995last of this nasty run..got tic to end it.20.88
2005-04-250.25000 grams$49.995Anzac day53.50
2005-04-290.25000 grams$49.995none87.33
2005-04-290.25000 grams$49.995none7.08
2005-04-300.25000 grams$49.995none18.83
2005-05-010.25000 grams$49.995Reduce from 42.5 to 40 mg metro23.08
2005-05-050.25000 grams$49.995none96.58
2005-05-060.50000 grams$100none23.33
2005-05-060.25000 grams$49.995none5.75
2005-05-090.25000 grams$49.995none65.50
2005-05-110.25000 grams$49.995none49.42
2005-05-130.50000 grams$100none46.83
2005-05-130.25000 grams$49.995none3.92
2005-05-190.25000 grams$49.995none140.02
2005-05-200.50000 grams$100none24.82
2005-05-210.25000 grams$49.995None recorded20.17
2005-05-230.50000 grams$100none recorded51.08
2005-05-240.50000 grams$10024.25
2005-05-240.25000 grams$49.995none6.50
2005-05-260.50000 grams$100bonus chq at work41.63
2005-05-260.50000 grams$100none recorded6.37
2005-05-270.50000 grams$100Heavy using period (only notes recorded)18.25
2005-05-270.50000 grams$100none recorded5.00
2005-05-280.50000 grams$100None noted23.75
2005-05-290.25000 grams$49.995hoo boy, wotta run!21.50
2005-06-030.25000 grams$49.995Started deducting gabo cost from S funds. No longer an added extra (13.9.05 how long did this last, ha ha ha)117.25
2005-06-070.25000 grams$49.995drove to caboolture, 6 mile creek under roadsign. Lil gone 5 days a-hunting. Punch n judy saw nuts 4 us.(turns out m gave us .3 instead of .5)102.50
2005-06-090.25000 grams$49.995Final Lil - announces withdrawal from gameplay42.45
2005-06-100.25000 grams$49.995Drove to Cbltre again! Aye Karumba!29.80
2005-06-190.25000 grams$49.995Ended up driving to Cooroy, Nuts did the crazy follow M thing. Hung out there 2 hours with s,m & d210.02
2005-06-250.25000 grams$49.995From Sly via S2, less than 2 hours considering a drive to Mt Gravatt and Sly/DQ was involved145.98
2005-06-280.25000 grams$49.995Drove past Ettamoggah to Chevallum BP, new "stuff" from Nuts, big drive for first day of new Fin Year. 90km there, 90km back.76.81
2005-07-010.50000 grams$100Def M (SMS confirms-'All OK.probably meet near N'bour or Ettamoga')72.58
2005-07-080.50000 grams$100S went to Chermside to meet D, 90 min return by buses. Fiji beckons165.50
2005-07-100.25000 grams$49.99545.27
2005-07-160.25000 grams$49.995via Sal via Sly pre Fiji. Getting ready to go overseas to see my sister's wedding.143.89
2005-07-170.25000 grams$49.995Drove to Yandina turnoff,s aw M, got extra metro for journey22.16
2005-07-180.25000 grams$49.995Sal-Sly-world fallin apart.30.46
2005-07-190.25000 grams$49.995(none recorded)17.00
2005-07-210.25000 grams$49.995In Fiji, silly silly51.33
2005-07-260.25000 grams$49.995Back from Fiji, silly silly silly, only back 2 hrs121.50
2005-08-050.25000 grams$49.995With Sal to meet Sly at Pimpana Mobil petrol station. Insane. Off to Sigur Ros. Sleepy, wasted tickets. Tarnation!241.67
2005-08-130.25000 grams$49.995First time with M&D since Fiji return. Def seems weaker than Sly's, maybe a good thing.185.20
2005-08-160.17000 grams$49.995Weird. Feeling hung out post-nuts gabo, saw Sal lunchtime, going crazy waiting. $85 pack.74.03
2005-08-190.25000 grams$49.995Little Birdy, all my bidding to score, S didn't mention it, saw Sal, drove to Mrka, saw fat goonah who saw anotehr dude, all insanity. Fat goonah put her daughter on the street when she was 12 (HAWK FOR A FAWK), turned out Lil Birdy postponed tioll Monday due to illness.79.85
2005-08-240.14000 grams$49.995Sal/Sly, a burn. No more talking to her. No need for details, a burn's a burn.$350 gone119.25
2005-08-270.25000 grams$49.995Jet/Michelle met @their place, so simple compared 2 S&S65.00
2005-09-090.25000 grams$49.995Jet/Michelle Kedron, pigs went thru Jet at back of hock shop315.76
2005-09-130.14000 grams$49.995J-frog. How stupid could I be. Probably got around a q for the price of a half ($200)99.49
2005-09-160.25000 grams$49.995M&D (which equals J&M). 6 mile creek pickup. Big n fluffy but not so effective. Lacked stress of J-frog. S stressed at sleepiness on return69.92
2005-09-190.25000 grams$49.995Busy@work couldn't get away 4 metro till 130. cash in account for tax payment. Decided on way to chem that I'd try j-frog. All happened v fast. Good qual, from T in twg.66.50
2005-09-220.25000 grams$49.995Stupid.Back2empty flat from Adelaide this morn. Saw Jfrog just post work n smashed me to bits. T in TWG again. Offered intro, said no. V DANGEROUS!!!76.55
2005-09-230.25000 grams$49.995More stupidity. S back from nth. Genuinely didn't wanna do it, S genuinely wanted me to do the "biz". Ergo proctor hoc, I used.19.28
2005-09-250.25000 grams$49.995Extra stupidity. Pushed by Jfrog, he rang, I ignored, he rang again, I ans, S1 keen, I angry, ended up doing. Big surprise!48.38
2005-09-300.25000 grams$49.995S paid 4 40% of the 250, nice, ended up in streets of back TWG, Bent St(from Jfrog).2 hours from phone call to score. Now we watch sleepily the 2004 film"Don't say a word" Brittany Murphy etc etc.126.05
2005-10-040.25000 grams$49.995My stupid idea, went TWG with Jfrog, gave him 20%. Prepping for Fashion Week95.62
2005-10-070.25000 grams$49.995Payday. Stupid, stoned all arvo @ wk, missed metro, can't get more till Monday maybe.66.28
2005-10-140.25000 grams$49.995Payday. Had small illness Thurs & Fri, thought maybe metro reduction, but that was 1st of mth not now. Saw Jman who saw WestEnd M, 3 hrs all up, waste of my Fri night.175.68
2005-10-220.25000 grams$49.995Day after payday. Woke feeling great, perhaps a little too great. Didn't want an iced coffee as I was already hyperactive. Then sneezed a couple of times, , and S & I felt shiteful, so (on S's proposition) I scored w/Jman off M's runner, B183.15
2005-10-260.25000 grams$49.995Had a cold. Blew my tax money. What's the government done for me lately? Huh?100.90
2005-10-280.25000 grams$49.995Payday.Still with a cold. Money I can't afford. Stuff wears off quick. Sly at meeting spot.49.27
2005-10-290.25000 grams$49.995More insanity. Leadup to RAQ perhaps? Met DQ at site, world is small place when scoring.20.78
2005-11-050.25000 grams$49.995At least not payday, S back from fash awards, me been depressed for days169.05
2005-11-070.25000 grams$49.995Had the beans, easy access, no real reason other than "it feels good". No business S or I enter into will succeed whilst we are into gabo as any profits will go intravenously, when they should be reinvested into the business we are trying to nurture.49.61
2005-11-080.25000 grams$49.995S' payday, I had (craftily?) made her feel guilty in the early morn for never paying so she paid tonight Logic? Now she has no funds for a fortnight, 'less I lend her some.23.96
2005-11-110.25000 grams$49.995Saw B Ship-In, spent 15 minutes looking for him using his cryptic 5 second msgs. He called 20 minutes after I left saying I'd shorted him $100. Went back down to area and spent 20 minutes searching for $100 on ground amongst late night Southbank goers. Found nil, gave him $50, S pissed at me, she no got paid so angry at me for not having enuff cash 4 her.71.95
2005-11-140.25000 grams$49.995Seems anytime I have more than $200 I will spend it on gabo. Even without S's repetitive prompting (which she supplied on cue as expected) I imagine I would have scored tonight, because I took out $350 cash at lunch, what else for????73.59
2005-11-150.25000 grams$49.995Things bad when u score n forget to note the time. Blatted two days running, it's a case of "when I have the cash I will score". This is a function of the ease of scoring - for the past year it's been a hassle so I was able to have cash and not score. Not no more.23.36
2005-11-180.20000 grams$49.995"My man" was finishing up, I got all he had left, 4 points. This is 80 per cent of usual size. Still got pins n needles.71.52
2005-11-190.20000 grams$49.995Thru Jet, waited a while, M back 2 flat, S's bday, of course no money to spend on presents as all goes on gabo! Saw Little Fish later on that night.19.85
2005-11-220.25000 grams$49.995Whilst waiting for "the man", not one not two buty three others turned up, and two of them knew me. Benny, outta jail since Dec 04, huge grin on face. S was there too and said hi to him. Another girl, unsure of her name was there and knew me. She said she had bipolar and had been busted often recently for a variety of charges.75.47
2005-11-250.25000 grams$49.995Deleted all ph numbers from phone and PC. S found an friend's no. on a ph bill who knew Bman's no. Ah well, tried I did.73.51
2005-11-270.12500 grams$49.995Bit of a cold - right nostril sinused up, yuck yuck. Debtaed scoring last night for hours, only had enough for a q, slept on it and woke ready to go! Big surprise.39.76
2005-11-280.25000 grams$49.995Felt off-colour all day, "nothing else to do" says S. Saw L today at lunch30.69
2005-12-020.25000 grams$49.995S&I fought.I gave notice of desiring not to score yesterday. Normally we score on Friday as it's payday for me. S very persistent, which I expected. Ended up scoring by S promising to repay on Tues, plus I intro'd her to BMan so she can ring him herself. Van nguyen executed this morn.97.05
2005-12-030.25000 grams$49.995As usual, I use on Fri, I use on Sat. Jfrog rang and offered me beans, he needed a suit for sibling's wedding. Now I am totally broke and owe beanz to J17.02
2005-12-060.12500 grams$49.995Lotsa waiting, couldn't get tick even for 2 days, this off a man with a bag of 30 q's in his hand, Adine exBUMS called 2nite, v sus.80.88
2005-12-090.37500 grams$49.995I am v pi%%$$ed off.I left my mobile telephone at home this morn, and this little omission has caused a cavalcade of shite. In short, Bman told me to meet him in carpark X in 10 minutes. After 40 minutes waiting in carpark X, out strolls Bman with un unknown female on his arm. He waled past my car (one of 3 in an 50 car lot). He gets in car and takes off. My lower jaw drops. i watch the car in case he is doing a block but no. With him went my chance of opiated endorphine receptor satisfaction. Which is what the whole thing's about, fundamentally. I walk/dash to nearest public phone. 68.78
2005-12-100.12500 grams$49.995Hadta buy some done, up at Ninderry looking after S's sis' house, went to buy 'done and seller was on way to score so ended up doing that too..big escape from gabo, not.23.35
2005-12-130.25000 grams$49.995M of M&D range me mid arvo to see ifi t was the "real B answering his phone. What with all B's cop trouble M was concerned that the pigs were trying to trap consumers. But no. As a result (well I guess I woulda anyway) I arranged shopping post work.72.72
2005-12-140.25000 grams$49.995McRob Christmas party, had 2 vals and 3 bourbons and came out wanting to score. Stupid. It wasn't bad or anything, actually enjoyed it. Met a young user called Emily 2nite whilst awaiting Bman27.34
2005-12-160.25000 grams$49.995Office XMAS party 2nite. Using way too much. What else 2 say? When u use 20 minutes b4 the party, and u know using will make u a freak at the party yet do it nonetheless, you're in trouble.44.50
2005-12-170.25000 grams$49.995Sat arvo, brief thunderstorm. Nearly Christmas, power and gas about to be cut off, and I spend last beans on gabo. Problems?19.92
2005-12-200.12500 grams$49.995Moanzo grumpy plus, seemed76.36
2005-12-220.22500 grams$49.995Over the Bman, S refuses 2 see him, M&D rang and said theyhad new person, better, cheaper. Had 2 drive to Narangba48.35
2005-12-230.12500 grams$49.995Last wk day pre Xmas. Hot outside. No pressie shopping done yet, can't blow it all on gabo. Wk says raise next wk. That's their way of saying no Christmas bonus like last year!21.07
2005-12-240.25000 grams$49.995Chrissymuss Eve. Spent nigh on two hours awaiting gabo after cal lnumber One. But Christmas Eve is traditionally crap for all shopping. Gabo was crap quality also.20.15
2005-12-250.21250 grams$49.995Christmas! S's present money for her shoes (shop was shut). Norty! Had it delivered by friends.28.54
2005-12-300.25000 grams$49.995First decent break in two months or so (terrible!). Drove to past Burpengary. Year ending, still scoring. Ho hum120.79
2005-12-310.25000 grams$49.995Spending last of my (lessened by a 3 day week) pay packet. Hot weather, end of year, no plans for tonight. General inability to plan more than a day ahead.20.74
2006-01-010.12500 grams$49.995Headed up North Coast, S visits little niece T, does the doting aunty down pat, even if they call her the "crazy aunt". Many requests as to when I get the new car, I bite tongue to avoid spilling bean-infested truth.27.02
2006-01-020.18750 grams$49.995Gave 1.5 hours notice of intent to score, yet it still took from 5:30 to 9:30 to score. I have used every day this year. "Painfully aggravating" says Ms. S I am 34 going on 35 yet I still spend my evenings lurking in an unlit CBA carpark, awaiting a young man who will sell me (at minimum 100% markup) a quarter of a gram of gabo. Fun. My life. Is not.28.41
2006-01-030.12500 grams$49.995Brighton Tce. Deja vu of me scoring at 45. what goes on?23.84
2006-01-060.25000 grams$49.995Brighton Tce again. First to Buranda, but too hot he says to BT it is. Crazy. Would've done it days ago but today is payday and I only worked 4 days due to New Years Day. Ripping The Piano from Mercs coll. Staying at hers a few days.68.31
2006-01-070.25000 grams$49.995Gloopy gluggy gear. s/w S night b4 agreed not to talk of gabo till after our metro. S held off on metro, spoke of gabo 1130. I refused to see Bman, S had to organise and see. V angry, still angry. Talks of moving out via oblique references i never do shit for her, she always does stuff for me....18.94
2006-01-130.25000 grams$49.995Waiting waiting waiting. S' turn. She says, and I quote, "Nothing". With a bit of a sigh, I think, but S hotly disputes my contention. So just the facts. 2.5 hours from first phone call to score. Told 45 minutes, which keeps you waiting. If you were told it's 2.5 hour wait you may shop[ elsewhere, but if you keep being told 45 then 30 then 30 minutes you stick around. Marketing.152.01
2006-01-140.25000 grams$49.995More waiting. S sees him once again. I am in one of my "very over this scene" moods and trying to capitalise on it. Forcing S to do the dirty side - seeing B - is tough but necessary. If she wants to score she will hopefully get fed up with the Bman shite. She got angry at BMan today, it helps scoring none but maybe it'll deter her from future scoring.21.47
2006-01-170.50000 grams$100S pays for, temporarily at least. This put her in a foul mood as all her funds have gone for the moment. Not worth i.69.70
2006-01-200.65000 grams$125Didn't havye a half, only "one of his shots", which was .65. Pay 240, he sas. I had 250 - "Do you have change" - "Sure...oh no sorry (after handover of funds). I cannot get tick off him, but he can get tick off me...Loser am I. Pares OS, visiting grandchild, J. Now I go to their house to house sit for 30 days. No more little flat, no more neighbours peering in 4 times a day.74.87
2006-01-230.50000 grams$100Aircon money bounced back, has been supplied wrong account number. In my book this comes under "manna from heaven" so I sent around two-thirds to the corrected account number and took the rest out in cash. "Gabo gabo hey", as The Ramones say.71.26
2006-01-270.50000 grams$100First arvo shot, one of two. S purchased a g in one go92.66
2006-01-270.50000 grams$100Second and biggie! Off to pares. First twice in a day shot in a while. Ain't life grand.4.07
2006-01-280.12500 grams$25Sleeping alone at pares, fighting, depressed.25.46
2006-01-290.25000 grams$50Less depressed, but last of beans. Saved no money for food, for another week. Contemplating a return to business, S not too negative for a change about this lifestyle change17.00
2006-01-310.50000 grams$100S supplies, she seems depressed, Dr Who on telly, no beanz ho hum. Came home for first time in 3 days, S thinks I angry, but no, just sad. Anyway, this is not the forum for such thoughts52.90
2006-02-030.50000 grams$100My birthday, hip hip hooray! Nothing like a blatta gabo to start off a night of snoozing! Plans to go for a drink then a movie post blat, but once blatted, no more action. C'est la vie!72.08
2006-02-050.31250 grams$62.5Rcvd a lecture from "the man", as I had asked for 125 on the 'phone then turned up with only 100. The sheer nerve of me, asking for (AUS)25 dollars tick! I stared off into the distance as he delivered his soliloquy, then I handed him 100 and he handed me a 125 pack. Angry I was, at the berating in front of his cohorts. Why this should upset me is unclear as the cohorts are complete strangers to me. Being reduced to "just another junkie" was the sting, I guess. As much as I try to empathise with the down-trodden junkie, sadly it rankles me when I am treated like "one of them". As I said43.57
2006-02-070.25000 grams$100Bman phone off all day, got onto his man, M, after a few calls. Seems nice enough, a 5 minute wait turned into 50 minutes, but that's the biz I guess.55.57
2006-02-090.12500 grams$49.995M for the 2nd time, small but powerful. Not the niceness of Bman, and also a bumbler but a little higher up I guess.46.56
2006-02-100.50000 grams$100Super-stress. I had forgotten the natural and nasty chemicals produced by a body in fear of arrest. Found my self driving for a dodge-merchant, in the middle of an Annerley crime blitz. Cops doing laps, twas hard not to think it was all aimed at us23.21
2006-02-110.12500 grams$19Wakeup with gabo. Thinking that I will be strong enuff tosay no, but of course not. I guess my true core-self knew the truth.13.28
2006-02-110.06000 grams$9Moanz off to town with mumsy. I continue this 8ball madness, trying to keep it small..2.40
2006-02-110.20000 grams$30Weekend of madness. Nil else to say. Going through an eightball for no reason other than going through one.5.43
2006-02-110.20000 grams$30Madness4.00
2006-02-120.20000 grams$30Madness14.50
2006-02-120.20000 grams$30Madness3.50
2006-02-120.20000 grams$30Madness5.00
2006-02-130.20000 grams$30Madness, ending up12.33
2006-02-130.12500 grams$15from sale stash, took a bit of edge off, why did I get myself into this11.00
2006-02-140.17500 grams$22.5Mixing last bits and pieces12.92
2006-02-140.12500 grams$49.995Said we wouldn't but did anyway, bought a q after to 8ball ran out. Surprise surprise. Afford this can we? As Yoda says No13.25
2006-02-160.25000 grams$49.995First weak shot in a while, leaves one "tonguing" for more. Ah well. Payday 2moro, try 2 avoid last week's eightball madness.46.38
2006-02-170.25000 grams$49.995Hoping this'll be the last one before a bit of a break. Need to pay ills, need to get straight etc. See what happens23.95
2006-02-180.25000 grams$50Dude starts loading stuff in my car, I point out that S is standing by and he can't assume he's getting a lift. Last night I ended up driving him from deadshit to deadshit, waiting to get busted at each stop. And I was the scorer, not the dealer16.37
2006-02-180.25000 grams$50Twice in one day, shouldn't have bought just a q, it does nil these days except frustrates us both6.99
2006-02-190.25000 grams$40Brekky at Spoon, feeling off-colour, spur of the moment, now both broke for a week. Again.18.89
2006-02-230.25000 grams$50Good break, went to Mater 2day for pre-op, took a few hours, they gave lots of simple to understand positive info.101.70
2006-02-240.50000 grams$100How much stress can one pack into waiting to score? Nearly got towed. Phone flat. Went to wrong spot n waited 20 minutes, then walked to pub phone n got parked in, office owners rang tow company, yadda yadda yadda. Oi vei!24.10
2006-02-250.25000 grams$45Spent money on bills so i wouldn't be able to do this, yet still did, now no groceries...17.56
2006-02-270.25000 grams$50S drank with old friend S2 last night. This reminded her that her life is a wasting. She became a lil depressed. Tis a great problem, wasting a lives. It's not hwat you expect, I guess, when you start using. I expected a quick and romantic (ha!) death. But each of us has our imagined path that motivates us to not drive off the road into a tree.53.68
2006-02-280.25000 grams$50Too little too often, I say. I shoulda held my century from last night n gotten on to something worthwhile today.25.03
2006-03-010.25000 grams$47.5S saved some beanz from dole, another day-in-a-row pissweak shot that does nil but keeps me hanging on.24.53
2006-03-020.25000 grams$100Last night, silent night, angels bright In for th ebig chop chop in the morning. Maybe I'll be able to breathe through my nose after that Apparently it's the latest thing, this nose breathing. Us mouth breathers are so 1970s I can't wait!24.01
2006-03-030.50000 grams$100Coming out of a general anaesthetic, into shock and confusion. S standing by with sweet Gabo.16.04
2006-03-040.50000 grams$100Sleepy dealer. Rung at 9am, scored at 230pm. Ended up walking from hospital as all beanz spent on gear. Woozy27.00
2006-03-100.40000 grams$80Waited 30 minutes after being told to be there in 5 minutes. "Woo hoo" says S post-shot. She kisses my ear to make up for too loudly "Woo Hoo"-ing said orifice. Now she sings to the ads on TV and gives me half a Twix. That's right kids, emotions are back on tap at 182. It's been less than a week since our last shot, but heavy usage over a long time seems to make your emotions function only when stoned...Whether that's a defence mechanism by gabo to make u keep using, or just a usual body response to only experience emotions when the body is happy (gabo-ed/stoned)148.36
2006-03-110.50000 grams$100Strength of mind gained from op washed away from one use. Woke up this morning, fight with S as I drop her in town, off to pares to work on whipper snipper, then off to score. Ended up driving Doc to Sunnybank to shop, putting myself at risk of imprisonment for what?18.34
2006-03-120.25000 grams$45Drove out to Runcorn to see him, had to scratch a fat girl's back, not a fun experience for half a q. Grocery money gone. I dropped S off to do grocery shopping (she insisted she do it alone) and came back 40 minutes later she had done none but was keen to score....24.19
2006-03-140.37500 grams$75Home delivered, got a lecture on not speaking on phone, crap quality, idiot driver said "It's good tote mate"what??? I mean I know it's a crazy industry but who needs knobs like these.55.77
2006-03-170.50000 grams$100Bigtime stuffaround. First called 530pm, it took nearly 4 hours to get it in my hot lil hand. At one stage we were following his car around block after blovk of local suburban monotony, as he searched for a car that held his scales. Ten minutes of fruitless driving returned us to where we started from, and there waited the hunted car with driver and scales. All in all v frustrating.71.82
2006-03-180.50000 grams$100Less stuffing around. I decided to get this completely on my own. I had dropped S off at Paddo to do study with "this guy" or "Sky", not sure which one (ha ha ha) and straight away, Boom!, on my own, what can I do? Score! Yes, what an imagination I have. The whole world at my feet, health, pretty woman, car, home, and what do i want? Needle in my arm please sir if u don't mind...Ah well, figur14.95
2006-03-230.37500 grams$75Super quick, new dude T, unfortunately the gabo was crud. Here I sist 2 hrs later and not a tickle126.41
2006-03-240.50000 grams$100Improvement in quality, perhaps, great delivery (but it is only the second time I've seen the new lad, usually things go downhill rather rapidly from this point on. I am preparing myself to be disappointed!) Off to the (c(sh)it(t)y to get some towel. Apparently these will improve the quality of our lives no end.24.06
2006-03-250.50000 grams$100Bit of waiting, around An hour, at Oxley. This cycle is driving me loopy. I get paid (really) well Friday afternoon. By Saturday afternoon I am sitting in a carpark ready to give the last of my money to a dealer. No money left for food, clothes, health etc. Then anothe rweek clicks through. I get slowly better, my body recovers from the punctures, and I am starting to feel human by next payday19.58
2006-03-280.50000 grams$100Spent 30 minutes in a garage waiting to have salvation handed through a drainhole in the floor above. "Just like in the movies". But without the glamour (or the cool soundtrack in the background, S says). T was off getting tattoos.77.23
2006-03-290.25000 grams$0Tic, for the first time in ages found $20 whilst washing a shirt, cashed a val script, got some I crm, went halves in a kebab, then J(M's girlfriend) rang wanting a q, and I cashed in all my 'favours' and got a crudworthy q on tic.25.51
2006-03-300.25000 grams$45utter crud. Moan moans, vals only 2mg, tickity tock off dealers, all is shite. Looking forward to feeling even more shiteful when they run out. Dealer says the stuff is crap, and he was right21.90
2006-03-310.40000 grams$803rd night in a row I find him on the pokies. Sad or scary? At least I know my hard earned cash is going to a good cause not. I guess it's a kind of tax - I earn my money, give it to a dealer who gambles it and loses 13%, which the government keeps. I must remember to explain this to the tax office.23.02
2006-04-010.50000 grams$100Ah yes, April Fools Day. And I am the fool, yes sirree, paid for 75% of the half, got 50%. Why so? Lerv, I believe. Or something. Anyways, for her 25% contrib, she had to "do all the work". i.e. go into the pokies room where I had gone the last three evenings, and extract one dealer for a swapsy outside. Why not inside? "Oh, coz, like, there's no good spot to do it (a deal) at all" - S re18.33
2006-04-020.25000 grams$40My stupidity. Ten percent metro reduction, and I felt it, especially after waxing my car. Came upstairs flushing hot and cold, and mentioned gabo. Damage done, all we had was $80, but got a q for that, now utterly broke and I still feel bad. Gabo was sugar plus.31.87
2006-04-030.50000 grams$100Wacol. Shit, I'm stilll in Wacol. Everytime I'm back in Highgate Hill I want to be back in Wacol, and everytime well, you get the picture. Waiting all day for funds transfers then zipping off to dealers who've had their licence suspended. Yet he turns up in a car? I guess it's about distance, not a binary YES/NO decision. Aaagh. GST beanz buring up in my metabolism.26.29
2006-04-040.50000 grams$100Oi! raining. waiting in the wrong street, back and forth, madness, gst funds blowing away blat by blat. off to cook my mucous delivery system - Asparagus Spaghetti.20.59
2006-04-050.37500 grams$75Awake. Heading to Melb this arvo.12.00
2006-04-050.25000 grams$50Melbourne goodies consumed early. No willpower I guess3.07
2006-04-060.37500 grams$75Back from Melbourne. S had beanz from work, I had 100, so we got the 100 + 70 for 150 deal.35.94
2006-04-070.50000 grams$100Tried something different. Three hours after I had it, I was out looking for more from a different source. That says it all in regards to strength21.46
2006-04-070.41667 grams$83.5Doing it hard, feeling v crusty on lower dose. Been using 10? Days straight. Been 2 melb n back, gabo crap n always feeling sick. Sleep in 2moro3.60
2006-04-080.33330 grams$66.5Woke up with it from previous night10.56
2006-04-080.50000 grams$100S's Austudy came in oily for some reason, who knows, but it meant a second shot for the day. Jolly good. T dragged his fet a little.5.52
2006-04-090.55000 grams$110Drove doc to stretton, saw brett n co out there, sad sad life24.56
2006-04-100.34000 grams$66.5Aaah, continuing this sad cycle, everytime we think it's our last lot of money, we wait 24 hours, get sick, and turn an essential spendinto a non-essential by dint of will27.17
2006-04-110.12500 grams$50S away, wrist sprained/fractured after a non-comedic version of the chair-pull-away routine. I went to make a call, dialled the number, then sat on my chair, but S had requisitioned it for wardrobe inspection. Oi! Not as hard to bang up as I expected. LH damaged24.59
2006-04-130.55000 grams$110The return of the fabulous Ms S required a special greeting present. Luckily Ms Romania 1959 was back on the scene and her product was decent. A happy convergence of events.48.08
2006-04-140.25000 grams$50S saw doc, M&D had to raise funds and S not keen to wait. With all my extra metro from last few days I was fine but impatience won and we got stuff about half the strength of yesterdays. I waited in car for an hour as she waited next to him as he found a vein.18.18
2006-04-140.25000 grams$50Up to the double BPs, a drive of 100kms, just for a quarter. Why? Coz it's better than the local product.7.51
2006-04-150.25000 grams$50Brakes froze on MR2, M drove from Cooroy to fix for me, and bring a q. Ta mate.20.55
2006-04-210.50000 grams$100Drove 35k nth - worth it? Hmmm I guess, better than Docs. But brakes had locked twice in last week, so I was a littler wary of a 70k drive. All worked out. I am glad the brakes locked as my friend M was able to teach me how to bleed them (he drove down from up north to do this), and now I have more confidence with my car.144.99
2006-04-220.50000 grams$100Once again, long drive to Redclifee. Brakes locked on at 19km, alone so all I could do was open and relieve pressure. Not sure if air got into line. When met M&D, M pumped them through 3 times. All becoming a bit of a chore, S bleeding & unhappy (hence bleeding unhappy)18.38
2006-04-280.50000 grams$100S' idea, one week between, then two. This is week One. "Get used to having it just once a week first, then start having it once a fortnight". That may take a few weeks to get used to having it just once a week she says, covering her ass for next Friday.150.07
2006-05-040.25000 grams$50Got money on the long weekend, put beanz in friend's account on Tuesday, it turned up there Wed morning, he wasn't able to do anything that day, today he was, and so, after a 10 hour day, I drove (with an unhappy S) 70 kilometres to Burpengary and back. Good gear though, well worth the drive after such a long break.145.33
2006-05-050.50000 grams$100Not such a big drive today, just to the Entertainment Centre, another place I've never been...S says this stuff is no good, does nothing, I disagree.22.12
2006-05-060.50000 grams$100M&D already shopped, mumbler not the most appealing choice so we went back to the Roms. Personally I view this as a failure. Although we will get the same amount at a cheaper price, the inconvenience of driving to Redcliffe everytime I want to score is now gone. If I want to score I just make a phone call and they come to me. Even if I'm at work. No waiting, no muss, no fuss. This makes scoring20.17
2006-05-120.25000 grams$50Oi vei. S & I catfighting, started during my 7am-6pm day 3 of training. I accused S of sending me an SMS by mistake, a nice SMS. It did not sound the way she speaks to me, hence my doubts. Who knows what truth is.148.66
2006-05-130.25000 grams$50Used leftovers from night b4, first time I have seen L in person. Nothing has changed on her front12.00
2006-05-150.12500 grams$60Monday. Still on the couch, near a week on. Sleep in the bed with her only if I'm stoned. It all means something I am sure, but in th echaos of life, attributing meaning to my actions seems more and more absurd. S is good.53.94
2006-05-150.12500 grams$40Coupla hours later, in a toliet at work, during intensive training. A minute later and I'm back in the class with Sharyn staring into my cancelled eyes. No meaning.2.08
2006-05-200.50000 grams$110Did nothing on payday, mainly due to S&I fighting and lack of a good dealer. But now it's Sat and a long time ahead of us. Watched Breakfast at Tiffanys, then off to Cherm to score off the replacement Rom. I don't know their name, and I don't really care, as M&D do all the dirty work.117.85
2006-05-200.25000 grams$35The new Rom only does 3/4g packs, to keep another client "happy", so no more one off quarters, Friday halfweights, it's just3/4 ornothing if I'm to go through the new Rom. I guess there's always mumbling Mick and the 3 hour wait, plus I hear it's quite weak and has new added floaties that never dissolve, no matter how much heat you add. Choices choices.9.44
2006-05-260.25000 grams$96.66Used this by myself as I picked it up at the start of the Bruce Highway. Then off to the doc for a new metro script for June, plus a val script.138.82
2006-05-260.50000 grams$77.336This was what was left of the .75 packet, S had roughly 60%, me 40%. Later there were gabo tears but the wall is still there.2.00
2006-05-270.50000 grams$110I did not plan this really, expecting to use only once this payday. However, M&D told me they were getting an 8ball so I could get a half instead of the usual 3/4 - without thinking it over too much I accepted, and now I am stoned.17.49
2006-05-300.50000 grams$100Using on a Tuesday - why not? Had cash from a PC repair job, didn't think I'd be able to get anything as dealers OS and their stand in had only certain sizes, eg .75, but tried and succeeded.78.39
2006-06-020.50000 grams$97Supersad night, S a little drunk, announced again we were only friends. (continued in next shot)71.09
2006-06-020.12500 grams$48(continued) Me being a fool announced she is more than that to me.0.69
2006-06-030.50000 grams$110This morning I was moving out, now I am stoned and in love as usual.. A woman ran into the back of Mr2 on the way out east. "I thought you were going to take that corner" she accused. I had stopped whilst cornering and been run into seconds later by Ms schoolteacher.19.50
2006-06-090.50000 grams$110Ho hum. S ranted and railed last night for gabo, then I wrote a Word doc outlining my feelings and all went quiet till near bedtime. Then the gabo supplier rang and the whole thing started again ten times as intense. Scored, which makes me sadhappy. I know I always wanted to score. Thought I could fight it on my own.147.79
2006-06-130.50000 grams$110Life unravelling. Calculated that I can get myself a halfweight every day as long as my job lasts. The self-destructive urge is very strong and I do not know if it is resistable. I do not mean self-destructive as in suicide, but as in "throw away all I have built".95.85
2006-06-160.75000 grams$145I guess I had mine over 2 shots - 80% then 20% of .375. Crud gear, lucky I had extra I guess. One user says when this gear smells of vinegar he knows it will be a good shot.The batch is not mixed very well, and is high in opiates in some spots, low in others.72.11
2006-06-180.50000 grams$110Out at Nudgee Beach. Beanz then gabo - usually I don't wait as I pick up post work. Glad I'm distanced a little from this sad game.42.94
2006-06-190.25000 grams$110Heavy work day. Then a 90 km drive to past Caboolture to pickup and back again. Tell S she's "the best of the best" and she tells me "no more of that talk". Chicks huh?29.86
2006-06-230.50000 grams$110S's idea to score. I said 'I don't want to score, but I will give you the cash to score.". In the end I scored, as M delivered to north of Burpengary. I made S come along, of which she was not happy. My reason behind forcing her to accompany was that it would show her the downside of scoring. At present she puts in no cash, doesn't have to associate with any junkies, and she has the dope deli96.36
2006-07-010.50000 grams$110S moving out still, on hols and doing nothing to go but talking about it. I scored after S desired to do so last night.184.71
2006-07-040.50000 grams$120OI! Sick, some kind of fevery cold, aching body. Work had a server problem, spent 30 mins on phone till it went flat. Same time BCC guys chasing me and M around Boondall due to them being suss. Cops seen at one stage also. Too old for this, just wanted relief from illness.69.74
2006-07-050.25000 grams$75Seeing if I can stay out of it till she's gone - not so practical considering there are 2 mouths to feed. Had to drive over 100 kilometres with a cold for a cruddy halfweight32.35
2006-07-070.50000 grams$100Week of sickness, week of weakness.48.04
2006-07-080.12500 grams$48.5Woke up early, S off to dentist,took rest of 3qs12.00
2006-07-150.25000 grams$100Mr nameless Rom let down by suppliers. So much for JIT inventory control. Homebake, as they say. All is sad. Mixed in white vinegar, pH cancelled out by alkaline gabo I hope.183.03
2006-07-170.25000 grams$100The crud. No vinegar needed.45.02
2006-07-180.25000 grams$100An hour waiting for him to come down stairs, "Just a minute away" whenever I rang. All worked out in the end, M is not such a bad dude.(I quit and drove home eventually, only to be turned around as I stepped into my lift. He was waiting for me, and I drove him to Paddington)25.50
2006-07-210.06250 grams$125Freshly cooked, add vinegar, very nice. Four to five times the price of street.69.99
2006-07-220.25000 grams$100Back to the crud again, a big difference. S & I divide and absorb. Life continues.M down from north, bump into him at East Bris.21.05
2006-07-230.25000 grams$75Supercrud! M had some cop trouble, I went out to Hol Pk West to pick up mumbler, D came over, and when I returned after dropping mumbler home, the flat was in superstress mode. The gear had set solid in seconds of prepping, only D had got hers in, M was cursing and S was looking abashed. All worked out, but a bit scary as to what we were putting in our systems.27.44
2006-07-270.05000 grams$100homecooked. My real last night (with S) 2moro. Spent 2 hrs watching mumbler dig for a vein, wouldn't hand over gear that he hadn't tested (is he being decent or a bastard). I have 2 b at work at 715 in morning79.25
2006-07-280.05000 grams$0Meant to be going 2 a motel 2nite. M brings cooked dinenr to work to split up. D goes off at him as she's stuck 2 hrs north while he sits in a car in Bris saying 'I have to break it up in liquid coz it's too small to split by eye. D knows this'll mean M is having some right now, and she has to wait. Also, she is working for all this.35.48
2006-07-280.01250 grams$50Saved me a big one, relented after S rings, I ring her back and offer her half. Such a nice guy I am.5.12
2006-07-290.10000 grams$100Sharing, cooked stuff was too acidic this time, had to add sodium carbonate. This made the morph precipitate out immediately, so vinegar to return tp pH normal. Morph rush, but two hours later I feel straight18.25
2006-07-310.05000 grams$100Best cook yet. Came in little anal insertion flip top (JOKING). Bitta vinegar, falling alseep at work. No thoughts of S48.12
2006-07-310.05000 grams$100More, after coworkers had left, fell asleep at desk. This is life?5.28
2006-08-040.05000 grams$40First night back in flat. Spent evening awaiting a call, then a coupla hours in a basement carpark awaiting man to walk down from his flat and deliver it.80.65
2006-08-040.25000 grams$50Second night alone in flat. S was just over, pretty definite on us never getting back together.19.62
2006-08-050.22000 grams$45Sat arvo b4 leaving for Nth Arm16.93
2006-08-050.15500 grams$30Sat night up Nth Arm. I guess I took this up.4.00
2006-08-060.25000 grams$100What an effort. Rang Mumble at 10am from Yandina to organise. Arrive Bris 4pm. Mumble then rang dealer, dealer didn't want to drive from Gold Coast to Bris for only a gram, so we had to choose between the prev. night's crud and trying to talk this pretend Rom into heading to Brisberg,25.70
2006-08-070.25000 grams$50Hung out with M for a few more hours, helped him clean a little, blood, chemicals, ammonia. Learnt a little. Kissed S3.50
2006-08-090.05000 grams$100Called by M, unexpectedly. Was just starting to feel good about life. But this was a good batch, so I am told, so I dropped all at work, cashed in beanz for my internet direct debit, and zipped to east bris. Now I'm stoned and feeling mentally rotten.59.93
2006-08-110.02632 grams$41.5Last part had, shared with S. Went straight from work to seeit created before my very eyes..57.42
2006-08-110.03000 grams$0Free tester. Had to spend 4 -5 hours in a small roomwith the guy to get it worth it, I don't know. He's lovely, but fuckd up.0.75
2006-08-110.03684 grams$117First bought part0.00
2006-08-130.50000 grams$100Waited for bake, till midnight, then he tells me he hadn't started, so sold me crud that did next to nothing. 25.70
2006-08-130.05000 grams$100Only an hour's wait. Spent morning with mum, she visited my flat for first time in many years, then we went to Liddy St to see dad's progress. s/w Mitch on way back, decided to score immdeiately.16.56
2006-08-150.25000 grams$35Took a val at 6, rang M at 730, his phone cut out, went to bed at 10, M rang 10 minutes later, then I was up and off to do insanity. Spent an hour waiting outside his apartments, when he had said 5 minutes, then 3 hours at his shop doing work coz I got tick - bed at 240am54.85
2006-08-180.25000 grams$120Not much to say, rang him at lunch, had to get act together. By end of work (I started at630am so left at445), I could drop straight in and grab it off him. Easy-peasy, the way it's meant to be. This is the first half of teh half I grabbed, and it's quite nice. Paid back 40 tick he got a little edgy about last night when I tried for more tick65.79
2006-08-180.25000 grams$100Second shot for evening. Same size, got prickles on #1, this is more the knockout punch.4.37
2006-08-190.25000 grams$62.5Got half eightball, $600, shared with Jet and Michelle. Mumbles complained about it "being a bit rich" doing half eightballs, but hey, biz is biz. Saw Jack this arvo, he is a sad man.. Took half of 2moro's metro b4 I found out I was scoring.22.79
2006-08-200.16667 grams$0Found I had saved a bit much, about .3333 gn, too much for one shot, not enuff for 2 What to do? Add cow fertiliser?5.19
2006-08-200.18000 grams$0Brekky, never too wise for an ageing user7.16
2006-08-240.05000 grams$100Tick.M rang 8pm to let me know he was working, Wed night. Got a little sleep, M rang at 330am to see what was happening. Ended up sitting in a car in Milton from 5-7am 94.04
2006-08-250.25000 grams$150Easy score, but car locked in carpark. Stress. Karma35.26
2006-08-250.25000 grams$150Finished off the half, I twas a mess, been a mess at pares, no longer even trying to believe that they don't notice3.50
2006-08-260.25000 grams$50Could only get a q instead of a half. And it was S's time of the week to come over n say she was my friend. And borrow some cash. And get some gear. Oh true love!19.25
2006-08-270.10000 grams$100Waiting till 2 in the morn, then an hour out back of a carpark with some armed robbers being menacing just in their existence. Scarytimes, sad returns to flat for S to take half then disappear after nodding to rest of 'Identity' with J Cusack8.88
2006-08-290.25000 grams$50Started shopping at 530, got on and into me 1030. You do the math(s). Had to put in some hard yakka, lifting and moving at renovation site68.54
2006-08-290.25000 grams$50The rest of the mess I bought for the best of the best.1.44
2006-09-010.25000 grams$50Payday. Danger day. I ddidn't even come into today with a plan (aside-who needs a plan for a day, huh?). I am tired from a long week at work. Sad from the end of S&I. But it's been a month.66.57
2006-09-020.05000 grams$75Whoo.10.35
2006-09-020.05000 grams$75Awake, made sure I was a little awake b4 I ate this, knowing that as I am old now and not with repleneshing supply, I cannot use the second I wake, like a decade ago, I would prep the shot the night b4, then at consciousness's first stirrings I would stamp down on it with opiates. Now I slwoly rouse, shuffle around a bit, then stamp down.4.86
2006-09-020.06000 grams$95took out my last 190, short of 200 and got a 100 pack in exchange, last dregs of the dregs12.00
2006-09-030.04000 grams$0Freebie for getting shorted last night13.62
2006-09-040.25000 grams$50Crud for dinner again, Steve Irwin died today. As I type this 2 hours later my headache has returned and I feel shiteful, stiff neck, just want to lie down...31.71
2006-09-080.25000 grams$50Crud, but not so bad. Got invited up to bodouir.95.06
2006-09-080.25000 grams$50The rest of the half I bought earlier, so no waiting etc etc. Not psycholigically in a position where I can hold gear overnight .1.98
2006-09-090.25000 grams$50Crud, new crud, promises of greatness, who believes these promises?19.43
2006-09-090.25000 grams$50Rock hard, broke up under a little heat, good up front but little lasting power3.71
2006-09-100.25000 grams$50Woke up M, it took 2 hours from first call to handover.18.63
2006-09-100.25000 grams$100J-Frog came, put into actiona plan I'd been musing on all arvo. J looks well, he'd been down in Melbs for a few months. A chance to talk to a single bachelor, which was good.5.51
2006-09-120.25000 grams$100Drive to Caboolture. Pick up. Take. Drive back. That simple. NO "I"ll be down in a minute" every half hour. Such relief.(Blew my mortgage direct debit, but hey, c'est la vie)47.91
2006-09-140.25000 grams$40Tickety Tock, luckily M was v distracted by the pokies and gladly took the 40 I had so he could feed that beast.51.02
2006-09-150.25000 grams$100Banging up at work, not pukka.16.88
2006-09-150.25000 grams$100Home, doggy staying over, lil Fitz. Drunk janitor harassed dog's owner, we all have our crutches and as night falls we gathe rthem to us.3.68
2006-09-150.25000 grams$100Friend M staying over while his mate works through the night.4.80
2006-09-160.25000 grams$100A surprise shot. My favourite kind. I took all 3 of my quarters yesterday, deliberately leaving nothing for today. When I woke, D pops in and asks me if I want some gabo. Derrrr9.48
2006-09-160.25000 grams$100Sitting at home sad. Second weekend in a row with no S contact. This is as I willed it yet I am sad.12.24
2006-09-170.25000 grams$100Out to Fishermans Island to score. Despite the notice, stilla forty minute wait at a BP in that barren landscape.16.53
2006-09-190.25000 grams$100Out to Sunnybank, waiting for half an hour, blow the money I had reserved to cover the mortgage payment I'd blown off last week.53.35
2006-09-190.25000 grams$100Gabo with dinner. Sheer decadence.1.14
2006-09-200.25000 grams$100None22.03
2006-09-220.25000 grams$100Oh dear. Oh dear oh dear oh dear. Bought half eightball. 3 shots since lunch. Junkie over for dinner. Others ringing during said dinner, I run upstairs to meet them. Oh dear.42.46
2006-09-220.25000 grams$100I'd ask where will all this end but that doesn't worry me as much as where will I be in the time b4 it ends? 2.13
2006-09-220.25000 grams$100And S seems to have come by and picked up mail from the box outside. Did she come in here? Use OC? 4.00
2006-09-230.25000 grams$100Morning blats. Tried to make sure I was awake b4 I had it but I am still rubbing sleep from my eyes as I write this 10 minutes post blat. A minute after the shot it was diahorrea city. A sign of things to come. If I get another ha-ball I will definitely affect my work. If I stop now I will just be feeling super crusty on Monday. To use or not to use, that is the question.12.73
2006-09-230.25000 grams$100None-but seems this is a shot from a half-eightball bought at lunch this day4.60
2006-09-240.25000 grams$83Shell Nudgee. Used a dirty of mine. Had just driven from Yandina at up to 140km/h Cannot say I was sick, but I was v keen. Bought half a half-eightball. It costs me $250 and I get .875g - more than 3 qs that I would pay $100 each for here and get major stuffing around. So I am in unfortunate situation of having to buy bulk, i.e. more than I really want/need, coz these people only grudgingly went down to a half-eightball as minimum. 23.08
2006-09-240.25000 grams$83Try to hold onto the last bit of it till morning. That will be a) not piggish and b) smart, as I would appreciate it more in the morning than tonight. still love S, can't seem to shake it.1.26
2006-09-250.25000 grams$83Had I still been in a relationship of sorts with S, this shot would never have lasted till this morning.I mean, if we pretend that I had scored twice the amount of gear, and yesterday at lunch was the last time I'd used, no way would S have gone to bed holding this q. It would have been gobbled, probably by 4pm yesterday, and I would have been sent out on a new mission to get more gearfor brekky So there's one area that I am better off alone in. But I am happy to accept a failing of S' in this area, because tihs area is a failing in itself, I believe. So to me the real question is:"Does her 17.37
2006-09-260.25000 grams$100Double-dosed due to the heavy weekend, still felt crusty on arrival to home. Blew the $100 a friend paid back from weekend's excesses earlier. Been scoring everyday for a while now, big pain to come I think.37.50
2006-09-270.05000 grams$50Ferk. Usage. Top shelf, but I'm down in the gutter18.11
2006-09-290.28000 grams$83None-but looks like I bought a half eightball this day.52.85
2006-09-290.22430 grams$83Trying really hard not to SMS S and tell her that she is loved. What if she rollsacross the pert body of a Fabio to check the SMS? So be it. 2.17
2006-09-300.25000 grams$83None-but shot is part of a half-eightball bought the prior day5.08
2006-09-300.25000 grams$83Woken by Jfrog and Drew 4.75
2006-09-300.17950 grams$83None-but shot was part of a half-eightball bought prior day.6.33
2006-09-300.14103 grams$83I just wanted to finish off the bag so it wouldn't sit there eating away at me. Finish it so I can get on with feeling shitty and sick. How strange.1.34
2006-10-010.25000 grams$85Wanna stop. But I use. Wanna stop. But I use.24.54
2006-10-030.05000 grams$100Double-dosed again, not sure where I am. I waited two nights for Sim to show some love and failed, so at 11-ish I went out and scored. But the funny thing is she never promised or said she'd show some love. So why did I expect it.56.74
2006-10-040.05000 grams$100Brekk shmekk. Better than waking spewing, in the short term at least.6.82
2006-10-050.06000 grams$10020% more. For being a semi-regular customer. It's like Hungry Jacksor any othe rcorporate sales machine. Buy more and save.40.77
2006-10-070.07000 grams$100RBT and watching a guy drop before dawn.30.70
2006-10-070.07000 grams$50Sharing with S. Why and when etc etc. 2.83
2006-10-070.07000 grams$50None2.05
2006-10-070.05000 grams$50Got some for the morning, if it lasts that long.9.12
2006-10-080.02000 grams$40None12.43
2006-10-080.07000 grams$50None7.92
2006-10-090.07000 grams$100Oh, getting tired of this. I know I love S, I know that to be with her requires stopping this, I cannot put a and b together.26.64
2006-10-200.25000 grams$71None16.59
2006-10-200.25000 grams$71None0.17
2006-10-130.25000 grams$71None74.08
2006-10-130.25000 grams$71None2.17
2006-10-130.25000 grams$71Been straight for a bit. And today I felt as fresh as I've felt since S went. Nonetheless I was trying to score since leaving work yesterday. Tried tick from mumbles yesterday, told to wait a few hours. Tried him with cash this morn, told to wait a few hours till he'd slept. I was at work w/o car (panelbeaters) amd at mumble's mercy. Gave up on him and moved on to Roms. Trouble with them is min. purchase $500, lotsa gabo. Probably would have blown as much this w/e amyway on $100 packs but I got more gabo buying in bulk. My sad brain atm prefers less gabo, thinks it's reducing itself. As my s3.56
2006-10-130.25000 grams$71Watching the data ebb and flow Bris to Adelaide. FTP. Very stoned, despondent re Simmy. Gotta get rid of some of the hear b4 I use it all.1.92
2006-10-140.25000 grams$71None3.77
2006-10-140.25000 grams$71Mock day. Wearing my Doc Martens to work, on a Saturday. All full-time staff come in this morning to help out - data checking etc etc.Carrie S asked me yesterday if I was nervous, no, if I was stressed. I fibbed and said yes. The true answer is that through all this opiated haze, the only constant is pining for S. How pathetic of moi.6.28
2006-10-140.25000 grams$100None9.94
2006-10-150.25000 grams$100Sundays, out to Wishart to score, in car with M, waiting for Mr T and his magic bags21.06
2006-10-200.25000 grams$71FUck this i just fucking used ok. What can I say. It's 5 days later as I enter this and don't know what to say116.23
2006-10-200.56000 grams$71None10.39
2006-10-210.25000 grams$71Wakey wakey. S over last night. Love er. Confused. Know that if I slept around she would be devastated.8.67
2006-10-210.25000 grams$71Last shot of the $500 bag bought 10am yesterday. I thought about waiting another 15 minutes so I could tell myself that the bag lasted over a day, but then I thought this was just game playing. I do too much of that as it is. Should spend my time on more fruitful endeavours as dad would say.4.36
2006-10-260.25000 grams$85Jfrog rang. Was thinking of being good but it was too early - the 'concrete' hadn't set yet.133.54
2006-10-270.16500 grams$66All keen for more. Jfrog with his 1mg bupe a day habit. Me with my 17.5mg metro habit. Friend of J's, R, with no habit but drunk as a skunk. "Be careful" I say as they leave, and add I promised S that I wouldn't let R get any from me. 0.70
2006-10-270.25000 grams$71None-part of half-eightball I think14.75
2006-10-270.25000 grams$71None3.68
2006-10-280.25000 grams$100Woke up, went to work, scored on way. (Ed: Getting close to conversion time, less than a month away) 15.07
2006-10-280.25000 grams$100had to run to chem whilst working. Used and saw chem 2.07
2006-10-280.25000 grams$100None4.27
2006-10-290.25000 grams$100N drove me back from Yandina. Saw Lil. Met S at home, she was keen 2 score since night b4. Asked her to pokhara.(Ed: Nepal. Had a great time there in 93)18.22
2006-10-290.50000 grams$83.33S had asked for gabo the day b4 but I was up nth. She helped clean flat for hours as dad was coming over. 0.50
2006-10-300.50000 grams$83.33Woke v crusty 22.67
2006-10-300.50000 grams$166.66Day 5. double dosed metro, woke feeling shocking, slipping on the PHX project (also due to working on Sun project).Want to go OS in 2 mths but can't if I use like this.9.13
2006-10-310.25000 grams$83Amazing what a good feeling it is as you put away your last shot, knowing that a) You have no more gear and b) You have no more money to buy gear. Years ago this would have insyilled dread in me, now it makes me happy. I guess that's a kind of progress. 11.53
2006-10-310.25000 grams$80Jfrog buys me a q! Tick for a few days!10.87
2006-11-020.25000 grams$80And again, another q on tick!49.49
2006-11-030.25000 grams$71None.15.60
2006-11-030.25000 grams$71None0.00
2006-11-030.25000 grams$71Alley Bar - Ten Pin. Dean and Jfrog.7.00
2006-11-030.25000 grams$71.42None0.00
2006-11-040.25000 grams$71.42None15.68
2006-11-040.25000 grams$71.42None0.80
2006-11-040.25000 grams$71.42None4.02
2006-11-040.25000 grams$50Sim over. Watched Sabrina, spoke of India5.00
2006-11-050.25000 grams$83Bold as brass, with balls as bug as balloons. Well, that's how it felt anyways, ordering L to drop over a 250, with me with no funds in any pockets. Rocking up to her car, "Well, I haven't got a cent, I'll fix u up 2moro at lunch, yeah?". But to be honest, the first tick is always the easiest to get, although it's the hardest to ask for.24.18
2006-11-050.25000 grams$83M said I'd take it all, I showed him!2.20
2006-11-060.25000 grams$83.33Brekky on waking - never as good as u think it's going to be. All that sleeplessness anticipation, for what? Another blat, the 20th this month. 8.45
2006-11-070.25000 grams$75Tongue lashing from Madam L, for promising $250 yesterday and not delivering till today. Despite the pitifulness of her complaint, it is a valid point that I am slipping enough to start getting "tick by proxy" - turning up with no beans and blustering my way into getting a bag.37.57
2006-11-070.25000 grams$75So jfrog offered to pay all my tick and buy a 5 bag. If I didn't know him better I'd say this is the action of a cop - do anything to get me do a buy….0.60
2006-11-090.27500 grams$83.33dq's birthday, off to tenpin for gay bowling. Life goes on. First time I've interacted with d in what seems years.46.37
2006-11-110.50000 grams$83.33Sharing means caring, yes? 37.80
2006-11-110.25000 grams$83.33S rings at 630, she's been to the wake of a Jeremy H, a friend I never met. She was throwing up, v drunk the night b4, asked me for gabo0.43
2006-11-120.25000 grams$83.33SMS'd S to offer her a q, dd a follow up SMS fifteen minutes later, no response. I assume she's deeply asleep in the arms of some young Romeo. Good for her, hey (sarcasm, d'uh!)25.52
2006-11-120.50000 grams$83.33None0.88
2006-11-130.05000 grams$80Oh d'oh. I owed L a litle tick, I rang her and offered it to her, she said "add it to the next one ". Big surprise, Spent it elsewhere35.38
2006-11-140.20000 grams$0That feeling. When two clients have big beanz, and your dealer is unreliable, and you are trying to juggle all three parties into staying together and not getting pissed off, so you can get a tax, and you owe the dealer tick so you can't speak yr mind and say "You're a bitch for making my mates wait from 9am to 5om for your shit...." DID I CHOOSE THIS REALLY??18.02
2006-11-240.30000 grams$84.71Got on after a few hour wait for the L'ster. M&D having similar probs.(Ed-got a 500, moved 135 and 125, left me with 240 cost, think that was a half 8ball.)236.10
2006-11-240.30000 grams$84.71None3.00
2006-11-240.25000 grams$70.58Jfrog came over, told him of my gratitude for his "keep strong from S" pep talk the other day. I think tonight's my highest risk -she normally contacts me 6-620pm to get gear. I think tonight due to her anger at Monday night's debacle - see cell Q271(Ed:old Excel storage ref.) - she will ignore me, using that rage from the other night. Or maybe her rage will bubble over into need for gear and she'll contact me anyway...?? The mysteries of relationships. Of love vs. need. Of want vs dignity.1.48
2006-11-240.40000 grams$30S came over, I tried to resist but gave her gabo in the end. She asked, I had some, I always knew I'd give her some if she asked2.83
2006-11-260.25000 grams$90Had cash yesterday n didn't score, today I needed 2 see M who had done, he was on way 2 score, so I tried. T said he had none spare, wait till arvo. M gave me a q outta his.41.11
2006-12-010.25000 grams$40First in a bit, a new kind of sadness comes over me.119.11
2006-12-010.25000 grams$80Today I have had phone off, sad conversations with the ex.1.50
2006-12-010.25000 grams$80Maybe I'll be able to tomorrow.2.10
2006-12-020.33000 grams$80Is that what an OD would be like? I took 4 grains, only 1/5 more than usual. Now I sit at kbd, 11 mins later, and I can't think things through that fast.15.98
2006-12-050.21000 grams$70Met Ella tonight. Youth and beaity. What more does one need? Gear, according to her.85.05
2006-12-080.25000 grams$55" the walrus is laughing, 'goodby, goodbye, goodbye" says the song. Again and again70.44
2006-12-090.50000 grams$70Waited 4 hours to get on to her.16.81
2006-12-120.25000 grams$43.5S and I have dinner, jfrog and E come over. S cold to them, j tries to talk, little success. when they are gone, s is fine. She definitely doesn't want to mix in that world. But I say - We had to do that to get the gabo. No answer, other than false 'No we didn't'80.61
2006-12-180.25000 grams$83Loving a girl who doesn't love you142.47
2006-12-190.21660 grams$70Isn't there some rule about giving the dealer what he wants so you don't get ripped off next time? Bough a 250 bag for D, asked if we were sharing, he said Yes24.88
2006-12-210.20000 grams$50Scraps. I asked for none, she gave me some. Love feels real tonight50.64
2006-12-240.21154 grams$71.5Hopefully nearing the end of a hardcore binge. With S and a 3k bonus cheque I have spent the last few days in a haze of opiates. S had a dirty, got better, S and I slept in same bed, no "no touching" rules, but the heavy gabo level acted as my body's censor....oi vei.66.43
2006-12-250.25000 grams$70Only one for Christmas Day. Bigday is a week from now when sis comes from Philippines14.53
2007-01-010.37500 grams$62.5First shot of the year, got tick, no problems, all too easy, S at my place again tonight, lovely but she takes my hand off her tit178.31
2007-01-020.05000 grams$42.5"Where's my lighter? I just had an orange one. Where did it go I just had it." S is here to upgrade update her CV. We score a 100 for 85 from mumbler.28.14
2007-01-030.07500 grams$70Feeling shitey. Begged ebanz off dad. S and I sitting round flat sick waiting for beanz to come in. Bad old days? Not good, that's for sure. Confronted S about how she was gone for 4 months now she's back w/o a word. She said "we needed space, maybe we still do". A threat? Maybe honesty? But tonight she came here sick, and left once she was better. headfux.23.56
2007-01-040.05000 grams$50Saw mumbles, didn't do much, but dropping the extra metro was always gonna make things tough21.94
2007-01-050.50000 grams$100Got extra, Dean put in 200, got half….S is here for night26.32
2007-01-060.25000 grams$100none18.08
2007-01-070.15000 grams$60Drove to North Arm and back, for 32.5mg metro and part of a .3grm shot. Fuck this is a joke.20.27
2007-01-080.07500 grams$75S comes over for gabo, buys me dinner, choc and drinks. Outta $200 I repay her. I say nasty things, well she says they're nasty, I say they're just truth about how things are. All vconfusing.31.00
2007-01-090.05000 grams$25Mumbler, last 50 bucks, that I owed a friend. Got a 75 for it so that's ok. Here comes the pain!25.40
2007-01-110.37500 grams$0moan turns up, sick n sad. I get a q on tic, it turns out top be a 25 I didn't argue.47.59
2007-01-170.06660 grams$50Oh dear, went off at Moan, told her I shoulda killed her, and she'd prepped dinner, washed, cleaned flat, oh dear143.43
2007-01-180.25000 grams$50S's dole, her pay yesterday, when she forks out things get ugly quickly - "I need this back tomorrow"- "Don't you stillowe me some" - "FUCK YOU! I told you I couldn't pay all that back". Etc. Best keep away from goils with habits23.70
2007-01-180.37500 grams$75Back again, S needed some for brekky. Now a little stoned we prised our fingers off each others' throats. Not the bake but high quality crud, as Mumbles says2.20
2007-01-190.10000 grams$75As if I could skip a Sat shot atm. Not paying back the Roms the 250 tick I got last week freed up some capital for gabo acquisition. Still supporting S, am I more than an emotional accessory for her (as they say in Spaced which I am watching a lot of atm)22.16
2007-01-310.06660 grams$50Homemade hooch288.14
2007-02-010.40000 grams$100S says I am "Norty" for keeping this journal. Let's see what gets published later tonight. Really sick of this gabo gig, S doing the scoring.23.61
2007-04-010.75000 grams$125Getting ready to go to V Festival, couldn't wait till after with friends, so went early - got nothing outta this but a hole in the arm. 1,410.34
2007-04-020.03300 grams$0Back from Melbs, me back from Pixies, lush plus rockers!11.58
2008-07-010.20000 grams$75Sometimes a junkie will take gear that he/she knows to be crud, only because it is being offered 'on tick' and because it' seasy to get - in this case, a friend would deliver gear that i knew to be suspiciously dodgy. The suppliers don't themsselves use, just us schmucks on the ground... 10,958.97
2008-07-020.25000 grams$60Meant to give it a miss but I txted Sim.I broke (and used) not her. Disappointed in self26.88
2008-07-030.06660 grams$50sim's idea via SMS-only got 80, any ideas25.42
2008-07-030.03330 grams$50mumbles bit, v good. Sly stayed over, nice chat when we got off gabo topic 2.07
2008-07-040.20000 grams$75waiting waiting16.43
2008-07-050.25000 grams$60in the rain at milton 2 hours22.80
2008-07-090.20000 grams$75As usual, I was just starting to feel human again. Smiling at strangers, happy for no reason. But used and back to zero empathy...why?101.04
2008-07-110.20000 grams$75nil47.28
2008-07-130.14000 grams$70Shopping for myself. Here, several hours later, I have just told S and been told that "this is really fucked." My response was that I don't have an infinite supply of money. This didn't impress her much43.89
2008-07-160.25000 grams$50First in a few days - others waiting had been waiting since 8am, seems like end is near for Mr J77.23
2008-09-050.30000 grams$90Ah, shopping with M. Slow, expensive and a bit obsessive. But the gear is good, so I am prepared to put up with a lot.23.24
2008-07-180.20000 grams$75Met the couple out towards Uni, St lucia, sounds like it's outta the way but actually on my way home if i take the Uni bus then a ferry to Hoogley Park23.76
2008-07-190.20000 grams$60no visits to Toowong, Auch or West End, so I went bytrain to Graceville, then waited an hour.21.24
2008-07-200.20000 grams$60Sim's push, no bills this week, so off to score. Nothing to focus on but gabo23.52
2008-07-250.30000 grams$100accused by S of taking more than her. This is poss., but she had teh 40 i held for D in the end, so i guess she won.124.32
2008-07-260.20000 grams$50Came home saying I would not do this on S's payday, next Wed. S said "OK", which surprised me, expecting a fight.19.41
2008-07-290.20000 grams$75Decided that I have a better time with S without gabo. Is this a new maturity or just a fact I have ever hidden from self due to dope-love? Must explore deeper this straight relationship51.15
2008-07-310.20000 grams$60S's pay in late73.98
2008-08-010.20000 grams$60In town, met S, wanna shop but broke23.94
2008-08-060.20000 grams$60Biggish break I guess, never quite fel the usual great that one gets after 5 dats off117.12
2008-08-130.16000 grams$40Despite spending 400, you just get multiples of $50 (equals point one)167.28
2008-08-140.20000 grams$75Waited till I got home, how cool of me.25.92
2008-08-200.20000 grams$50Long wait but delivered to TWG. Three hour wait, not so bad when you're at work.139.68
2008-08-210.22000 grams$70Another long wait-Nads is outta the can. But they seem to take a while breaking stuff up etc. M has a new place to go at West End30.00
2008-08-220.50000 grams$85A few hour wait but at least it gets delivered...21.60
2008-08-230.25000 grams$50SMS'd M in error, thinking I was sms'ing W...so ended up trying this Bill Guy18.72
2008-08-240.30000 grams$60Last day in town for W, he goes off to M today23.52
2008-08-270.18000 grams$50Nads off over 24 hours, presume gone. DQ noticed this Tues 3pm, as of now (730pm) phone off. Offered M a tax on this, he took only a pinch78.72
2008-08-290.10000 grams$75Once again, relying on M, and he chose to see Mumbles - his cash was involved too and he asked me first, but I shouldn't have agreed. 48.24
2008-08-310.24000 grams$65No intro happening, and seeing M just makes S and I fight. So next payday, if we haven't been intro'd then we will not see B thorugh M, we will go without instead. Will it happen?44.40
2008-09-030.20000 grams$60S had to meet M to cash him up for Bill, fireworks ensued (perhaps, each sides story's differ). I had said that I was happy not to shop if M had not intro'd me to Bill by today. S agreed, until an hour after she was paid, then she was keen t osee "th75.36
2008-09-100.25000 grams$60So much driving, Coopers Plains and back so many times....169.29
2008-09-130.25000 grams$60Not felt so much but I don't unless it's a 150, these days. Spent an exhausting day catering to the dependent, playing fiddle t othe junk tune i guess.63.99
2008-09-150.20000 grams$50Horror night. M off nut, raving, wanted to punish S for previous slights. Refused to allow me to drop gear to her, took 2 hours to get him home.55.68
2008-09-190.44100 grams$91Back in the saddle again, walked to the valley for a gig, then phoned dq and scored. Aaah well. Bought dq a 50, sin a 50 also 98.16
2008-09-230.25000 grams$50Surprised when I rang N's number to find her turned on. But glad, as Sly and Mtch both v frustrating. With N i can just see and go, with others I have play some ridiculous ego-pandering game 94.37
2008-10-010.20000 grams$50Delivered to my work. Not bad service, and for only a century. Restores my faith in the next generation.190.29
2008-10-150.24000 grams$60Anzac Park, having a picnic with open shooting up when i met her. Charming.331.25
2008-10-250.20000 grams$60None240.50
2008-10-290.20000 grams$60to pares for movie after shot, too soon after i think, car accident on way home, other drivers fault.99.08
2008-10-310.15000 grams$70Didn't share. Scored post metro script hassles. S not sleeping at my place as a result. And I don't care. 50.10
2008-11-040.20000 grams$60Ho hum. Monies I'd tried to hold for mortgage payment. Aussie rang last week saying I had run outta funds in advance...so i did this, and shazam, blew it on gabo. What does that tell ya!. Gear looked flaky but worked ok. S said she got a headache, but went in to the whole affair negatively, I say!95.65
2008-11-050.20000 grams$60Crud again. Disappointing, bouncing direct debits...stress at work, had mild anxiety attack, chest pains, headache... 24.83
2008-11-060.18000 grams$50An hour wait. Got 50 tick, added up to a century of crud. 24.24
2008-11-070.10000 grams$60Drive to Graceville during lunch. Tried to arrange a quick meeting but no luck, 25 minutes waiting in a 30 minute lunchbreak - and i still had to buy workmates lunch, bank cash for S and drive back from G16.88
2008-11-070.20000 grams$55None.(Added later,03112010 - this must have been delivery to work on payday. A luxury that I would lose when I stopped seeing Nads. Now she has cancer and is in jail, if she lives at all)1.22
2008-11-080.27000 grams$60Got there 30 secs late, she was driving off to the next stop on the freeway - fig tree pocket. 22.70
2008-11-120.27000 grams$60Rubbish quality. Very moreish. Twenty minutes after 101.26
2008-11-120.25000 grams$50Again, perhaps my fault as I suggested we should get more, then quickly changed my idea, but could't talk my compatriot out of it. 3.14
2008-11-150.30000 grams$75Went out to Oxley station, found a new bakery64.15
2008-11-160.30000 grams$66Bek over, gear still not great but did anyway - storm here and it's a raining heavily...26.50
2008-11-190.29000 grams$65Long wait on Her buffday. So it goes. Happiness is in the damp air. Sum received presents, secret presents, from her Chinese seamstress co-workers..."I wanna give you a present but you must not react loudly" said one after S's squeals on the last gift alerted all. 75.12
2008-11-210.30000 grams$70Out to Graceville but not much of a wait. 42.46
2008-11-210.15000 grams$60Tried to wait till after Sim's dinner3.75
2008-11-220.30000 grams$75Bit of a wait, and as J turned up, 3 young schoolboys, all around 14, weree walking by as i leaned in the passenger side to swap cash for a packet. Another young junkie queued behind me-it was fairly obvious what was happening. But no fuzz, so no wuzzas!21.67
2008-11-290.30000 grams$75Still rubbish, but used to it now. Arranging with Jack a tester, hopefully. He didn't sound overjoyed to hear from me. 168.80
2008-12-030.30000 grams$60At last the gabs has gotten better. N said this was so and it was true97.29
2008-12-050.14000 grams$70Payday again, scored again. Things not great at work but this time for world economic reasons not "me and gabo" reasons, for a change. We cannot source any funds to re-lend.43.25
2008-12-050.40000 grams$120.6Bought one for me, one for S, and one for M - his b'day today and (I thought) he was broker and in need of gear.5.75
2008-12-060.24000 grams$60None.18.00
2008-12-070.20000 grams$50None26.75
2008-12-100.24000 grams$60S came over to my work, I had shopped and held for her. Proud fo my self-restraint.73.83
2008-12-120.15000 grams$70An hour and a half of 'Just ten minutes more' crud. Was getting this to compare it to new boys stuff.45.08
2008-12-120.25000 grams$50First time from new boys. On time, to the door, and powerful. A good start.5.33
2008-12-130.24000 grams$60Ah, this stuff is rubbish. 20.08
2008-12-140.21000 grams$55Nice. Decent. Don't go to bed sick, even eight hours post blast. This time yesterday, the same number of hours post N's blast, which was ten bucks bigger, I was rininging other dealers looking to score again. 23.92
2008-12-160.20000 grams$50Dentist day, there late of course, 35 minutes late to appt.44.98
2008-12-160.14000 grams$35Out to QEII for a top-up, how sad7.10
2008-12-170.24000 grams$60Gear nicer at last, not heavy like the other, and euphoric i guess, but dollar for dollar still not as powerful22.17
2008-12-180.28000 grams$70Used some of D's beanz, sorry D. She paid a 25% tax.19.42
2008-12-190.28000 grams$70A fair bit of waiting, maybe 45 minutes, and a hot evening. I have to admit, it sent me a little loopy.29.58
2008-12-200.25000 grams$50Only waited a minute or two, poifection for pooftas.19.83
2008-12-220.20000 grams$50New gal, over New Farm way, good at first but very murky, pill-esque51.58
2008-12-270.20000 grams$50Deduced this from phone records and ATM records a year later...thank you technology 118.25
2008-12-290.24000 grams$60Deduced this from phone records and ATM records a year later...thank you technology 49.58
2008-12-310.25000 grams$50Not such a bad trip, short wait... 42.25
2009-01-020.24000 grams$60Waited till after work, have to I guess with Richard 55.12
2009-01-030.24545 grams$50with dq, i shopped. He pushed for an intro. I said "Huh?" 17.52
2009-01-030.05000 grams$50Waiting for me at Spring Hill upon arrival 3.78
2009-01-040.20000 grams$50Returned Sims shoes, still short, so used Aussie Zoo ticket money. V sad. 21.90
2009-01-050.06000 grams$30Last dosh, last hopes. 28.90
2009-01-070.20000 grams$50Slow, but still better than Nad's average. Payday, could not resist. At least I had thoughts of resistance... 48.14
2009-01-090.24000 grams$60Did shift on Zed this arvo. 47.23
2009-01-090.20000 grams$65Out to Fig Tree Pocket, Little comfort inthose Figs 2.45
2009-01-100.20000 grams$50Just back from Fingal, day there with S and her bro. 21.36
2009-01-110.20000 grams$50Albion, stuffed around a little as I was forgotten at spot 1 and had to go across suburbs to meet up - but got unexpected tick, which is always good 21.12
2009-01-130.05000 grams$25Out to Mount Gravatt again, halves in fifty, oh how sad! 53.28
2009-01-140.25000 grams$62.5Bought extra for 2moro, will it last? 21.84
2009-01-160.25000 grams$60S is quite affected by thsi stuff but it passes straight through me. I know that's not really true as I don't feel ill and I can tell from an external viewpoint that I appear wasted. So why don't I feel great? Depression? Upcoming birthday? Rach's visit soon stressing me o48.34
2009-01-170.20000 grams$50getting tired of this... 16.94
2009-01-210.24000 grams$60Out at the MG Uni, nice bushy place, apparently unsafe for blatting as Uni and schnarbs patrol it... 103.32
2009-01-230.24000 grams$60I felt it okay, but dq says it is crud, although i can hear it in his voice, and he has been trying to pee for six minutes now, to no avail. 47.56
2009-01-230.05000 grams$0Surprise shout from friend MS. Always appreciated 3.43
2009-01-240.24000 grams$60Shopping through crud merchants. Funny how lower quality means a longer waiting time - you'd think it the otehr way round surely. 16.08
2009-01-270.24000 grams$60Delivered by DQ, repayment of a debt, crud-worthy 73.92
2009-01-280.24000 grams$60Friend shopped for me, so when it turns out to be crud you have to be suspect. I hate that. I paid today outta my mortgage repayment 27.36
2009-01-290.20000 grams$46.5Out to Mt G Uni. Mums bday, lunch at Sizzlers, nasty food, but nice surrounds. 1.5hrs on lunch. Stress increasing daily as unresolved bonking issue eats me. I cannot speak of it for some reason. 23.76
2009-01-300.30000 grams$75Rich ran out again so saw the gal with M. He thought it decent . Getting more stressed about little things than I should, I feel24.72
2009-01-310.22000 grams$60Birthday coming, but blowing all my pay, so i'll be broke on teh day...15.60
2009-02-030.24000 grams$60Midnight scoring. How stupid can one get. And on my birthday.62.64
2009-02-040.24000 grams$60Came to my work39.36
2009-02-060.24000 grams$60After work, tried to not do it. S got angry at me and we did.49.87
2009-02-070.10000 grams$50All my idea, blew last of funds, used funds for TPG re-connect direct debit. Dialup for anotehr week for me... 15.41
2009-02-100.24000 grams$60Whacky-doo. Almost too smashed to drive back. I guess that's a good indicator....Had extra metro to get me to work, drove the empty meter to a new record, 50 kilometres, but added a top-up from the can so I still don't really know at what point I'd putt-putt out... 80.82
2009-02-110.15000 grams$60Terrible night. S' payday, but it never turned up. We are always so set on shopping on a payday that we both get quite stressed and irritable if pay doesn't turn up. It means checking IB sites or ATMs every few minutes. Just a horrible night. S had headache from it all.... 24.30
2009-02-120.20000 grams$50Again and again and again....and tomorrow, and then I am broke before being paid23.71
2009-02-130.24000 grams$60Out the Mountain, Rache in Brissie, conflicted conflictions23.38
2009-02-130.24000 grams$60S is number One, apparently. Does this mean her chemist is her firiend or more. And she gace S'y a really cool pair of shoes and an ex-Mercky dress... Shoes were half a szie too small, and heelds. 'I never really wear heels anymore. She is half a size smaller than Sim. They're shoes Kylie Minogue would wear(Down to the stop or on stage? - A- Either4.37
2009-02-140.20000 grams$50Cannot break this Satdy shopping ritual. Tis breaking me though. Week after week I am too broke to eat properly, to shop, to pay small debts...18.86
2009-02-160.15000 grams$70Call from teh blue from M to repay a debt. Appreciated on the current environment of S being at the Mater with accidental metro oD.50.88
2009-02-180.20000 grams$55Nads off, Rich off. Mumbles done on Monday. SO Sly only option, out Goodna way. Terrible stuff, did nil to me.45.91
2009-02-190.20000 grams$50Waiting all week for a decent shot. Ever since S got out of hospital, no rest was I getting.24.65
2009-02-200.20000 grams$60Shar not in, so 430 finish for me. Payday, scoreday24.48
2009-02-210.20000 grams$50Drive pares, green flea, doing real stuff...19.44
2009-02-210.20000 grams$50We notice Sim's tax refund came in. Trying not to blow it all on gear...2.16
2009-02-220.20000 grams$50Planned not to , to buy a DVD n TV for S, but no, we score.18.91
2009-02-230.22000 grams$60Rich off, so tried the new Nads30.31
2009-02-240.20000 grams$50Maximum stress. Seeing M in New Farm, bitching aboyt ATM fees, took ten minutes to get outta the loo, blatting in posh NF hotels, then my metro script was a 90 minute wait for the doc, whilst expecting my dealer to turn off his moby at any minute24.62
2009-02-250.22000 grams$60This is day nine in a row, and it's sad but i feel human, not sick, not continually wanting. But i have lost human interactions. No desire to stay at S's, or to touch her, or anythingt physical23.40
2009-02-260.20000 grams$50Not sure of details - writing this later...possibly last of s's pay or tax return.25.15
2009-02-270.24000 grams$60Payday, never any doubt we'd shop. But it was a long run alreaday,over a week. Nasty21.84
2009-02-280.24000 grams$60So lucky I scored off R. Dad called me once we'd started scoring to ask me to pick him up and take him to hospital to see E and H. Took an hour to get to him - i R turned on just in time, Nads would have taken 2 hours minimum.. Dj'd at alex's 40th at night with dq. 15.18
2009-03-010.16000 grams$35Last dollars. (Bank) Fees came out the night before27.83
2009-03-030.10000 grams$50Woke up ill. Had to see M at train at 620 for some cash, then drive to Taringa then hospital then work. Meant to wait for lunch metro but snapped at 930 and blew 50 on Nads44.42
2009-03-030.16000 grams$40Last of today's cash, to the dollar, still short five bucks, but R is nice with tick. Small mercies10.01
2009-03-050.22000 grams$60In the city again, had anotehr decent chat about tech-stuff - phones and internet. A deaker who is not full of shit -who'd have thunk it? S and I drove to East Brissie main road and blatted in car as we are doing more and more these days - once s would never have stooped to this. Omens and portents everywhere I look.47.28
2009-03-060.20000 grams$60Crud. Possible mixup, may have been shorted 50 accidentally. Dammit. Kept trying to ring Rich for hours after eating this 22.71
2009-03-070.22000 grams$60First customer for the day for Rich. S's mum here, had to drop it off under her nose, as they say.16.50
2009-03-080.10000 grams$25Not bad for halves in fifty bucks. Last of our cash again...26.83
2009-03-100.20000 grams$50M repaid beans. Question as to integrity of source35.83
2009-03-100.20000 grams$50Fixed a building occupants' PC, got some dosh, dq lent 70, m lent 51 (51 mind you, not 50)18.61
2009-03-110.22000 grams$60S's payday, and it came in today, unlike last week. 23.88
2009-03-120.22000 grams$60Binge binge binge. Thinking of upping my metro from 20 to 30 from April first and S and I keeping apart for a month or so - her suggestion on teh separation...hmmm...together we would just keep on using regardless of metro increases.23.78
2009-03-130.24000 grams$60With DQ and M, at Holland Park, waiting waiting. Not great in the end22.98
2009-03-160.20000 grams$50Large storm in town led to a 45 minute wit in a "pay for park zone". 72.85
2009-03-170.22000 grams$50Much ado about nothing. Ordered 100, changed to 200, then was handed 100 for 200 cash. Had to await an additional twenty minutes for delivery boy to return and swap items. Rude people in DE LUX plated car yelled at B and I "which one of you hasd the penis", then were racist towards any asians walking by.24.98
2009-03-180.20000 grams$50lunchtime shops. S had day off, secret missions, who knows.17.33
2009-03-180.16000 grams$40and again. Now we are broke. Metro up next week.5.00
2009-03-190.16000 grams$40Long wait, given a century instead of 150, just like on Tuesday. Then the 150 did stuff all - half went to B, so had another unsatisfying shot.25.89
2009-03-200.20000 grams$50Ordered 120, received 100. Third mistake this week. Always less than I pay for, but then again, they always fixi it. But it takes an extra half hour. And todays they would only fix by shoving a twenty dollar note at me...22.68
2009-03-210.24000 grams$60Drove back from the coast. Had budgeted 80, spent 12019.68
2009-03-210.10000 grams$25Then blew another 50 without even leaving town. Fools we is1.42
2009-03-240.10000 grams$25None73.42
2009-03-250.24000 grams$60None24.50
2009-03-260.16000 grams$40None23.75
2009-03-280.10000 grams$50Final load from CP to D. (Helping Mitch move house-well, move his stuff. He hasn't a house to move to yet). 46.98
2009-03-300.20000 grams$50Shopped with B, then the plan was to go to hers and work on her PC. But just as I arrived at hers, 30 minutes post blat...dirty50.27
2009-03-300.26600 grams$50Dirty from above (previous shot), got tick on a century, this usually does the trick in terms of killing the sickness. Scoring this was a monumental effort. Thanks bek for driving me in. Thanks R for ticking it. Thanks M for driving me home.Friends.1.17
2009-04-010.24000 grams$60Final shot. All over with Sim now, she is happy to see me go.46.33
2009-04-010.24000 grams$50Very final shot2.79
2009-04-030.18000 grams$40Didn't shop during the day, S asked at lunch, in arvo, and again at home after dinner. Broke and scored. Spent book money, fun money.48.48
2009-04-080.24000 grams$60S's payday. She actually offered me an out. But I went along anyway. Try not to tomorrow. Tooth hurts again, upper right back - the one I was meant to have root-canalled in December118.08
2009-04-090.20000 grams$50none23.15
2009-04-100.24000 grams$60None recorded24.00
2009-04-110.15000 grams$35Got 20 tick 19.57
2009-04-150.20000 grams$50Good timing.101.28
2009-04-160.20000 grams$50Again. S very frazzled, art exhibit 2 days away, friend took Sache job instead of her...Mpt noticing any metro benefit anymore after April 1 increase23.76
2009-04-170.24000 grams$60Out to Mt Grav, introing B 2moro, broke again, really gotta grab hold of this 23.88
2009-04-180.20000 grams$50I get less pay now but it doesn't seem to hold me back. Just harder into poverty...18.18
2009-04-190.24000 grams$40Shop with B, she repaid a loan early. Still broke, used it all for gear. Stupid 23.22
2009-04-200.10000 grams$50Spur of the moment, my fave type. B rang and asked for Rich's number - stimulus package came in25.20
2009-04-210.27500 grams$75Stimulus pack cash. Overdoing it, perhaps just to see what happens. Big surprise. A feeling of numbness... 29.76
2009-04-210.20000 grams$50No more to say...would S become more like the old S, passionate, shall we say, if she had enough gear? The answer is no. And how stupid was I to think that the answer may be otherwise. That girl is gone. 1.44
2009-04-220.24000 grams$60Misdirected by R. Dark early, lost and dismayed at spending so much so fast. Sense of isolation grows 22.80
2009-04-230.24000 grams$60Off to pares, root canal that needs doing is giving me major pain still, 24 hours later. Booked in with dentist for 13 days hence, I have to wait that long to raise the first $400 payment. Will spend five times that on gear in the meantime23.30
2009-04-260.15000 grams$40More tick, last of cash. Less than a week since we both received govt stimulus we are down to empty tanks of fuel and eating leftovers for four days, until next pay. 67.70
2009-04-280.20000 grams$50S on hols. Repaid ten bucks of tick. Extra metro hasn't helped at all. 53.35
2009-04-290.20000 grams$50Repaid a little tick, by accident, R brought 20 too little, but 20 was what we owed him. 23.04
2009-04-300.24000 grams$60Blowing money I was keeping to buy some special art. Hard to keep my eyes open. 23.85
2009-05-010.24000 grams$60Saw Doc today. Had argument re decriminalisation. She said she would not like to see me in a decriminalised gabo world. I said it would remove a lot of crime. 21.87
2009-05-020.24000 grams$60S's art exhibit finished today. Blowing the income on gear. Depressing. 23.45
2009-05-030.20000 grams$50Off to Mt T to visit S's ma. A little break in a world gone chemically savage. 18.68
2009-05-050.24000 grams$60R out. This was much nicer. And closer to home. 56.67
2009-05-060.00000 grams$020.92
2009-05-060.24000 grams$60Dentist. Root canal step A. $455. S's pay came in luckily and helped out. Still had to short the doc... 2.69
2009-05-070.12000 grams$64How stupid am I trying to see notoriously late Nads during my 30 min lunch, when i have to pick up my metro in the same thirty minutes... 18.81
2009-05-070.15000 grams$36.8596Possibly N gave me ten instead of fifteen. Common error. Or maybe I'm just getting a tolerance rapidly. Took 65 up front then this 35 half an hour later.A century whilst working.1.00
2009-05-070.20000 grams$50Dropped B off at airport, she's getting a 'freshstart' to use a trademark. Good on her for solid decision making. She said she had no choice, but she did, she could have slid further into nastiness 5.50
2009-05-080.24000 grams$60Dentist wasn't taking advance cash happily. Blew it on gear instead. Hopefully the PC repair job 2moro will earn enough to cover it... 22.92
2009-05-080.28000 grams$50Done by hand, twice as large as the last. That's the only good thing about Nads - large packets occasionally 2.25
2009-05-090.24000 grams$60Follow the car that parks in front of you, he tells me. Spy-like life.15.67
2009-05-100.17000 grams$40No to tick! Borrowed fifty from pares, very low moment 30.00
2009-05-130.24000 grams$60Rich came down to see us. B still ill from bladder infection, post-op implant. Recommended I go to Africa with an implant71.86
2009-05-160.20000 grams$50I verbally stated to S - "This is becoming a habit I don't like - scoring every Saturday monring". Perhaps it had some effect, who knows. Restated my longheld belief that if one is to live this lifestyle then one should be on the dealing side of the fence not the scoring. I appreciate that she is trying to protect me by not letting me deal, but the alternative is this neverending poverty and depre65.73
2009-05-170.20000 grams$60Expecting to use today as grunge day, to get over the last run. Then a call from L, willing to cover me and S plus dosh for hers. I folded immediately. I was at B's, dropping off a bookshelf.26.43
2009-05-180.20000 grams$50Blowing mortgage beans, in hope that PC repair beans will be in tonight to cover it. Bad behaviour. Not seeing a chance for a two or three day break in the near future.27.82
2009-05-190.24000 grams$60Blowing dental beans. S and I have had extra cash lately-her artwork, my PC re[airs. stimulus packs X 2. and it has all amounted to just extra gear. little purchased, a minor debt or two paid off.23.75
2009-05-220.24000 grams$50Shopping for L, 3rd time this week. Paying bills still, which is good.71.75
2009-05-230.24000 grams$50L chipped in. I was very keen not to do this, S pushed. This upset me, S realised I did not want to do, she followed me to my place and buzzed in after I'd left hers saying I was not keen to shop. Met a gal called Jo last night in the Valley at Rics. Interesting19.25
2009-05-250.20000 grams$50Ah, silly. Had a day off, I guess. Then blew my little savings account, now that I've found a way to transfer it electronically quickly between FIs. Another bit of knowledge I wish I had never learned. Can you unlearn things?53.08
2009-05-270.20000 grams$50At least we had a day's break. Which wasn't bad as I had seventy bucks cash last night and S still didn't ring and ask to spend it. For us that's a victory of sorts. Respect to her, as I texted her last night when it was clear she wasn't going to ask47.50
2009-05-290.30000 grams$75A little depressing. S in bad mood again, constantly, B tells me she is just a drug-buddy and her continual bad mood enables me to believe her.48.26
2009-06-010.24000 grams$100Got a 120 for a century, N's mistake. Nice of her to wipe the extra 20. S texted me to say she would contact me tonight but no call, perhaps whilst out. Phil the painful rang my mobile - "I need to get those keys off you". For the MR2. Cheeky, what. Hate the guy I do. Cornered me whilst he was drunk, I just wanted to get away....73.24
2009-06-030.20000 grams$50S's payday, she rang at lunch. First time I've seen her in a few days, since i stated the "so you're just a junk-buddy". She did not deny, just calmly said "So, can we go score?". Indifference or acceptance? That was Sat. Had tea at hers tonight after scoring.46.58
2009-06-040.18000 grams$42.5Blowing last of S's beans. Fight with her re me paying for her gear, plus her dentistry but not giving her enough extra24.75
2009-06-050.24000 grams$60Payday, gear, S at dentist, she took the day off. R was off as usual, so Nads it was 23.25
2009-06-060.20000 grams$50L chipped in, lent 50, blew all my beans save 15 which I need for petrol to Caz's wedding down the coast. Won't say stupid, as stupidity to me implies error, rather than flawed reasoning which I exhibit. Still, it pisses me off.17.83
2009-06-090.20000 grams$50Borrowed 5 from B, 5 repaid from an earlier loan to her, no cash for petrol, no cash for food. But all goes on gear.78.92
2009-06-100.20000 grams$50Out to Mt G, petrol has been on empty for over two paydays, got it off empty for about fifteen minutes tonight... 23.67
2009-06-110.05000 grams$40Sly's homebake. No upfront feeling or taste, but as dq said, "its got legs". That it does. Very clean, gabo in its purest state I guess. My 2 main suppliers were both out when I finished work, hence the visit to my old mate Sly.25.00
2009-06-130.20000 grams$45Trying to skip Sats' perhaps we need to indulge less during the previous week. Big shop done last night at least. Groceries for a week!40.50
2009-06-140.20000 grams$25Our last 50, S had held onto it, the choice was movies and coffee, or gabo. Tried hock shops for my iTouch (I can get 80 on it at the moment), a desperate act and one I have avoided all but once this last five years, in the end R offered some tick. Thanks R25.58
2009-06-160.05000 grams$0freebie from a visiting dq. Not requested, given outta guilt. 53.50
2009-06-170.20000 grams$75Repaid fifty tick. All stress and frazzled. Photocopier tech turned up at work at 420 to stay for an hour, after I'd arranged to go to Mt G with S to shop. So boss cranky that she had to wait back an hour (though she would've been there anyways...), then the gear turns out to be crud, unless that was thre result of my stress...22.92
2009-06-190.24000 grams$60Big spend of the week, and for crud. Wore off within thirty minutes of using. Embarassed as I had covered dq. 48.08
2009-06-190.10000 grams$50Shopped again, just for self b4 Star Trek movie again 2.33
2009-06-200.20000 grams$50Hocked iTouch. Have little cash as most goes to bills as pay comes in. So I hocked iPod, completely of my own volition, S was with her mum. Movies last night with dq. Seems we have all lost our way a little.19.33
2009-06-240.24000 grams$60First gab in four days. Nearly didn't happen-all 3 sources off. I could feel S building up to hassle me into ringing M to see voodoo, but then Nads turned on.Now it's a day later and I feel shocking. Not worth it.98.50
2009-06-260.30000 grams$75Nads didn't have a 120, so went for bigger rather than smaller. And perhaps we should take more, given the shock of Michael Jackson's loss today. A coworker wept on hearing the news, her mum told me. Paedophile junkie dies aged 50, funny how this is cause of sadness. How many children who never even had the chance to utter tehir first words, dies today from malnutrition? Several thousand I believe47.92
2009-06-270.24000 grams$60Aaah, stupidity. Did well this week, using only Wed and Fri - paydays. But got burned badly last night, $250 for little return, so perhaps that put me in the "I'm going to keep scoring until I get stoned" mood that is common to many junkies. Anyway, I was aware of my desire to not use today and did anyway.19.25
2009-07-010.24000 grams$60After work, S paid, out to Coles at the Gabba. S unhappy at work, but there are new jobs on Seek taht she won't chase. Terminal disillusionment is real.100.83
2009-07-020.20000 grams$50Parking ticket beans - used to score.24.58
2009-07-030.24000 grams$60Payday, scoring again.What to say? Didn't go shopping after this time, that was a pattern we were trying to affirm - spend cash on food whilst stoned, as if we left it a day we would spend it on gear...24.67
2009-07-040.24000 grams$60No breaks, no rest. A cold weekend, I write this a day after using and the cold will not leave my bones.17.42
2009-07-060.15000 grams$35Cancelled my mobile phone direct debit. Well, I say cancelled, I really just took out the cash that was meant for it. That'll be a $25 fee to bounce a $29.55 debit. 55.08
2009-07-080.20000 grams$50Payday for Moan. She got quite sick off this. I have been experoincing headaches and reduced stoned time since changing suppliers from R to N around 3 weeks ago. N's has a stoning impact but is very rough. R's you feel little from but it pushes off withdrawal for longer45.67
2009-07-090.20000 grams$50Off to shop on a Thursday. Have already spent more than my pay that comes in tomorrow, yet all I will think about as I finish work is scoring. I have created a life in which money is not important, and also of paramount importance. For one use only.24.08
2009-07-100.25000 grams$66.665Just got changed and found a big drencharooni of blood on my right ankle of my work pants. How long has it been there? It looked like it may have been there from before tonight. Am submitting drencharooni to the ISO committees in Belgium for official recognition in the annals of user bloodslash measurement.24.33
2009-07-110.20000 grams$50Tried to not do this. Spent 80 of my last 81, S spent 20 of her last 110....she argues that she'll be supporting me when I have no cash, but I would rather just look after myself and go evenly in the spending18.17
2009-07-130.20000 grams$60S rang in and told work she wouldn't be in. Not so much sick as sick of her job. She is depressed. Worryingly so. I asked her to score for us whilst she was off work, she didn't, and I gave her grief for it. I did not know she was depressed when I did so54.02
2009-07-150.24000 grams$60Offered to S that we skip today, which is a good sign for me. Compared to Monday when I was going crazy - used my mortgage dosh to score. Aussie HL rang me this arvo, my actions do have consequences 48.02
2009-07-160.20000 grams$45Rang Nads - looked like an hour plus wait. So tried R, although it had been disappointing the last time or three. But it was quick, and a couple of hours later I am feeling this weird mix of nodding off and wanting more gear - so maybe it has sleepers in it, but it has bugger all gear...who knows, with no mandatory govt testing of supplies, it could just be ajax - again23.55
2009-07-170.24000 grams$60Friday night. Terrible traffic, tried Nads (over Hamilton) got delayed with her stuffing around so tried Rich, but couldn't get to Mt Gravatt-all Gateway and Freeway stuffed.25.50
2009-07-180.24000 grams$60Last night Nads' had little effect, so saw Rich instead. Waste of time. All my pay spent on gear wasted. Food for thought18.25
2009-07-210.30000 grams$60Crazy. When you're broke, you get no tick. But when you have cash to flash, somehow the feeders know and a frenzy begins. Look out for your kids, readers. Look out for yourselves...75.75
2009-07-210.20000 grams$50Burning through cash like chocolate on my tabletop. S gets a big refund, I pay 3 cents. Whatever, as the disaffected youth say. 4.83
2009-07-220.20000 grams$50Was going to try to go a payday without, as S rcvd lump sum tax cash yesterday and we did it quite hard...but I guess I didn't really push the issue. I know I would not have succeeded, but I still should have tried. Two shots yesterday made this morning very rough.19.92
2009-07-240.24000 grams$60Shite. Rich has been continual shite for a couple of months. Tried Nads first but was told W had to wait for N to return home. This takes a while historically, hence the trip to Mt G. But I was looking for metro etc just on an hour post-shot. If the gear had worked I would not have been doing this.48.50
2009-07-250.24000 grams$60W pumped me up to 120 with a quick push - I had booked 100 but had 20 in my pocket, dangerous combo. So when he offered, I was all "Yes yes" in nanoseconds...Easy prey for deep diving predators20.25
2009-07-280.20000 grams$40None.68.58
2009-07-290.20000 grams$50First in four days. Trying to enforce S to spend only what she can pay for. Hope this will minimise both our usages. Sounds like the opposite of common sense, but if S only uses when she can afford, and I only use when S does, then we should only blat twice a week. A semblance of normality may seep back into our lives with the subsequently saved dosh...32.08
2009-07-300.20000 grams$50Out to bus stop at F Gardens again. Not a 3 hour wait like last night though.22.75
2009-07-310.07000 grams$52.5Tried 3 calls to Nads, no answer, no return. So got p'd off at this consistent ignoring of calls so rang Sly. Turned out okay, he was v polite, no nonsense delays like days of yore. DQ was there too getting his daily bread.23.83
2009-08-010.25000 grams$60Bit of a wait, perhaps Nads' runner is getting a bit jacked off with the lifestyle. D down in Brissie for weekend. Being run by a monkey with a shorter leash than mine, but playing same game.18.50
2009-08-020.07000 grams$37.5Sunday, brokeday. Ended up buying S 2 X $50 in the last 2 days despite my decisions of last week. Now I am broke. Went and saw Sly - he got a bit hyper after eating extra gabs to go Coles shopping, weird26.50
2009-08-050.20000 grams$50S paid late, borrowed a century from work. Well, 120. Bought Magnums, had salmon for dinner. Life continues75.00
2009-08-060.20000 grams$50Tried Nads for 15 minutes. The last few weeks it has taken up to an hour just to get through, then often an hour's wait. Luckily Rich's product improved and now is worthwhile. Plus he's a decent human to deal with. Polite, on time etc. Such a difference from the Nads stuffaround Show.23.50
2009-08-070.20000 grams$50Another Fri night. Back to the Mt Gravatt routine. Did a big shop after scoring. $82 worth. I will be broke but well fed....24.25
2009-08-080.24000 grams$60Rich again. Training Nads (Will) by ringing once only - if he doesn't answer I don't try again. A week ago I was ringing twenty times and then when W finally answered, I would wait another hour at least. My long usage has taught me not to allow myself to be treated like that.18.92
2009-08-100.20000 grams$47.5Frazzled. Low on petrol and any cash. Mt Grav drained teh little fuel I had. Making bad choices and knowing I am doing so52.95
2009-08-120.20000 grams$50Got onto Nads (W) after ringing three times. Go to Sherwood he said. We wnt there, then tried three or five times to ring him - always rang out. Assume he is doing this out of some malice/deficiency. Waited ten or fifteen minutes then went to Mt Gravatt and saw R immediately. W has not yet rung back.44.97
2009-08-130.25000 grams$65Intro'd dq to the boyz. he grumbled as he always does but i think he will go back. Seems no one is happy in this game but what can one expect of a lifestyle that does nought but drain?27.25
2009-08-140.14000 grams$70S up north. When I woke this morn at S's, I told myself I would skip gabs tonight.By lunch I was making plans in my head on scoring progress. Where did my mind change. It was not a conscious decision I know.23.58
2009-08-150.30000 grams$60About to drive 120km north to pick up S. Hoped she may catch train but no. Will spend week broke now due to my appetite for self-annihilation. An unexpected side-effect when you are young and looking at this existence. Who thought about the financial side back then?18.75
2009-08-150.20000 grams$50More. Just driven 250km, I guess I used that as an excuse, but it was really greed. I have to spend more(all) money before Saturday or I just shoot it all. Sad but true.6.25
2009-08-160.20000 grams$50Naughty. Shopping on Sunday. Happened I had few urgent bills, so blew cash.20.08
2009-08-170.20000 grams$50six days in a row. badness. feelin bad at work knowing another shot will allleviate it for a few hours, and so decide to take that path27.58
2009-08-200.20000 grams$50Finally S was paid. I wanted to see Nads, but she was engaged for the 15 minutes we tried. S is very over the Nads attitude to dealing71.92
2009-08-200.20000 grams$50Second shot of the evening. We are happy to put up with substandard gear in exchange for quality of service. The childish shenanigans of Nads' boys is pointless.0.67
2009-08-210.24000 grams$60Dad's birthday. My knee quite painful.Damaged it as a child, now it's returned. Must see physio.Nads keen for me to shop for her, her guy is no good. Jfrog rang and made the connection. But I know noone any longer23.17
2009-08-220.20000 grams$50Too much bean spending. Doing this meant S and I would have no funds for dinner or food until next pay, 5 days away. And still we did it. S hoped some cash from selling a painting of hers may have arrived...see next shot.20.50
2009-08-220.20000 grams$50Impromptu driving lesson at QEII sports ground helped calm things after R's driver, Luke, gave me a serve for letting S sit beside car-'think how it makes me look' he said. He is right, we have gotten lax.4.42
2009-08-230.21000 grams$60Unexpected. L texted out of the blue, and she covered as is our modus operandi.Thought today would be the first gab-free day but not to be. Still cannot say no.20.83
2009-08-260.24000 grams$55Terrible arvo.Bad traffic. Ended up trying Sly,Rich and Nads, but stuck like flies in honey. Fought with S, blaming her for bringing me to teh Valley. And L had rung, so shopping for her added stress.Then cops near Rich, nasty nasty.75.17
2009-08-270.20000 grams$30Last of S' pay, we asked for 40 tick but unsure if we rcvd it or not...it looked sort of small.Long wait, paranoia tells me this is because of the credit request23.42
2009-08-280.25000 grams$60Last automated payday, boss returns mid-next-week, then pay becomes manual again. Still playing with the perl counter on index page. Want to add some logging....ip addresses, times perhaps.24.17
2009-08-290.20000 grams$50Richy off, gave him an hour but it seems he's a sleeper-innerer. So went the Nads path, v easy, but it was murky, and the salesman asked me where he could score from...not encouraging.17.58
2009-09-020.30000 grams$75S payday, went for 150 instead of 100, and hoping to skip using tomorrow night. Quite decent. Then off to city for Sushi Station, yummy, 6 plates...Rich took 45 minutes to arrive, unsure why.102.50
2009-09-040.10000 grams$60Scammed! Received a 50 in exchange for 120 cash. But not the age-old junkie scam, just a high-volume business transaction error. Rang the manager, explained the predicament, provided receipt (empty [plastic baggie), and received a 120 bag for 120 cash. Simple and stress-free47.50
2009-09-040.24000 grams$25This was the replacement, and it worked. Stoned now, but would've preferred to have had it all in one go. No shot on Saturday for us...0.83
2009-09-060.24000 grams$50L rang - yesterday she had cancelled, generating ire. Promised myself I would spurn her next approach, but no, bug surprise, the gabo demon won out - again.44.92
2009-09-090.24000 grams$60Glen got p'd, as dq and s hopped in car.dq repaid a loan so no dosh needed from S. Hadn't spoken with S since Sun. Emotionally immature she says, I guess my silence proved this. Pointed out our kisses had been passionless since 01, she asked 'what do u think that means?". Depressing. 74.33
2009-09-100.20000 grams$30Last of beans. Got 40 tick. I am so broke tomorrow, paying back L for covering us earlier in week. I have to stop this.24.08
2009-09-110.20000 grams$70This didn't do much. Repaid 20 tick. Perhaps no vals all day (had 1/4 xanax later) made me too edgy. And so broke, as usual. 23.92
2009-09-120.20000 grams$60I think I am suffering more from valium w/drawal than lack of gear. v. agitated during two Writers Festival talks with mum this morn. Couldn't focus, and when mum offered to leave early I jumped at the chance. Not so cool. 20.75
2009-09-130.10000 grams$75Some duplicity used by me today.Shopping for friend L, the normal man, R, had not turned on. Afraid to lose the transaction (Sunday's are tough days) I fronted up, took cash, then feigned his non-appearance, whilst I ran 'cross town to Sly. Such vaudeville antics.22.75
2009-09-160.20000 grams$50S paid late, had that nasty day of worry that maybe she wouldn't get paid, maybe I wouldn't eat dinner again, maybe we wouldn't score. Pathetic way to live.By the time I enter this, all her cash is gone, she spends 255 of 537 income on rent. Pushing my online shop idea again tonight, must get a strategy for this up and running...76.42
2009-09-180.24000 grams$60Again, and again and again. And never.48.00
2009-09-190.22000 grams$66Sat, I cannot seem to resist my ritual scoring on first day off. Nads keeps saying 'ring back in an hour'. Sly I am annoyed at. So see Rich, lend dq a little beans, the whole thing was a waste. Quality v low.19.75
2009-09-200.25000 grams$35Got 30 tick, but blew mortgage money. Must try to borrow 70 to avoid dishonour fees. Still working on trying to eliminate Thrus, Sat from usage schedule. Sundays, well, hadn't even considered them as danger ground..24.17
2009-09-230.07000 grams$48R's gear crud, S's pay unsure, so dq insuring pay and we see sly 2gether. Not a pretty night, especially after my last interaction with Sly was S saying THANKS, THANKS FOR NOTHING after a tick refusal last Thurs. Nothing quite so demeaning as this lifestyle, in my experience. Also made error splitting shot, 20% in Ss favour.76.08
2009-09-240.05000 grams$35Tiny bits, but they work. Pure as the driven snow, I guess you say. No waiting on delivery, just another transaction. Good service. But a bit rough on the heart, as S pointed out. Having stabbing pains in that area all day. And some in the brain. Clots maybe?24.17
2009-09-250.20000 grams$62.5Repaid 25 tick from the 20th. S off to hang with her mum for a day. Saw R, expected it to be shite, but not so bad. Was going to see Sly also, but don't need to now.Quiet at work, running out of money there too.23.92
2009-09-250.03330 grams$50S off with her mum. Sort of saw this shot coming, a Friday night on my own - I should spend it writing, or reading, but no, I socre and hang out in a shooting gallery3.00
2009-09-260.07700 grams$60Sly miscalc'd and gave me a 120 instead of 100. He was aware of teh error, so it was not theft. This stuff great but rough. Brain fuzz.16.58
2009-09-270.06600 grams$30Sunday, tick day. Thanks Sly. Sleepy now. Got comments working on web-site, an easy implementation of GentleSource code - it even created teh db tabels etc for me24.67
2009-09-300.24000 grams$60Ok, S's pay, conscious decision to stay away from Sly' product. For me anyway, the last 2 days (w/o gear) have been rougher than usual. Awake at 6am both days, straight to the loo, yukky, desperate for metro. Delayed going to work Tues morn to wait for chem to open-so I was 25 mins late.75.33
2009-10-020.24000 grams$60Fri arvo, the usual score erupted into a breakup, believe it or not. I refused to do the shop-I provided cash and transport, had arranged the deal, but R wanted a car in one spot and a person elsewhere. Not so viable for me to pickup, as S not a driver. But S put her dainty foot down, and we ended up heading home b4 she buckled.48.33
2009-10-030.24000 grams$60Sly, weird stuff.S chucked in 20 beans. Usual crowd at Slys, bit of a gallery17.25
2009-10-040.06600 grams$30Saw Sly, only had 60 between us but he was nice and assisted.27.00
2009-10-060.20000 grams$50Rushing to get to Harry Potter n Half Blood Prince, with dq. Sim pulled out, off to help bro with Caxton legal interview50.50
2009-10-090.25000 grams$62.5Fri eve, shopped for tonight and tomorrow morning-S and I have a bowling date with her halfbro, David. I shopped to avoid being held up in the morning (Saturday morns Rich doesn't turn on till at least 11am) but the risk is that we eat it all tonight. Historically speaking, Sim lacks the ability to delay ingestion if the poison is to hand.72.00
2009-10-100.25000 grams$62.5I think I slept about 20 minutes all night, in four five minutes snatches. Knowing there was gear at home stopped me from sleeping, although I'd had a shot a few hours before."Those years of morning shots have ruined me" i commented to S and she agreed. Whilst dealing I used to wake to a pre-mixed shot daily for years, a very strong habit12.58
2009-10-100.20000 grams$50Post bowling. Despite a brekky indulgence, the Sat arvo desire was as strong as ever. Spent all of my grocery and last of S's beans. For a top-up...8.50
2009-10-140.24000 grams$60At last, saw Nads' Will. The last five or six times I tried him, there was so much waiting I went elsewhere. But glad I saw him today, it was far superior to the stuff a la Rich. 50 percent stronger? Still whacked now, 5 hours later. He saw me after only waiting two minutes at Oxley. Excellent service.99.25
2009-10-160.24000 grams$60Fri night, scoring. A week to my short story comp, I have characters but no story. I have gal but no intimacy. A flat but no home. The missing factor? Feelings. Feelings turn flats into homes, gals into galfriends, and info into stories.48.00
2009-10-170.20000 grams$50Not much of a wait, but had to go to Darra. Not so bad. Very strong stuff, it dehydrates a lot. Drank water every few hours last night but still woke feeling rough. S not keen to keep doing it, pushing for Richie. But we save beans doing this - 70 of this is 120 of Richies.20.83
2009-10-180.10000 grams$50An unexpected blat. Always a treat, even when I know I will have to pay for it later. I cannot wipe the smile such an event generates on my dial - sad I know but it is how I am wired. I was doing J's tax, lodgingiit, and he 'happened' to have extra...hmmmm22.67
2009-10-180.20000 grams$50Aaah, a free shot. Well, credit. Thanks jman. I always like an unexpected score. Not great gear, no legs as they say, but it's the thought that counts. S was smiley for a few minutes till she realised it was not my first shot of the day. We haven't spoken since I left her flat a couple of days ago. I will try to hold that strength of will4.50
2009-10-210.24000 grams$60First visit to R since 'recovered memory syndrome' (joking). In a rush, as S' mum is popping in, she is off to hospital 2moro for exploratory surgery. Not half as much fun as the name suggests70.92
2009-10-220.20000 grams$50Took S' bro D out to see Rich. Of course, he thought I was dropping off a flash drive to a friend, and S is too angry to talk about the affair, but I agree with what I did. Shaking things up to see what happens. Sounds childish, but I parked and walked 300m to the meet point, round a couple of corners. If cops were to grab me it would have not involved D.24.25
2009-10-230.07000 grams$50Tried Rich - turned off. Tried Nads - ring back in an hour (which means a 2 or 3 hour wait).Normally I would wait for Nads to get ready, but S' mum is at hers, and is expecting S home at 630 for dinner. So we trooped off to Sly. I petulantly waited outside. Still sore after my last meet with him where he brought up some of my old 'borrowing cash' misdemeanours24.58
2009-10-240.24000 grams$60Getting organised early before I picked up my dad. Luckily I had built a little slip into my schedule, as I ran out of petrol just as R passed me with his instructions to follow him. R drove me to the BP, waited whilst I spent most of my remaining funds on an overpriced petrol can and 5 litres of petrol. Then he dropped me back to the vehicle17.83
2009-10-250.20000 grams$40A little tickety tock, that's what Sundays are about. R too busy to catch up, one of those things, he apologised for not being able to attend in person. But who really wants to rake over teh coals of a painful time?24.33
2009-10-250.10000 grams$0Unexpected call from a miner, with an e not an o. Would've been better a few hours earlier before S and I blew the 80 I earned yesterday doing PC repair work and running out of petrol4.00
2009-10-280.07000 grams$60Aaah, Sly. Why can we not just be customers like any other business transaction. He has now told Sim that if I don't come up on the next visit, we don't get any gear. It's not like we are asking for credit, or that we're people who once robbed him at knifepoint - those are both events that I managed to deal with in my dodgy life- we just want to get in and get out.75.08
2009-10-290.07000 grams$50S made me go up and see Sly. I guess i should thank her. Sly and I made up, not sure if that was coz he needed some accounting help, or if he'd forgotten the issues. Nice to see dq also. Pauly left as I arrived, I came to the tailend of a HIMEM retrospective...22.75
2009-10-290.14000 grams$35So it's funny, but this 70 did more than the 120 before it. Different supplier, different stuff. Rock hard, dirty milky gear.2.00
2009-10-300.24000 grams$60Aaah, shite gear. Why not. Why not have a grumpy runner be rude to you then take 120 bucks and give you something that does nothing. I can't see why not. It's what I did this day...21.75
2009-10-310.10000 grams$25Halves in a fifty, using medicare rebated last-of-my-cash. What more to say than we're broke...21.92
2009-11-040.20000 grams$50Well, a shot I tried to avoid. At least I talked S down from 120 to 100. I did suggest 70 at first, which would have done the job, but given uncertainty re quality we decided to opt for quantity. No need in retrospect but that's no help.97.92
2009-11-060.24000 grams$60Too much almost. V stoned. Nice. Easy peasy.48.00
2009-11-070.20000 grams$50Picked S up from green flea, then off to nads.17.75
2009-11-080.14000 grams$35Oh dear. Off to pares then Beks, S asks me 2 score be I go. Obviously I wouldn't have if part of me didn't want to, but I had not consciously thought of it so was a little pissed.23.83
2009-11-090.14000 grams$35dq's bday. gay bowling at richlands. asked for 30 tick, knocked back. still decent. been lucky lately with nads being on. haven't seen rich for 10 days, rubbish.30.50
2009-11-110.20000 grams$50Bit of a wait, but lucky, as Sly and Rich we unavailable. Got off work 445, got on 645. Over 2 hours. Nads' Will was smart, he never told us to wait more than 45 minutes, he kept us on the hook, never long enough of a delay to give up. But he still managed to make us wait over 2 hours...49.75
2009-11-130.24000 grams$60Friday the thirteenth. Well named, sbs03 died-raid failure.Spent day trying to rebuild, got myself in quite a state.46.33
2009-11-140.24000 grams$60We spend an hour or more waiting for W out at Oxley, then hear from him that he's had some pig trouble...so we go to Slys, he is dumping on Liesle, nasty, she is crying and upset and moving out. Nothing good is in this industry I think21.83
2009-11-150.20000 grams$50Bugger, blowing sim's birthday cash. her idea, she was aware this was birthday money, but i should have been stronger. Now it's another week broke.20.00
2009-11-180.25000 grams$65The eve of Si's birth anniversary, aka birthday. So got a 300, it took 2 hours of relocating - TWG->OXLY->CORINDA. I think he just kept moving us to use up time whilst he prepared...well it worked.Now I just have to hold on to some until after work tomorrow79.08
2009-11-190.20000 grams$50Second bite out of a 300 pack. At nearly 3am, after sitting through New Moon. Not a very good movie, but the audience helped - all teen girls, oohing and aahing at the pretty boys and the heroine's interactions with him8.67
2009-11-190.20000 grams$50Last bite. And I haven't even gotten to work on S's birthday. Morning shots, especially after a 3am shot, left me feeling a little blazed, blurry.4.50
2009-11-190.20000 grams$50S pushes me to ask for tick, in the end, she texts R, he agrees, I meet him. Birthday evening shots. 12.25
2009-11-200.24000 grams$50Can't even afford a 120, even on payday. Paying back a century tick from last night. Paying back 300 borrowed from S on her birthday eve, used to finance a baby binge. Three shots, no four, in 24 hours. Old days returned to but out of phase, unprepared, in the dark.22.00
2009-11-210.14000 grams$35Last beans. S off to family lunch for her bday. Me too. Coffee club - disdained by us alone, suggested by her when with company. Odd. paid half my metro weekly so i could save ten bucks16.67
2009-11-210.20000 grams$50S put in her 50 birthday beans, (I have to repay). She's upset as is usual on family day. We get a century, half on tick. Not great quality, but we're still erking from my binge on her actual birthday two days prior.7.50
2009-11-230.24000 grams$50Asked for a 120, W made it up specially, then charged only 100. A nice, generous act. I was, as S pointed out, in a foul mood. Whether through recognition of S and I as nothing but scoring-buddies, upon who I pin hopeless notions of romance, or whether the futility of scoring and scoring, I don't know. But foul-mooded I was47.83
2009-11-250.17000 grams$50Well, probably a mistake. Ran into Nads' old runner, Manda, at Bi-Fizz, and ended up spending the century on the spot. Same original supplier, but size must have been down. S mentioned this burn 5 times after she told me she would not mention it any more.48.67
2009-11-250.14000 grams$35Aaah, S p'd off at getting ripped by Manda an hour prior. I see it as a necessary risk to widen our range of suppliers. She'd agree if it wasn't her pay I'd say0.75
2009-11-280.20000 grams$50All bought by S. Paying her back yesterday broke me. Walked out on her at 2am, the not getting laid issue, again, and again. At Slys there were 2 suspicious types sitting in a hot car outside his neighbouring flats. I advised him but what can he do? I am afraid he would go away for a long time if caught again, so soon after getting out.64.75
2009-11-290.20000 grams$25fifty granted on tick, noice. But spending everything we have on the stuff. Both of us can see there's a problem. S will push to go get on, then complain after scoring that I spent her electricity money.25.25
2009-12-010.06600 grams$50Synchronised a visit to Sly with S. Late to work, late back from lunch. Woke ill. And a reduction.48.25
2009-12-020.07000 grams$60There was trepidation b4 the event-twas mumbles on the menu. He left as we arrived - no words exchanged, surly lad he is. But worked out well, v strong. S got drowsy and snarky. What more do you want from a lass.28.08
2009-12-030.06600 grams$50Another 60 tick, nice of Sly. But using very regularly. Suggested we try to source some extra metro to get us over this hump, but I guess we'll end up doing it hard and cold as usual24.92
2009-12-040.06600 grams$50S missed out on a Kokeshi doll in an eBay auction. I tried to explain that this happens. She blames me for not bidding enough. I say it's all timing. In retrospect I should have followed her suggestion and let her get defeated so she could see there was no point.23.58
2009-12-050.20000 grams$50Out top FTP to see W. Rubbish stuff. Been a bad few days. Unfortunately the more crud you take the more your desire for something decent strengthens.18.42
2009-12-060.06600 grams$50A long wait. Friday's, payday's, gear did squat. Saturday's was off Nads, it did squat also. Sly cooking, but his was still not ready. Only we had no cash, just transferable cash from bank accounts. saw Sly, no good.26.00
2009-12-070.06600 grams$50Richie was out, word on the street was that his was the business. So off to Sly's. He was a little upset over the old issue of his bro rejecting his parole submission to relocate to Wytalaba. S took about half an hour to hand over the goods, but he has been good every other time so karma dictated patience. 27.75
2009-12-090.07000 grams$60S's payday, off to Sly. Had a day off yesterday, first this month. S unhappy, no aircon at her work. I cannot imagine those conditions. Yet she is not interested in other jobs?47.67
2009-12-100.03330 grams$50Waiting for Sly to arrange a bigger thang - getting parts of it up front.19.33
2009-12-100.06600 grams$50We blow our profit bit by bit, as Sly delivers excuses for delays again and again. I recall that this is a frustrating industry.5.08
2009-12-110.03330 grams$50SO much stress to arrange this thing for Wazza. He was generous though. But Sly took a while to come together - he was depending on mumbles which did not help one iota. However it has departed now and all is over for today19.42
2009-12-110.06600 grams$29.5Mumbles prod, but from Sly. S having larger portion as I ate earlier. She is fuming as I am already stnd and she is not yet - to her this is an imbalance in the Universe - not unlike waking up in the morning and seeing the Moon rise instead of the Sun. I (stoner) grin and bear it.3.25
2009-12-120.14000 grams$35Last cash. S and I sit at bus stop reading, waiting. Bus driver pulls up, we shake our heads - "Have a good read he shouts" and drives off. I realise later that this moment of humanity was what we use gear to hide from.22.25
2009-12-140.24000 grams$60Sly not answering, but S not keen to give him beans due to his yesterday behaviour - delayed us for hours before cancelling, saying "Tomorrow is another day". Infuriating to S.50.83
2009-12-160.24000 grams$60aah, told S last night, again, that soon I was to sleep with another girl. Her reaction is that I am being very weird. Maybe so - normally u tell after the event, if at all. But I am trying to express and warn as much as I can.47.75
2009-12-180.24000 grams$69.6S had her Christmas do, so was in a rush to shop...Richie, who we've been seeing this week, was turned off. Sly's phone rang out. Nads' W was so off the show I could not get sense outta him - after twenty minutes of calling I arranged a meet - I must have first rung him straight after a shot47.92
2009-12-190.24000 grams$50W gave bad news that Beans has Stage 2 cervical cancer. Whilst she's in jail. Life is harsh at times. This made Sim focus on her sore insides. I suggested an anaesthetic for her papsmear. She said she hadn't thought of that, maybe whilst on her next 3 weeks holidays she will get it done.19.08
2009-12-200.05000 grams$40Unexpected. S had Christmas cash. Rings me asking me to take her to score, then demands I pay it all back in a few days. I know she's bleeding but this is rude.26.42
2009-12-250.20000 grams$50Aaah, that Christmas morning shot. S is off to her sisters, driven by her mum. I am off to my pares at dinner.111.58
2009-12-250.10000 grams$50An hour and a half waiting down at Toowong for W. But it is Christmas Day so I consider myself lucky to be able to score at all.13.50
2009-12-260.14200 grams$58A long wait. An unexpected shot. A troubled day. Is all my life to be chasing this dragon? I took all my pay on Thursday with nothing going to bills, yet here I am broke a bit over a day later. Why be trained in financial management if I cannot get past my base human desires?21.08
2009-12-260.10800 grams$42Aaaah, one of those days. Woke with fifty dollars in my pocket, and on the horns of a dilemma. That fifty was the only money we had that would help dq and I camp for a coupla of days. But the dilemma was that I woke junk-free and desirous of her embrace. Drove out to DQs, explained my situation. He did not seem hurt but he does not vocalise his feelings often. This is me having the rest of a hundred pack I bought for S and I. S b=never returned from up north. Texted her sis, no reply.3.08
2010-01-010.24000 grams$50Score once, then again for rach. They didn't have enough to do a 50 for her. Took a 20 tax, bad man I am. 137.17
2010-01-020.24000 grams$50Borrowed 100 off L. Expensive. I get nothing but a small tax, and an additional debt to repay on payday.26.42
2010-01-030.25000 grams$50Got W and W stopped by cops. Lou lending a century, arrived late, I asked W's to wait for her, but when schnarbs turned into their street they panicked and drove off - WITH the cops. D'uh. Cops pulled them over a k later, but just licence and RBT. Ws were pissed at me - well Wayne was, not Will.23.33
2010-01-040.20000 grams$47Wayne a bit pissed after yesterday (I assume), shorted him six bucks, told him it was four bucks, he said 'have you cleared this with W'.27.83
2010-01-050.30000 grams$67.5Bek lent 50. Ta. Expensive week for me though...She repaid a debt to me also.23.25
2010-01-060.24000 grams$50Bek with again. Sad and depressing. And waiting again 24.17
2010-01-070.25000 grams$50An hours wait after work. Expected S to be broke but no. She is finishing up her hols, put dosh in my bank account so I could score. Things not great with my usage at present.23.75
2010-01-080.27000 grams$60Will said wait again, so I went to Rich instead. Helped Joda out. Nice stuff23.75
2010-01-090.25000 grams$50Drove to Mt Tamb to pick up S, drop off her a blat. Was texted by Bek and Louise within one minute of each other at 830am. In synch.16.83
2010-01-090.25000 grams$50On way back from Tambers, I'm keen again already, despite a large blat a few hours ago5.17
2010-01-100.25000 grams$50This was going to be a day off, but I guess I knew there was a chance of some gratis from a gal28.33
2010-01-130.24000 grams$60Will again, stuff not flash. S depressed after I confess to not submitting her Christmas Kokeshi order. I think this upsets her more than a revelation of infidelity would. Strange huh. So I'm off to score again in a minute. One shot just not enough for the kids these days.69.33
2010-01-130.20000 grams$50Seconds. Openly suggested to S that we not do this. She declined my offer.Now she's broke. I'm exhausted3.00
2010-01-150.24000 grams$50Got a 20 tax from shopping for B. Dogs eat dogs. Out to Darra. S said "I didn't feel anything from that gabo at all". Last time we had some, we shopped again an hour later. Expensive, spending $200 in a night.44.75
2010-01-160.03300 grams$50Mitch rang, talked me into seeing Sly before visiting pares. Mistake, as I saw Sly for two shots, using cash in my bank account (internet transfers) and got v stoned. Very strong stuff.19.67
2010-01-160.06600 grams$50Got me another one, and one for S. So stoned, I lost S's but Mitch found it in dirty bin eventually. Smashed I am.0.42
2010-01-170.06600 grams$40Said no to S, but relented after two hours. Was I just being a tosser, wasting time? I like to think I was really trying to resist. That if S had been stronger she would have skipped using. Who knows24.58
2010-01-190.06600 grams$50Shouted by Bek, not "at by". Ha ha. An hour hanging with a debating and befuddled Sly. No fish, it took a threat to shop elsewhere to make him estimate amount by eye. Hate using threats. But the conversation was going nowhere. Two tobacocnists visisted looking for a set, he rang many friends, all on answering machine52.42
2010-01-200.06600 grams$50Aaah, sly 2 days in a row. This will hurt. Especially as I am planning to skip use on Friday. A monumental effort, not made easier if I am hurting. PLus having to fight with S depsite warning her over a week ago already.23.08
2010-01-220.06600 grams$50A big one. Sly will give them well oversize. Prickles from a 50. This is a double-edged sharp though. You get more stoned now, but it bumps you into a using bracket you cannot afford to stay at. Like marrying above your station. So sickness must come49.25
2010-01-230.06600 grams$40Aaah, again. Most of my cash, unless Jfrog repays that 50 I lent him last night. Nearly didn't use last night. Lasted about 4 hours after getting paid. Ran into dealer at S's.19.67
2010-01-260.06600 grams$50Borrowed a century from B. Was happy not to use but was prompted by B. Did not have resistance to say No several times - I just hinted. B went shopping whilst I was at pares. Lots of friends would have withdrawn the offer of a loanonce they found their own source but B did not.71.42
2010-01-280.20000 grams$50Sly delayed for an hour, so we kill some time and waste some cash seeing the Nads. Fresh from Asia but not the power of the home made. Solid rock, but as Jack would say, anyone with a car-jack can make a rock...51.75
2010-01-280.06000 grams$35Second blat. Suggested by me. S said it was my choice, and I did not back down. Silly.Had to wait an hour for Sly as he was out doing stuff. A little talkative he was, to put it mildly.1.42
2010-01-290.06600 grams$50Payday. Mums birthday. I am meant to be at my parents at 530. Instead I am sitting above a lab cooking up my wages in a street spoon. The plan to use after visiting my parents was knocked over by a five word text from S. Willpower. Horrible day. Half hour delay at doctors getting February's metro script.22.58
2010-02-030.24000 grams$50Running late. Sly has nothing. Just saw Nads but he's finished for the night. Spend everything is the motto for my 39th, as it has been all year.123.17
2010-02-040.20000 grams$50Aaah, big run. And more pay tomorrow so it never ends. Somehow B got involved in this shop but messed up and fell asleep, now I am on the run from her. What did I do?21.50
2010-02-050.30000 grams$75Bought a large one - been overdoing it the last few days. S owes Sly 200 from my birthday, so we can only see Nads or Rich (who only turned on this week after a month off...)24.33
2010-02-060.21000 grams$50W didn't have a 120, so got x X 50, which he reckons is bigger...Blowing all beans, the first saturday after I turn 39 - no lessons learnt on my birthday obviously17.83
2010-02-100.20000 grams$50First in a few days - since Sat arvo. Feeling fine - accidental extra takeaway by the chem helped. Went for a walk around 2 blocks this morning, which should indicate the amazing level of health I felt. Gabo just amkes me tired and depressed these days. So why continue?101.00
2010-02-110.25000 grams$45Ten bucks short but received a good sized paper wrapped. I think I got the rest of their book, thanks. Initially arranged to meet at Milton then a minute later he calls back and says Darra. Through peak hour traffic in the city. Back to TWG half an hour after leaving there. Chasing my tail as much as I chase dragons.24.58
2010-02-130.20000 grams$50Out to Salisbury to shop. Then over to JB HiFi Mt Gravatt. Keeps you moving this guy. He was so stoned I barely understoof his directions. No life. Broke again40.75
2010-02-130.06600 grams$40Oh well. Shot from Nads didn't help. S pull sout 80 and says 'let's see Sly'. I get v stressed, S got 200 tick on my birthday eve and never returned. Then more stressed when she tells me she invited Slay and Lsl to movies.2.33
2010-02-150.14000 grams$25Asked for fifty tick, got 20. This was money I wanted to send to dad for rego, but the transfer failed. S suggests blowing it on gear, I goalong52.83
2010-02-160.06600 grams$50loan from B. Sly gave me too much of a cut-perhaps being nice to me, perhaps a mistake. WHatever the motive, it bruned B and S. I feel bad now. S says it's Sly's fault, not to repay B...who knows, so much inter-jealousy and wrangling23.83
2010-02-170.06600 grams$50Purple van full of hippies at Slys. Very low key. S waiting outside my work, I was not expecting her, nearly drove off without her. Broke as usual.24.00
2010-02-200.20000 grams$50Not so hot. Last of cash. But did a nice shop last night, 2 books, 2 cds (Stroke and I Heart Hiroshima) plus shoes from Djs - used a few vouchers. Nice to have stuff, or so I am told. Oh two books also - Stross and Egan short story collections!64.67
2010-02-220.05500 grams$35Five bucks tick. I don't wanna see Will atm, asked for 20 tick yesterday and was told "he couldn't do it". He took 700 off me over the previous wee then couldn't do 20 tick. Rage is useful for me to minimise usage55.67
2010-02-240.06600 grams$50Still skipping Will after his knockback on the twenty tick request.Sly gave me two shirts, short sleeves but fit me well...47.67
2010-02-250.07000 grams$60Well maybe it was a quarter hour or so later, but who doesn't fudge figures from time to time?Finished v late on a worknight trying to get Sly's Belkin up n running.No success but getting there.30.17
2010-02-260.06600 grams$100Paid back a century of tick. Stressing-stayed up v late last night assist Sly with Belkin config.Today-old laptop diagnosis, then fin work and B is on blower stressing @ me to score.Sly has given her an hour wait, so wants me to Q jump.But would be taking food out of my mouth to do this, so it's unlikely17.92
2010-02-270.06600 grams$50Back with vals again.Watching Sopranos. Only seen Nads once in a week, and copped much stress in that short interval.Keep meaning to tell S I want to spend more time alone, but never pronounce the words.21.83
2010-03-010.14000 grams$35Sly off, used laptop beans to see Rich for the first time in a while. Fought with S about usage-I'm down to 12.5mg today and want to minimise usage. But I broke in the end, which is what counts.52.67
2010-03-030.06600 grams$100Repaid a century tick to Sly, who was in a bad but not foul mood. Upset that I let Bek use my phone to call him. But upset in general, wanting to stir. Just shopped and got out. S chatted with Lil John. We tried Rich first but no joy, and no returned call-unusual.45.58
2010-03-050.06600 grams$50Adding this a fortnight later so the details hazy.47.75
2010-03-060.03300 grams$50Sat morn. S at work. Sly makes me wait a couple of hours as he gets ready.16.83
2010-03-060.06600 grams$50I go to grab more for me and S's for later. I get too trashed and put S's in my pocket, spill it all. Zaniness.3.00
2010-03-060.20000 grams$45More we want. Insatiable desires.3.00
2010-03-070.06600 grams$35Sunday again. S admits she's 'gone crazy' with gabo the last few months. Not sure if that's a prelude to improvement or a cry as we slide into the maw.Despite all my extra PC work earnings last week I am broke again.22.92
2010-03-090.06800 grams$50Paid for a PC job.60% went to gear, the rest to food and a phone bill. Not terrible, not great. Must try to lean towards the great in future. Shopped for L, just a 5, but every bit helps50.08
2010-03-100.06600 grams$46Pushed to start reducing gear in addition to metro. Asked S to get an 80 and give me 30, she have 50. In the end, she got 100 and split it pretty evenly, giving herself 4 more units than I..maybe I had 45% but it's a step towards less. On this low metro dose I get pretty trashed on 50, so don't need as much.24.25
2010-03-110.06600 grams$50S had the day off, and had Sly drop around. Saved me a trip to Lutters. S told me I was in a strange mood, which was true. I left soon after getting to hers, then came back for dinner and left again after 30 minutes. 23.83
2010-03-110.04000 grams$50L had texted at lunch looking to cop. S would not participate unless paid a crispy up front (as L's sis Sal charges we believe). I shopped for her seven or so hours later, in exchange for 20% tax and borrowed dosh. Selling myself cheaply I know.2.58
2010-03-120.18000 grams$40.5Trying to cit down, and to avoid the drama that is Sly shopping, we saw Rich. Unfortunate. S is off up the mountain with her mum tonight for a few days.21.17
2010-03-120.18000 grams$45Rest of earlier stuff. Still bad.0.92
2010-03-130.03300 grams$35Saturday morning on my own. Tried to skip blatting.Did chem, green flea for veg (got overcharged), waved to Louis Pav as he leered and circled a new gal on Vulture.Then pow, to Sly, destiny18.83
2010-03-150.06600 grams$22.5Tough day. Toughest in recent memory. Woke at 2am and never got back to sleep. 36 hours after last shot. Spent day at work twisting sore muscles, waiting for after work and the score. Bad sign. Low metro and maybe I dropped too fast.52.17
2010-03-170.06000 grams$40A little success amongst a larger failure. Used, but went 60/40 with S. 50 knocks me around too much, I feel, at this low metro dose. V rough day but not as bad as Monday.48.17
2010-03-180.06600 grams$50Aaah, a designated 'non-using day' if ever there was such a thing. But B wants some gear, worries that S won't sell, so drags ol' me into it, I catch the bug and I end up using more than I do when I plan to use.24.00
2010-03-180.03300 grams$25This is the last third of that point. S had her whole 0.05 in one go, I had mine in 2 bits. I end up chatty and loopy due to my low metro dose. B and S take it in their stride. I guess they should be jealous?2.17
2010-03-190.06600 grams$40Not sure what I got, in retrospect, but this is about right.21.92
2010-03-200.04500 grams$30Somehow a very demeaning event. Scoring on Sly's birthday, getting tick perhaps from him. I did not enquire if we were granted any largesse above the sixty I put on the table. Finally his TPG connection is working. I cannot stand to go to that house again but fear I will again and again.22.17
2010-03-240.04600 grams$28Reduced shot size, in a bid to minimise my pain when I go clean again. Such a low metro dose - I don't need crispies anymore.97.67
2010-03-250.06600 grams$50Boy was I tired. Worked on a PC image out at our DR site. Then back to work and struggled with a sluggish switch for an hour after work finished. Then out to Coopers Plains n thump and tried to decipher an embedded SATA raid msgs26.92
2010-03-260.04500 grams$37.5Lent Bek 75. She got quite stressed when my phone went off for an hour as I shopped. S came up to her house, all suss, after I went up to see B. I think she was checking up on me.21.25
2010-03-270.06000 grams$40Shopping for L. Four day binge, hope I don't get as sick over next few days as I did last week. But last week I had a couple of two shot days.17.92
2010-03-280.06600 grams$45Tickety tock. S's idea to shop today. I had just filled a val scrip and could have skipped using. Especially with a 20% reduction to my metro due Wednesday. But this box of vals may help. Last Sunday I avoided Sim all day and didn't use. Lessons....27.25
2010-03-300.06600 grams$50Off to the Pixies (Not away with the fairies, no - thanks to my mum for that particular joke). B came through with some owed but not expected just yet cash, so I could score. Serendipity?51.00
2010-03-310.06600 grams$41And on and on and on. 8 days in a row. Not a good pattern with a big metro reduction coming up tomorrow. Looks like I'll need to spend Easter in penury and pain. 'EVry day repeats' is a line from a song that comes to mind.23.75
2010-04-020.12000 grams$50Good Friday. Dropped to 10mg 'done. Moan away at sis. Couldn't move till I scored, couldn't score till 4pm. Bek told me the other day 'she cannot function any more' what does that mean? Who can function any more?47.50
2010-04-030.06600 grams$60L helps out. Score on way up north, drive sleepy. Mega cops they say but I have no problems.19.75
2010-04-040.05000 grams$30Drove back from Ninderry, with S. Engaged well with the kids (T and S), perhaps low metro dose? Perhaps high gabo dose before arrival? Falling asleep all way up on 1.5 hour drive. Dangerous. Playing life lottery. I win again.24.00
2010-04-060.05000 grams$28.7First day back at work post Easter. Strong stuff. Pantry moths have the run of my kitchen cupboards. Little things in life can be v depressing. Took a lot of extra metro to get through today, 90% of my stashes, and I ended up using anyway. Durnit.54.08
2010-04-070.05500 grams$40Worked a little late, S got to Sly's first, I met her there and waited for Sly to arrive. Not long after h earrived, his proto-family arrived and off we hurried.24.33
2010-04-080.05000 grams$35Hazy on the details, but I know we shopped this day.23.42
2010-04-090.06600 grams$40Paydays. Daylight saving has made it come in a little earlier.24.08
2010-04-100.07500 grams$28I spend my last fifty, S her last 20. We score. Saturday morning as ever.18.92
2010-04-100.03300 grams$50Tickety tock. Thanks Sly. Off to PR's party at Lutwyche. DQ spends around $150 extra (above his usual cripsy) and I spend $50 extra. We both sit silently ona sofa for two hours.7.67
2010-04-120.05000 grams$33.75Sim asked for tick. Sly goes away two days. I had near 48 hours off. Bit sick this morn but better by the time I scored, as usual45.33
2010-04-140.20000 grams$50What a stressful day. sly told us he was going away for two days (which could well mean four or five) on Monday. SO with payday today, we had nowhere organised. And S and I hadn't talked for two days since some honestish texts Monday night. Amazingly, right on 4:30PM Rich turned on48.25
2010-04-150.20000 grams$50What a day. A cheque (a rare occurrence for me) cleared, I paid work 300 for Sim's airfare next week, then started to try scoring. From 11am, Sly and Rich's phones were on. Long story short, I ended up getting on just after 8pm.26.50
2010-04-160.20000 grams$45R off until about 5pm. Then by the time we get to see him, he has sold his last thingy. DQ misses out. Crazy. Turn on and sell everything in just twenty minutes trading. A perfect business:customers happy to have to ring every ten minutes all day, then hand over most of their salary for a speck of what could be glucose. Insanity can be made to turn a profit if you're smart enough.21.33
2010-04-160.05000 grams$20Had trouble holding on to this century of Bek's. S started pushing to use it a couple of hours back when I mentioned B was coming around for it. Especially as Sly and Rich have not been available before 6pm the last two days (Sly not at all). I could say I've taken the karma view that what goes around comes around, but then I just took 1/4 of Bek's shot for myself, none to S..4.67
2010-04-170.06600 grams$40Sly is back from depression and down south. They go hand in hand perhaps. After a few days of shopping through some v unreliable sources we now can just rock up and shop. Perhaps too easy, as S pointed out. But it removes the obsessive behaviour - reinging a phone every six minutes for eight hours until someone deigns to answer...13.33
2010-04-170.14000 grams$28To top up Slys we see Rich. It feels like it does nothing but I gues sit does.7.00
2010-04-180.05000 grams$35Blew money put into new CBA savings. Out of control. Low metro dose equates to no willpower.18.92
2010-04-190.06600 grams$50Oh dear. Perhaps I am not coping with this lowered metro level. Scoring today. Basically any cent that is not secured goes in gear. Whereas on 30mg of metro I could save a little, resist a little, now I cannot.27.75
2010-04-210.06600 grams$46Rough day. Did not use yesterday, and had drunk all metro for today, plus another half dose I had stashed, still twitching and off-colour all day. Usually I get a little relief from illness, nothing today.48.17
2010-04-220.20000 grams$50B scored for me, just as well, as Sly never got things together b4 we jetted off to ADLD. I developed separation anxiety at 5pm and tried desperately to arrange more gear. 10mg metro has me thinking in very tight circles.23.00
2010-04-250.07000 grams$36Oversized. Back from ADLD. Keen to score. Arranged this from down there, and Sly overly generous.79.42
2010-04-260.05000 grams$32Back from Ad.S seems to have been underdosed by chem - a bottle never given. No point arguing with Peel, they will not trust a junkie, and will not act until they get corroboration. Which will be tomorrow, too late to do any good. It is not a great system. So I pull out all my savings funds and ring Sly. 14.92
2010-04-270.05500 grams$30Developed a sudden cold in the afternoon. Had resolved not to use but the cold plus S's talk of getting tick pushed me over the edge...S seemed pissed at me, most likely from my dry behaviour in Adelaide. Telling her I had changed my mind on bringing her along, but too late to cancel tickets. Uh oh.27.58
2010-04-280.05000 grams$30.1Woke with a cold, one that developed yesterday after lunch. Went in to work just after 10. My boss, S, made me work late, till 515, to fix a minor email issue that I was going to fix by remote. I guess I was being punished for being sick. Gabo helped the cold a little but not much23.92
2010-04-290.05000 grams$28Last of S's cash. Using and using.23.58
2010-04-300.06600 grams$43Paid 20 tick back. S has caught my cold. I am just getting over it. The circle of life.23.58
2010-05-020.20000 grams$50Tried Sly for four hours, maybe three. See Rich in the end. After I have called Rich and am awaiting him to turn up, Sly rings and says his phone has been on silent.45.08
2010-05-050.20000 grams$38S and I agreed we would try to skip Sly if poss. So went for a century out at Mt Grav rather than a 70 from the usual. Why is that? Perhaps less stress, definitely less rigmarole and play-acting75.17
2010-05-050.05000 grams$35Second shot for the night. Bad juju. This could end up in a five day binge with no metro at the end.2.58
2010-05-060.05000 grams$28Didn't want to today. S rang. No matter how much she will agree the night before that she won't score the next night, here it is and she'll organise tick. For me to pay.21.58
2010-05-070.06600 grams$38Big day tomorrow. In a bad spot with using. I used last night and was sick today, even after my metro. My best chance is that the metro reduction is what hurts, not the baby habit. But hard to tell. All I can do is use as little as I can.23.75
2010-05-080.02300 grams$30Saturday morning wake up, before ute driving. S reckoned I would not need gear. She has just rung to see if she could hear gear in my voice.14.83
2010-05-080.06600 grams$43Sim pissed at me for having 20 this morning and none for her. I lied about the shot until an hour ago. To admit it I would have lost the gear, at least half. Sim went out to Luttie to pick up this century (she put in 20 bucks of her own). She asked if I was going to give her half of my shot in repayment for this morning.7.83
2010-05-090.05000 grams$29.4Meant to have a day off, but no. Bought visiting brotehr of Sim, Dave, brekky at Sth Bank. $34 of my fifty, thought that may stop me using. But no, tick was gained, strength lost.21.33
2010-05-110.05000 grams$28All tick. But Mitch needed me to grab a century for him so not turning up empty handed. I get pretty keen on the second day after a shot. Yesterday I went without despite Sim's weak pleadings. I guess I almost double dosed yesterday...52.00
2010-05-120.05000 grams$28Paid back some tick, Sim did. Took a while to get on to Sly, tried Rich but he was out.24.25
2010-05-130.05000 grams$32Not sure if we are being given 70s or centuries. Sly v generous, but makes it hard to track usage. Gave Mitch a lift to his place from Sly's.23.83
2010-05-140.06600 grams$40After work, Bek freaking as she can't get on. I grab hers and get some tick owed to me. All ogod, all sad.24.00
2010-05-150.06600 grams$40Aaah, Saturdays. Pavlovian behaviour. Nothing to say.17.83
2010-05-160.05000 grams$35Got thirty tick.Last of my cash. Carrying a minor habit, no denying it. Even before I have today's shot I am worrying how I will get through Monday and Tuesday with no cash. That, to me, is indicative of carrying a habit. also, S went 50 50 with me, nice.28.92
2010-05-170.05000 grams$28Habit. Born of boredom, it has a valid life of its own. Trying to raise $20 to get some extra metro tomorrow, who knows. These beasts are best snuffed out young.25.00
2010-05-190.05000 grams$35First of two. On top of extra metro.48.17
2010-05-190.05000 grams$35Second shot on the day I double or triple dose. Stoopid. Sim 'didn't feel the first one'. We both have baby habits, I don't think she's ready to admit it is all.1.08
2010-05-200.06600 grams$50Shopping for a miner. With an e not an o thankfully. Generous in his purchases, this bag cost zero.22.67
2010-05-200.05000 grams$27.75This was a tax taken. Crazy. So much stress in doing a little deal. Helped him have a blat too for safety (health safety not cop safety)1.33
2010-05-210.06600 grams$40Again with the scoring on payday. Ho hum. I could argued that I was pressured into it by S & B, but in the end I made the choice. I thought taking ownership of my addiction I may help fight it, but this is a crock, at least in my case.22.92
2010-05-220.06600 grams$50Plan to stop, never effect plans.18.25
2010-05-230.03300 grams$50Had some cash that I try to save for holidays, emergencies etc. In no way was I pressured to score by S, as I walked out of hers at 9 this morning and never spoke to her again. So this is on my won back, out of funds I didn't have.30.00
2010-05-250.05000 grams$35Did not use yesterday. Made conscious choice to use today. Who can say - if I had a little more metro I may have not used today. Who knows? At this tiny metro dose, I have been unable to go two days without using. 49.92
2010-05-260.05000 grams$28ah, silliness. two days in a row with no metro backup. Well, i did half dose with my takeaway today, but that won't be enough. Storm clouds gather!22.08
2010-05-290.06600 grams$35Given a century for 70, perhaps because I said 'make it your best 70', in imitation of old Mal. But I didn't need more, I just said it as S seemed edgy, perhaps.67.50
2010-05-300.06000 grams$31.5Once again I spend the $50 in my CBA savings account that I have put aside for holidays. What am I going to do when holidays appear?22.50
2010-05-300.05000 grams$35First shot did not seem to do squat. This one knocked me onto my derrier. Played a new card game, 41, for a few hours. Sly organised this social event, every Sunday arvo it's meant to be.1.33
2010-06-010.05000 grams$31.5Okay, so twenty years passed by and I'm still using, no prizes for the cynics nodding, smiling. Sick on this low metro dose, unable to bring myself to (again) increase it to sedation level. Need time off, time away.52.67
2010-06-020.06600 grams$45Nearly jinxed it by saying we'd been lucky with S** lately, no waiting, no delays. So he asked us to wait an hour when S got through seconds after I said this. But she wheedled him down to 'come round now'. I guess we ate into his stash24.08
2010-06-030.06600 grams$40Spend spend spend. No metro to buy me a break. When to get sick?23.92
2010-06-040.06600 grams$50Payday, Friday.23.75
2010-06-050.06600 grams$43.2Last of my beans. Habit running now, no denying.I am sick by 5pm each day, 5 hours after dosing. No sources of extra metro.19.33
2010-06-060.06600 grams$50Tickety tock. I score for S who is selling headbands at a stall in teh city.22.92
2010-06-060.06600 grams$50More tick. Second shot for the day, halves in second hundred. S sold at markets in KGS, but only made $25 and so was depressed n bleeding. Great recipe for sobriety5.33
2010-06-070.06600 grams$50No doubt about it. I drink all my prescribed metro, plus another 25%, and by after work I am still sick. Needing to score. Sly being a bit of a prk to Bek over tick, when S and I are asking for ten times as much - I think he was giving a lesson to SIma nd me.24.75
2010-06-080.03300 grams$50Thin edge of the wedge, as dq says. Running out of work to score. Cannot source extra metro, too sick to work.Obviously I justified it to myself as we all do, but I will need ot see doc later this week to increase dose. And get sick over long weekend. Joy16.83
2010-06-080.06600 grams$40Second for the day. With no extra metro I am organising a reducing program.7.00
2010-06-100.06600 grams$40Accepted that I have habit. Doc tomorrow to double metro. Hope that's enough.48.00
2010-06-110.06600 grams$40Last day of use for a bit I hope. Quadrupling dose tomorrow, for two days, then down to just double my present 7.5, I hope this gets me out of this funk.23.42
2010-06-120.06600 grams$50First day at big metro dose - 30mg, quadruple my usual 7.5 - so why am I using? And why do I use twice? I have a habit at this point, and it has psychological hooks in addition to the physical ones. Metro handles the physical hooks, not the ones in your noggin though.22.92
2010-06-130.06600 grams$28Silly. Cue self-loathing. Well dosed with metro so no need to do this. Entirely Sim's push, she had double metro but did not take it, instead letting sickness and need build to where she used. This is logic of a kind, gabo beats metro hands down in terms of effect.22.08
2010-06-160.06600 grams$50Big hoo ha. My car died yesterday at lunch. Sly told Sim not to go to his as he would be at EB, so she went home. When she rang Sly re his non-appearance, he said he'd never left. No car means two hour roundtrip bussing. Sim v angry. I did not support as I was angry re using when I've increased metro last Sat (12/6/10)77.92
2010-06-170.06600 grams$40Sim got 30 tick. She stayed home sick (boss Leanne said 'So you're not coming in because you stayed up late last night')-boss is a bit of a b^&%$.So S went n scored, I used 2 days in a row, payday tomorrow makes three.Told S I won't use on weekend, see what happens.21.33
2010-06-180.08000 grams$50Shopped for L, enabling us to get more thanusual. I was v trashed as a result, but was able to meet L's friend, Scott.Vaguely familiar, I did mention that I hoped he was not a cop. L a little shocked by said statement but it was nothing teh ROms did not regularly expose me to.26.50
2010-06-190.06600 grams$50Ah, weakness. What velvet touch you issue your encrypted keys with, forcing acceptance. Had trouble driving back from his. On the ICB I was fighting to stay awake. With S there I managed to do it. Alone, another statistic was in the making. Although we are all statistics of one sort or another. Survivors post usage is statistical as much as ODs are.21.42
2010-06-200.06600 grams$35Sly topped a 70 up to 100. Nice thought, but it actually works counter to my goals.19.33
2010-06-210.25000 grams$50Resisted the urge to the point where we were no longer thinking about scoring. We both took 5mg Vals and extra metro. Then L rang with cash. Sly phone off, dq tells me he was EMI, so Rich it was.31.92
2010-06-220.06600 grams$50Ah well, an unbroken run of 8 days now - not sure if my increased metro will help any. 'Help any' - one of those modern phrases that mean little. Somehow I confuse scoring with an act of love. A romantic dedication to a fellow human.20.75
2010-06-230.22000 grams$50No Sly, so out to Holland Pk or Mt Grav, for this stuff. Low quality, big size. Long waits in petrol station sunder buzzing fluoro lamps24.67
2010-06-230.05000 grams$35Second shot. Sly off when we first tried - he was not ready for another hour.We think we may be in his bad books, for S flaring up at him last week.3.17
2010-06-250.25000 grams$60Scary. Finished work, payday, and started organising to score (all as usual). Sim rang Sly, then rang me to say she could not understand him but it sounded like he said we shouldn't come over. I rang and got a heavily sedated Sly saying the same. No ingredients, no gabo. A dozen of us waiting like goons on a cancer patient. Dependency is brought into sharp relief47.42
2010-06-260.05000 grams$35Nothing the night before, I;m up watching The Aviator and on Facebook, Sly IMs me and says come over. Stupidly I do. Different quality, grey and crunchy. But does teh job, eh.11.25
2010-06-260.05500 grams$35Shopped for Lu. Borrowed again. Not good, less than 24 hours post pay, I am borrowing against the next week's pay. But I cannot say no6.83
2010-06-270.05000 grams$35All Sunday we don't use. Well, we try from 3pm onwards, but never get on. We split, I go home, then Dani rings me at home and tells me Sly is just about ready. So I go over with fifty Bek has repaid me today and get some bad stuff.29.08
2010-06-290.05000 grams$35S got their first, I had said 'no' but in a weak way, so I ended up using. A day off means a day definitely on, at present.45.67
2010-06-300.05000 grams$35Sly was EMI, but 'saved' this much for us. Didn't stop him having a nice fat line, but to the victor go the spoils. Not a great visit, Sly down, realising the emptiness of the relationships junk-dealing generates.24.00
2010-07-010.06660 grams$50Tickety tock. Sly running EMI as ever.24.00
2010-07-020.03300 grams$50By myself. Lonesome blatting. Miss S oop north at her sis, watching the Twilight:Eclipse debut. I try to resist using (on my payday, I know!) - it's an effort just to keep the steering wheel straight ahead as I pass Hale St ICB turnoff that heads to Slys. I got home w/o scoring...25.92
2010-07-030.08000 grams$50Off to pick up Miss S from the WoolyWin train station. Held out last night till around 730 or 8pm. Not great, not bad. In between. Average.15.25
2010-07-040.05000 grams$35Well, at least we're down to 70s. I said to S 'I don't want to use today'. But she arranged tick, and needed a lift, so i went, I sued. Vini Vedi Vici. Poor excuses, even as I write them I know I am wasting my keystrokes. Just say no is as lame as it was the first day I hard it, and as powerful as it was that same day.25.33
2010-07-060.66000 grams$37.5Sometimes you fall prey to thinking that there's a malevolent force pushing you to use. I got home, I resisted Sim's requests, I watched TV, then Lu rang. I did not answer, I texted and pushed her to Sim, which is not really a no is it?54.92
2010-07-070.07000 grams$35Shopped for L, meant to play cards at Slys but he wasn't into it. Using too much.22.50
2010-07-070.03300 grams$23.5The profits of an earlier shop. Every cent earned goes around and back into the bottomless mouth. No beans for food, on S's payday.2.42
2010-07-100.07200 grams$50Oversized, I was being asked to guinea pig it. Not a smart move when considered from an external, straight, try-to-live-till-you're-fifty view. But I did it, I survived, I got a little more gear than usual..As the song playing right now says (The Drones) - 'Everyone's got their price, most just go a little cheap'59.92
2010-07-100.03300 grams$25Hoping to get this one for free, we'll see. Told S, (truthfully) that the first half of a century did not hit the spot exactly. I was being honest, I should not have been looking for more gear ten minutes after my last blat,0.08
2010-07-110.06000 grams$31.5Oversized. So nearly got through today w/o using. I took extra metro, vals, had a positive attitude, told Sim not to contact me if she got through to Sly. But she did, and I weakened, and scored. All I can do is be stronger.37.33
2010-07-120.05000 grams$35Tickety tock. Depressing. This visit sunk me so low I promised S I would not see her for a while. I spent an hour listening to Sly waffle crud re computers, as L gave Sim clothes of dodgy origin. This is not a slur against the people, just an indication of how horrible this life can be.20.50
2010-07-150.05000 grams$35Here we are again, using on all the days bar Monday.72.33
2010-07-160.06600 grams$50Pay back a century tick, no work at Coopers to do tonight. First night off in a few.23.42
2010-07-170.06600 grams$38.7Busy weekend. Managed to leave coopers plains client with internet working, then found out it only works for the first page - all links fail - weird. Sonicwall config issue. 20.25
2010-07-180.05000 grams$20Big drive. 600k to Stanthorpe and back. V tired. Peter A staying over as we speak. Big fight with S over me not crossing road to CBA ATM at Lutwyche...27.17
2010-07-200.03300 grams$25Have a IT job to be at at 7pm. Sly off chocks and putting us off.dq turns up in the end and has a crispy he offers us. so we get our century in 2 bits49.08
2010-07-200.05000 grams$35Shopping for Lu, late for work, shot split into two.0.58
2010-07-210.07000 grams$55Sly slipped a little extra into mine, as S and I had to do separate spoons - no cleans, so dug deep in teh bin and found marked dirties. Charming, eh?23.17
2010-07-220.05000 grams$35Crummy. Did nowt, as Yorkshiremen say. Sim got uppity at Sly as she was running to him on a lunch break. He had a chunk which would easily have covered what we needed, he snorted that and started cooking some more for her. Perhaps he did this deliberately, perhaps not.19.83
2010-07-220.07400 grams$50Later on, after playing like a madman with my nephii and niece, burning gabo-fuelled energy. Hunted scrub-chickens (which Josua ended up learning to call scrub turkeys) by several methods - trap, pouncing and digging a pit, plus good old-fashioned running after them. Had to wait 30 minutes tonight for Sly to cook up my order.7.33
2010-07-230.38000 grams$75So a lucky score. Rang Sly at 4:30 - 'Ring me in an hour'. I have dinner with family and ring at 7:30 - 'Anomalies, ring me tomorrow morning'. The next day the phone never answered, nor the next till night-time. Luckily this Fri night I rang Rich, hammered despite it being off, and was first caller at 7:30 when it rang. Better than any radio call-in competition. Rich said he'd be there in ten minutes (after an hour's wait), and took another thirty.23.83
2010-07-250.25000 grams$84So we end up scoring. 120 for the q, 20 for the intermediate scorer, 10 for the hander-over-er. And it turns out, against all expectations, to be nice. Strong yellow when mixed. Came from Wynnum, through a friend of a friend. Good on D for thinking ahead and snarfing his number.41.25
2010-07-250.06600 grams$50Horrible weekend. So dependent on Sly - when he goes fritzy, a passel of us suffer.He's kind of like an air filter on the first Moon Base fifty years from now. We all txt and ring each other in panic, and hammer his phone (which is on but unanswered) constantly. He ends up ringing me.6.17
2010-07-260.06600 grams$50Horrible, just horrible. A day at the museum, lovely, with nephew and nice niece. Then pick up S, score, fighting over a boot purchase. She was stoned and choosing shoes in a shop trying to close, I walked out.20.75
2010-07-270.07000 grams$45A big one. Spent the day at Seaworld courtesy of my sister. My mind cannot comprehend a day where I could pull $324 from my wallet to entertain 6 people at Seaworld. I have strayed far from the norm...24.33
2010-07-280.06600 grams$50Sim's payday. Sly not there when we arrive. Me running late for dinner with my sister and her family. Stress makes the gabo less powerful. Gabo reinforces the loneliness inherent.24.50
2010-07-290.07200 grams$45Bad day. Been using since Sat. And after this hot I go to my mum dad sis, bro in law and neph and niece, late, and am stoned. Low point23.83
2010-07-310.06600 grams$50Nasty day. End things with S, or do I? Go to green flea, doc for metro, ma to kenmore toy hire, then score. Drop a packet to Sim and she freaks. I end up saying 'I just want you to getout of the car', feeling nothing. Upset at my sis's recent visit and my interpretation of her treatment of them as assets not kids.43.00
2010-07-310.03000 grams$40Spent a few hours fixing Slys PC. Think it's a burnt out component.No assembly errs. Cannot get to POST, so I think hardware issues.2.75
2010-08-010.03300 grams$50I go after an invite to play cards. No cards eventuates. Stoners stand around stoned. Or sit, rather. Or slumber, more accurately.23.00
2010-08-010.03300 grams$50Lu wanted some. I got tick, brought home and waited a while, as I had eaten earlier.5.17
2010-08-020.06600 grams$50Again, failure. S asks if I want to go score with her. I say no. She says I cannot pass on this one. I go, thinking she is going to buy me some. She gets tick, which I could have done alone.22.17
2010-08-030.06600 grams$50Again. Sim spends her electricity money I gave her last week. She offers softness as she realises I have drifted off course. Today I do not bite.24.08
2010-08-040.06600 grams$50Same time every day. But now I have a habit. A few weeks ago I could take a partial dose when I knew I was using and be fine. Now I drink the entire dose, and still feel antsy by the time I use. Must give it a skip this weekend if I can. Been on every day for a fortnight, plus a couple of two shot days.24.00
2010-08-060.37000 grams$75Sly shopping for PCs, Sim on a clock for the Valentino exhibit, so I choose a choice and head to Mt Grav rather than wait for consumer-fever to break. Bad choice, perhaps, as it's gridlock out there. As I arrive there Sly rings to say he's crossing teh Story on teh way home. Perhaps he fibs.48.25
2010-08-070.06600 grams$50ah, the day after payday and no cash. Cold with Sim, she treated me bad a week ago today, presumptions piled upon assumptions and taking-for-granteds. She is now, a week later, touching and hugging much more than usual.17.75
2010-08-090.07000 grams$40Aaah, many days non-stop. Woke sick, drank nearly all my metro by lunch. You only do that if you know you have more gear lined up.54.17
2010-08-100.06600 grams$50Asked for a century tick. However I sell it, we cannot afford to use seven days a week, which is what we are doing at present. 23.92
2010-08-110.06800 grams$50A standard century, the second day in a row. Yesterday was a penalty for asking for tick, today, I think, just as it was Sly's second day speeding. Personality change, what? Anyway, we are living beyond our means, so it is understandable we start to face the music...18.08
2010-08-110.06600 grams$50Same time every day, even when it's Ekka holiday. Pavloc's dogs are barking. Second shot for teh day, spending S's electricity bill cash...6.00
2010-08-120.06600 grams$50Another century. No crud mixed in today, straight pure. Nice. The crud (perhaps) has resulted in mild anxiety attacks this last week - had a nasty one during Inception last Sat. Had to focus purely on breathing. Perhaps teh shorter half-life of crud, or perhaps it's just teh change away from pure, who knows.23.50
2010-08-130.06600 grams$50So we plan to abstain this weekend. That's the excuse for two shots tonight.24.25
2010-08-130.04400 grams$35Second shot, to 'discourage' use tomorrow.Turned out to be a failure.2.17
2010-08-140.06600 grams$50Tick, again. Skitzed out at Moan - I didn't want to use, she suggests, says 'how much can u put in' - I say forty, we turn up at Slys, Moan pulls out...Forty! She had nothing. I gave gehr 350 yesterday from my pay, over half...18.42
2010-08-160.06000 grams$25Twenty tick. My usage I guess, blew last of funds in SCUL account. S rang, ahunting first, but I'd moved the funds by then. 52.00
2010-08-180.06600 grams$50Nice one. Purchased and prepped for my good self by the other good self, Her. She had arranged to finish work at 2pm so she could spend time with her mother. The plan also included myself going to Slys and scoring , after that I was to drop a prepped warp to our agreed upon stash spot (not going to publish that one here!). But the immense and yawning chasm of time that separated her finishing work and her getting home after doing the dinner with her mum...that was too much. 47.00
2010-08-240.04400 grams$20Sly getting tough on tick.We had 40 beans, Sly said he only had 50, upped to70, paid 40. Tempted to remind I provided free product to him several years. But that is such a small thing to do and say.144.50
2010-08-250.06600 grams$50Aaah, shots during work, the eternal question. Made the rest of the day race by, worked an hour late, chatted and yabbered all arvo....think I earned about $10 more than I spent on gear all up. Balancing, balancing, on this tightrope wire.19.58
2010-08-260.07000 grams$40Borrowed 120 from Bek. Went to Machine Translations at the Troubadour, they were good. Support band was very Arcade Fire-esque - Mosman Alder was their name. Their harmonies were a bit out. But more were there to see them than the main act. J Walker of MT got a blood nose during the gig, asked for a tissue - I missed my chance! Another groupie got up there with a tissue.28.42
2010-08-270.06600 grams$50Deary deary. S fights over my refusal to intro her to my pares. I refuse based on her non-involvement in the carnal arts - I take this as a sign of non-commitment. Managed to get Sim to shop for me - I still had to drive to Lutty to pick her up, so not much saving given she had a day off. I don't expect much, so am not disappointed.23.67
2010-08-280.06600 grams$50First of two.19.50
2010-08-280.03300 grams$0Shouted by Sly. Thanks. Small though, but free gabo is free gabo.0.50
2010-08-310.06600 grams$47Bit of a wait. Gal booked some tick up mid arvo - she was meant to meet him in town, but that never eventuated. dq got the century intended for us, but that's not dq's fault.boy did't turn his phone on so jet n michelle were hamemring me to pass on msgs. All in all, a good reminder of what I haven't missed in teh last two days off.78.33
2010-09-010.06600 grams$50Yesterdays was stronger. Something to do with acetylisation. As the gear ramps up my personal life ramps down. Speeding and parking tickets this week = $400. Anne disses me at work, 'we have to talk'.Moan seems over me. Time to withdraw, internalise. Serepax here I come. Usual response to pressure, dope.22.33
2010-09-020.06600 grams$50Oh dear. Did not want to use today. But finding myself with no defenses to minor attacks at work. Weepy I'd describe myself as. Carrie said my website house design was 'childish' and 'unprofessional' . And Anne had a go the other day. Concerted mother/daughter attacks?23.83
2010-09-050.25000 grams$50Waste of cash. Lou wanted to shop and be done by three. Sly needed 'another hour' at 2:20pm...so we went with Rich. The only benefit is that he came to Stones Corner, so we only wasted cash on gear, not on gear and petrol. 68.50
2010-09-050.05000 grams$37.5Tickety tock. Saw Rich an hour ago, as usual, like Chinese food you want something decent an hour later...1.17
2010-09-070.05000 grams$25Shopped for Matt-fresh outta lockup. Sad - I'd be very angry if I was in his position, nine years lost for a futile law. War on drugs is as futile as teh war on terror, and young men give up their lives for both.49.92
2010-09-080.06600 grams$75Moan paid back 50 tick from her own pay, a good move. My Expo 86 Wolf Parade CD arrived from SubPop. Moan cranky with me, I think because I hung out with Bek. Bleeding, nasty texts, hints about love dying. Sad.24.92
2010-09-090.07500 grams$37.5S reckons her metro was water. She has been in a bad mood for five days now, when I questioned this statement she became angry.18.83
2010-09-110.06600 grams$50running v late for pares. Borrowed beans form B for this...47.92
2010-09-120.06600 grams$45more tick. spending much faster than earning. this turns the mind to criminal activities. fraud, lockpicking, xbox modding, just three of the ideas i've pondered on today, and all to furtehr the acquisition of gabo.27.75
2010-09-140.06600 grams$5040 cash, rest tickety tock. I'm in my 'pissed off with S re no bonking' seasonal cycle. I cannot find words to enunciate clearly what pisses me off. Have to do this to be a real person I guess. Dammit!49.25
2010-09-150.06600 grams$44Moan paid back an extra 40 today. On way to pares. Sly made it extra big, he must be doing pretty well. More power to him.23.67
2010-09-180.06600 grams$50Wazz in town. Saw dad just before, drove him around a bit, S headed over to there while I finished up with hi,67.92
2010-09-180.06600 grams$50Horrible evening. As I am leaving after picking up tools for W, blam, schnarbs jump on my tail. S was out with gal Sam, I was all alone and didn't panic luckily.7.67
2010-09-190.06600 grams$50Took this out of a larger thing.14.33
2010-09-190.06600 grams$50Playing cards at a friends. 500 not 41. Learnt it a little. My first exposure to this game - i played a kids version called 500 rummy as a kid, nothing to do with this game.3.92
2010-09-190.06600 grams$50Second last of piggishness. Had this at Moan's whilst preparing W's takeaways.2.17
2010-09-190.05000 grams$35The last of a piggish day. My plan was to keep for brekky, S thought otherwise. In retrospect, this was best, as holding brekky leads to no sleep for me, as I anticipate all night long. Had some extra left over after Wazza cut down his final request.3.17
2010-09-210.06600 grams$3040 short. Just got through (both of us) a very nasty night. Using twice on Saturday, 4 times on Sunday, was not a recipe for health come the first day off...44.50
2010-09-220.06600 grams$50Moan's payday. Same old, same old.24.25
2010-09-230.06600 grams$35Shopped for Lou. Things not marvellous with S. I do the 'maybe this isn't working out' speech, she ignores, I don't push. Tired.23.83
2010-09-240.06600 grams$50Payday, friday, drone on.24.17
2010-09-250.06600 grams$50Using early. Perhaps a good idea to get it out of the way. But I doubt it.16.17
2010-09-260.06600 grams$35Around for cards. Though cards didn't eventiate, a player was trying to be good.25.92
2010-09-260.25000 grams$50Saw Richy, Sly was off, sounding v tired.Different I guess. Twice in one day, on a day I wanted to do nil.9.00
2010-09-280.06600 grams$50Got 40 tick, again..Was at doc, got frustrated, left. I had left early to go, had been told I was next client. But no, I saw two others go in then I left.44.17
2010-09-290.06600 grams$50Yesterday the boy skitzed out at a friend of his, T, for feeding chicken to his dog. Apparently there were many more issues we hadn't seen, but it was a strange change of mood. Stasis is death I guess.24.67
2010-10-020.06600 grams$33.6I put in seventy, Moan says she'll put in twenty then pulls out and gets tick from S...tick that I'll pay back. I need to be alone for a while68.00
2010-10-030.06600 grams$50More tick. Boy beginning to run out of gifting. Saw a man in a wheelchair fitting as I drove PA to the dental clinic this morning - on the Victoria Bridge.24.33
2010-10-040.05000 grams$35Tick. Almost didn't shop, but Sim rang me around 7pm and pushed buttons, I folded like a deck chair. Unfortunately I took all my extra done and some vals, should definitely not have used but the valiums lowered my willpower/resistance unfortunately.28.67
2010-10-050.07500 grams$35Got tick. Totalling 320 now. Youch. Living well beyond our means. I sat on the verandah doing Sudoku while my woman haggled for endorphine analogs. Modern life. We waited a while for tonight's shot...Two hours at home, an hour on site. No way to live. I want simplicity, balsa planes and a soft loved one at dawn.24.17
2010-10-060.07500 grams$50Wanted to get a 70, but it was S' pay. I should have skipped using completely but did not. 'If you use, it puts you at a disadvantage' - PA told me the other day re guys in prison who won't use. Falling asleep at work, perhaps due to excess valium usage over last few days?21.75
2010-10-070.06600 grams$50Unsure how much we had. Twenty beans was all I scraped together. I am too afraid to look up how many days in a row this has been. I know that a decade ago I as happy to count how long an unbroken run I had in months not days, but I like to think I have improved a little.24.17
2010-10-080.07500 grams$50Well, the thousandth shot entered into this db, super depressing, super milestone. A shot like any other, a payday shot, a good one, supersized. What can I say? It didn't kill me, it left me dazed and confused for another night of fumbles at Moans.24.08
2010-10-090.06600 grams$50As we wake we plan to score. I argue for getting a weighed hundred, it does not suffice S, we get more as we go.17.33
2010-10-090.04400 grams$0A freeby. A top up. A little aisha aish.2.00
2010-10-100.05600 grams$25Am hoping, in a forlorn, looking at the dirt beneath my feet sort of way, that this is the last shot for a while. Tired of the constant repetition, constant drive to Lutwyche, the repetitive entrance into that room. The cigarette smoke, getting the water from the bathroom. It aches me.22.67
2010-10-120.07500 grams$50Tickety tock. He said he was 'EMI' but turned out better than that. Big news - S and I skipped using yesterday. I sort of think of it as having broken the back of a small furry creature-not a monkey, but something. Still have the gorilla of metro hanging on, but I must take my victories where I can54.00
2010-10-130.07000 grams$37.5Not sure how much I really had. S handed over 150 - half for yesterday's tick, half for today. I piped up 'make it a real 75 not a biggie' but S shouted me down. I didn't follow through (like a good accountant) and determine the real size. Bigger than I report perhaps.23.67
2010-10-140.06600 grams$35Aaah, wanted to skip, didn't resist when S offered to be at my work when I finished. How to buy a house, how to appear real when driven by this engine of emptiness?24.58
2010-10-150.07500 grams$50Today we were meant to be going into town after work. But pay came in late, causing big stress issues, we both panicked when pay was not there by 4pm - never b4 has this happened 0 if this late it's coming in next day usually...24.25
2010-10-160.07000 grams$50Cash paid. Sim off with her mum. I grabbed hers and ate mine immediately. Not such strong stuff.17.33
2010-10-170.05000 grams$35A real 70. Used Sydney trip money. Woke at Moan's hence I used.Have to stop doing that.23.67
2010-10-170.03300 grams$50B lent me a crispy and was nice enough to pick up and deliver. Every now and then I just need this service...Now I sit here, heavy-headed and drifting away, while Peter A and Bek josh and spliff on the verandah. Work in a few hours.12.25
2010-10-180.05000 grams$35Sim pushed for this one, our day off it was to be but we rarely have those nowadays. Habits we have. We're sick and edgy when when we've used the day before. A day off is quite harsh, to put it mildly.18.58
2010-10-190.06600 grams$45This was to be our day off, but I transferred 90 beans from my Sydney fund to her acc and told her, knowing we would use. Horror drive to boy's, picked up S at first petrol and got stuck in wrong lane, added twenty minutes to the journey. One of those 'not meant to be' days.23.58
2010-10-200.06600 grams$50And again. Payday. Made no eye contact with the boy, second day running. He is very pre-occupied. Why wouldn't you be in that bizzo?24.08
2010-10-210.06600 grams$50Aaah, off to Sydney in the morning, the very very early morning. Back the same day, so no chance to escape gabo for a bit, instead I'll want it more, as I'll be exhausted from the cattle-class roundtrip.23.92
2010-10-220.08000 grams$50Back from Sydney, my first stop is picking up the gal from the boy's. No escape even if I go 1000k south.24.50
2010-10-220.05000 grams$35A weighed one. I cannot complain, when the average is well above expected, it's just that those such as I acclimatise to whatever is dished out quite quickly. And when the dish shrinks the cat runs away with the spoon.1.42
2010-10-230.06600 grams$50Again, Sat'dy scoring, ho hum. We got other stuff done Brekka at Sthbank, backpack-handbag at the Gabba, garbage reversed from Reverse Garbage. But still broke from scoring. Nothing left for food15.33
2010-10-240.06600 grams$35Sunday. No rest for the habitted. But the boy advises us that he has been up since 4, a few people dropping by at such an early hour. I'm off to pares for Sunday driving after lunch.24.83
2010-10-250.06000 grams$40Spending Sim's rent, at her behest, with her blessing. Pathetic. Every day every day...29.83
2010-10-260.06800 grams$35Talk about a snake eating its own tail. Somewhere in suburbia PA reads this comment tonight and chuckles, his immense anger subsiding for a moment. Is he in the living room of 24, just 20 years old again? Or is he across town, nearly forty years lived but no death on the horizon?24.25
2010-10-270.06600 grams$0A nasty time. S has headed to the boy's ahead of me. When I ring just before arrival, from her tone I elicit frustration. I turn up and wait another half hour. I get the impression that some of the delay is invented. A young lad has turned up well after S and boy deliberately lets gal know he will be served first. Whilst this is an act she often benefits from, when it's reversed she is most unhappy.24.33
2010-10-280.27000 grams$60Back to street sizes. Quarter weight now has some meaning. I have been trying to ring the boy since 11am. Had a nasty headache and needed some assistance. Spoke with dq, he tells me it's EMI, and given the negative interaction 'tween S and my S yesterday, I'm not surprised he ignores our calls. People in his position list grudges along with cash as liquid assets. I hope this is not the case here. So shopping out at Mt Grav!23.25
2010-10-290.06000 grams$50A B day. Burial day. Beloved Andre, special and cherished.My Dr, LT, and ma gal, ST, both pointed out how unfair Andres taking was. Only the good die young was what they said.21.58
2010-10-290.07600 grams$52The other half of that 200 bag. Done by eye. Felt prickles off this one so my division must not have been that accurate....2.75
2010-10-300.06600 grams$40Utter dependence. Ringing two separate dealers since ten am, no answers. Life placed on hold, the things we do in this time are lost things, meaningless things, treading water. I ate, I shopped, but I did not function. Then - score, sleepiness, TV. Shameful life.21.50
2010-10-310.08000 grams$22.5Last day of the month. Tomorrow my metro goes up by two-thirds, for just a week. A week to take hold of thi smonkey on my back, while he slumbers under the increase's effects, and throw him to the ground. A chance to escape, or a chance to sink deeper into the pit. But, a chance!22.92
2010-11-030.08000 grams$0Tick. S's pay did not arrive, bank fault poss. DQ lent us 20 beans for dinner, ta dq. I skipped gab Mon and Tues. Should have skipped today, felt ok. But payday is a strong habit. Still, v pissed at self for using today. Now it's back to feeling shitey tomorrow. I awoke at 445am today, wide awake, clear headed, but not sick. Nice.75.33
2010-11-040.28000 grams$60Sly EMI, out to Mt Grav. Low on petrol, used two days in a row.24.42
2010-11-040.25000 grams$0This is a replacement for the last one that did naught. Yet after eating it I only feel like I've had a bad crispy. So either both were shite, or one was nothing and one just cruddy.2.75
2010-11-060.08000 grams$50Well, I used, obviously, but I did manage to not use yesterday, my pay day. May not sound like much of a win but to me it's huge. I cannot remember the last time I voluntarily skipped a pay day. Have to work on a graphical display of my usage and non-usage.40.50
2010-11-070.06600 grams$35Fighting it, but made my mind up while suffering, pushed too hard whilst helping pares re-port a few plants. I had only sculled a very little metro as I arrived at theirs, and the physical labour hit me like a ton of bricks. My mum even asked 'are you okay?' which means I must have looked pretty bad. 25.25
2010-11-100.05500 grams$30Ok, so boy back from a frantic trip down south, perhaps, and this was good as S was forced to have Mon and Tues off - she asked me to try tick form Rich, I said no. 75.50
2010-11-100.03500 grams$20So when S saw the size of our packet she freaked, and told Sly it was too big...luckily he didn't take any back, so she bagged a bit...which we ended up faux-fighting about, and it was slightly nasty. Neither wanted to give up this second shot. I think usually I would bow to chivalry and skip it but not today.0.42
2010-11-120.06600 grams$50Payday again. I try to not use, as I did a week ago today, but fail. This kind of 'failure' is something Ineed to learn to accept without self-punishment. Still learning as I head to near four decades ticked off the list.47.58
2010-11-130.07500 grams$50Dosh blown. Turns out to be first of two shots today, not great.19.33
2010-11-130.06000 grams$25Last of cash, actually Sim's birthday money from her bro. I went to S's by myself, Paul staying there with a huge shiner.7.08
2010-11-140.06500 grams$0tick off boy, peter a over, work rang at 8am for upgrade checking, am v tired and no energy for dealing with peter, he is so angry with everyone - me for not talking for 45 minutes every time he rings at whatever hour...16.75
2010-11-160.06600 grams$2550 tick. Payday tomorrow, so it's not that bad. Managed to skip using yesterday. S a bit sore tonight, and a three hour wait aggravated that. She held her complaints in like a trooper though, and did not whine and wail pointlessly. These days off are adding up I hope.54.67
2010-11-170.06600 grams$50Half base half normal. Added acide, abit of acide..(private zed sopt joke). To me it was not as effective, well not so much taste. S pointed out that I had been falling asleep - so perhaps it's just a psychological link between perceived efficacy and sensory triggers such as taste.21.92
2010-11-180.06600 grams$35Tick, day before birthday. Despite all else, it is nice to have a friend who deals so you can organise birthday shots with little stress.24.00
2010-11-180.04000 grams$25This is the tick I grabbed for her birthday wakeup. She used the tired excuse 'I don't want to go to work too wasted' which works as it is true.4.92
2010-11-190.04000 grams$25This is a birthday treat..leftovers from a little tick gotten last night. Strange starting the day with a blat.Leaves me tired and off-game all day at work.7.92
2010-11-190.06600 grams$50Birthdays and gabo. Last week it was DQ's bday and he had great trouble getting on. Dependence on this stuff sets you up for a baleful birthday.11.08
2010-11-190.06600 grams$35More...it's her birthday, we're off to a gig, let's spend everything on gear.0.75
2010-11-200.07000 grams$50Busy day. S on birthday duty with bro and mum. I had to skip bowls as I had an appt with doc for a metro script. Straight out of dropping them off we went and scored. S and I both know we live lies, and for what purpose? Who are we trying to satisfy with our badly acted cover stories.20.00
2010-11-210.08000 grams$35Paid electronically. Tight chest, lost voice, sore gums...radiation poisoning? No, just heavy dope usage I guess.23.75
2010-11-230.07500 grams$35A long wait, so it goes. I skipped using yesterday, Sim did not. So I woke at 430am even after nearly double dosing Monday night.Went to work late Tues as I waited for the chem to open before heading in. That took till eleven am to make me feel human.52.58
2010-11-240.07000 grams$40Again, a payday, again, we shop. Both sick of this lifestyle atm. Looking forward to holidays next year more than ever before.23.08
2010-11-260.07500 grams$50Payday, a week from Moan's birthday.48.08
2010-11-270.25000 grams$50After giving up trying to get on to the boy, I gave R a call and saw him - he came to me at Stones Cnr.18.83
2010-11-270.06000 grams$35Second for the day. Another wasted weekend, getting wasted.5.25
2010-11-280.05500 grams$35Ah, Sunday, have to admit this using was as much my idea as hers. After driving mum for an hour I slipped into old habits, wanting to sedate...21.08
2010-11-290.06000 grams$40Moan visited doc at last, and no surprise, needs mammogram etc, biopsy etc. She doesn't wanna do this, I have to pressure her. I guess in her case I would not want to either. She says she'd rather die of cancer than go through the poking, the prodding. I murmur understanding and go score with her.26.83
2010-11-300.08000 grams$50Tick, tockety tick. Young M is outta staying at Uncle Gov's, and he is smiling and fullfaced. Healthy living has its rewards.24.17
2010-12-010.07000 grams$50Moan's payday, I pay back an extra 40. Funds low.24.08
2010-12-020.07000 grams$50Another thursday, spending our all.23.75
2010-12-030.06000 grams$35S asks me to not use before I meet her friend, then she says ' maybe a small one'. I guess our definitions of 'small ones' differ.24.25
2010-12-030.07000 grams$50Second for the evening. Out with S's friend, S. And her boyfriend, at a club in West End. Strange the people who frequent West End now. Straight edge, I would call them.3.33
2010-12-040.25000 grams$50No sly all day. Peeps ringing and texting me every twenty minutes. What to do? See Rich with Lou's help mid arvo, that's what.18.00
2010-12-040.06600 grams$35Despite having seen rich earlier, when Sim found out Sly was on, she was over there. Ah well.4.00
2010-12-060.06600 grams$50Ah well, used, but at least I did not use yesterday. Not for want of S trying. We went to HP7, when we got out S rang him for an hour but providentially his phone was off.46.00
2010-12-070.05000 grams$35Boy was v asleep when we arrived. Ran out of fast apparently and crashed like a machine out of fuel. Luckily P took pity on us and prepared something to eat, even though it was just on the promise of an e-tfr.24.00
2010-12-080.08000 grams$50Just prior to the Zed 35th birthday party. Turns out tonight will mark Bek's return to the gab fold - another expired implant. U2 and Jay-Z are playing at Lang Park (not using the corporate name).23.83
2010-12-090.05500 grams$35Today marked a turning point. 'The death of purity'. Commercial pressures have resulted in a good product being blended with an inferior one. I understand the arguments (mainly from a safety p.o.v) but still believe it's better togive out information with a product than to assume density and hand out a lower grade one. Ah well, it's not for I to decide.24.17
2010-12-090.05500 grams$25A 2nd bag for the night - not needed, but cash is loose with this redraw of mine lately.3.67
2010-12-100.08000 grams$50(reconstruct). Think this was shitey. Tried going elsewhere Sat morn, and five hours later I was hammering his phone again for a re-up.Sheeet!20.00
2010-12-110.08000 grams$50Reconstructed records again..Looks like I got up early, tried Mt Gravatt first off - probably coz this was the start of a glorious experiment in dilution by the illustrious boy.18.50
2010-12-120.25000 grams$60So S still off, fair enuff, but I've just driven to Stanthorpe to watch a guy blatt three times in front of me, and then back to Bris non-stop. Car's oil light is on, and I overfilled the oil I think.29.83
2010-12-130.37500 grams$75Ack. Last of my Christmas bonus gone. Drove out to Inala, Sim left ATM card at home, back to Highgate, back out to Inala, back to Highgate. Nice stuff I guess but exy. White rock25.08
2010-12-140.06600 grams$35Reconstructed from phone records...what can I say two weeks later. Guessing I grabbed a 70, being so far away from payday.22.83
2010-12-150.06000 grams$35Took ma car to the local garage this morning as I'd put over 3 litres of oil into a 1.5L oil tank. I'd spent half an hour or more on the road under the front of it trying to loosen the oil sump nut...Spent the first ten minutes tightening the nut-upside down my clockwise met my anti-clockwise and confused my whole left-right up down world....25.00
2010-12-160.07500 grams$50Big day, I go shopping for 'her'. hail yesterday, storms today but no hail. My sis arrives this weekend, I have to arrange a present for Jos as it's his birthday tomorrow...23.42
2010-12-170.08000 grams$50Bank to 'da pure'. I say due to customer demand, he says due to laziness. Somewhere modesty meets reality, but it is not anywhere near me. Anyway, happier munchkins are we.(Although mid arvo today I had peripheral hallucinations that made me feel dizzy - a swig of metro banished them. Google suggests they are a bi-polar symptom. Great!)23.83
2010-12-180.07000 grams$50Ended up going around unannounced, had tried ringing for hours. Tied up renting toys for nephews and nieces all morn.21.42
2010-12-190.06000 grams$35Family here from Fiji, snuk away to score, got through on landline to him...25.42
2010-12-200.06600 grams$35Monday scoring...nasty. Never got my shit organised for these times - cash be gone days, electronic, if it's still around, is slated for some direct debit I should not be bunking.25.00
2010-12-210.06000 grams$35Tickety tock. Four days to Christmas, no presents bought yet, all I focus on is gear. It took several hours of calls before he eventually rang me back today. At least he did I guess.24.08
2010-12-220.06000 grams$35Horrible day. S's pay did not turn up until just before 5. She had given up and put PJs on. I wish in retrospect I hadn't advised her, but I guess I was being selfish, as I had dinner at pares with sis' family and I needed gabo-energy for this.24.42
2010-12-230.06600 grams$50Day prior to Chrissymuss Eve. You know you're running a habit when you zip off from work to score at lunch. And then plan to go back after work.17.92
2010-12-230.06600 grams$35Twas the night before the night before Christmas, and I got thru to the lad first call...meant to be.9.08
2010-12-240.06600 grams$35First of the day. Not to be the last. Finished work early, S was at dealer's house already. I zip over and use the last of my funds.17.83
2010-12-240.08000 grams$50Oh dear. The gear bought to get us both through the trials of tomorrow is gone, less than an hour after getting home with it. And it's not like we hadn't already had a shot this arvo. I both knew S would want to use this immediately, and also was resigned to using my share with her.2.25
2010-12-260.08000 grams$35Day after Christmas. Ate something that gave me constant runs. This shot bought me around eight hours of relief, enough to entertain relatives and look not too sick. But it' smy last cash.44.17
2010-12-280.05000 grams$50Up at six am. Watch 'The Wire episodes back to back till lunchtime. Walk around the block then I break. Ring,, and on. So easy to fk up, so much more work not to.49.00
2010-12-280.05000 grams$17Still sick from rich lobster. Scoring stops it for eight hours on the nose. Am hoping I put a little pain on the monkey this long weekend.6.67
2010-12-290.07000 grams$45First day with one cent of cash in five days. A LONG long weekend, hanging and the runs. Twice sick.20.92
2010-12-300.06000 grams$35Second time around. For a day that was planned to be a no-go day, that's not so smart. Indicates little self-control left. Just took a snifter of biz to get my wheels turning again.25.58
2010-12-310.08000 grams$50paid back a crispy tick. on top of that, 450 to doc for vaccines and visits. Expensive day. No money for shots or food, 6 days to payday. Maybe next year will be better.20.92
2011-01-010.10000 grams$35Bam. 'nother year, straight into it. Waited tilll after lunch, then took awhile to get on. Can't believe (guess I can) that a year makes no diff.26.33
2011-01-020.04000 grams$0I went in uninvited. With some dosh from Lou, but still uninvited. Got a scraping's scraping. Not a way to live. Think this was a 'holdoff' freebie to keep me going till tonight.20.08
2011-01-020.07500 grams$50Another day of waiting. Watching The Wire, ringing my small collection of dealers to hear their answering machine messages, going to Nudgee Beach to see what the mudflats may have delivered in driftwood and refuse. Swapping gossip with the other users to see what's what.5.17
2011-01-040.06600 grams$35Bam, a day off, and I'm on my ass. Swerving down the ICB.48.58
2011-01-050.08000 grams$25Did a little work for a friend, I guess that's an old habit I'm falling into, but seem to have little choice given the current rate of spending on this shite.24.33
2011-01-060.06000 grams$35Couldn't get through, went around on advice of friend dq. All good. Raining like Old Testament times, under his house it ran in waves.21.17
2011-01-070.08500 grams$50Repaid some tick, as one does on paydays. Then home alone, trying to stay strong on some principles.Not long now to my fifth decade. S seems contented to not get physical with me again. Little surprised, always surprises me when I have to yet again lower my expectations. I'd thought they were rock bottom already, but apparently not.23.58
2011-01-090.08000 grams$30Expecting this at seven last night, so an actual delivery of 1am is not so bad. This Brisbane boy, not some NYC corner where you can rock outside and cop 24/7. This has an up side as well as down - harder to run a heavy habit here.31.92
2011-01-090.08000 grams$35Tockety tick...Sundays bloody sundays. On the countdown to an exit line, hoping I be making it.13.33
2011-01-100.08000 grams$35Tockety tick. Boy was in an expansive mood, fabulating and assisting me with some petrol shortages I was experiencing. Pretty perfect to run out up on his very doorstep. Like it was meant to be. 'I'll get you there, but no further', someone on high said tonight. And on high I got.28.00
2011-01-130.08000 grams$35Did I mention the floods?That gal S is staying here till her power returns? That I didn't get a day off work whilst S hasn't worked since Day One of the biblical event? Fairness?71.00
2011-01-140.07600 grams$50Aaak, it's 10pm on payday. I have 8- cash and had to talk S outta spending that last money on scoring again. Not a great situ to be in, a week from planned holidays that won't be cheap...23.83
2011-01-160.08000 grams$35Sunday - shoulda asked for a Sunday 70 instead of a decent 70, I live and learn.Six hours later I was itching to eat again, and did.No reflection on quality of supply, rather its a reflection on quality of suppliee.42.08
2011-01-160.04000 grams$50Tickety tock. Left Mr Adams at home (hoping he doesn't set the place on fire in my absence) and zoomed over to shop...and grab some petrol. Many traffic lights still out, streetlights also, and not many drivers (essential travel only they say- at least they're not stopping peeps to ask the reason for their travel).9.58
2011-01-170.07000 grams$35Tock till morrow. Gotta save save save. Getting things organised for my time off. So much to do. Model plane progressing.20.50
2011-01-180.10000 grams$50Silly boy I am, blowing travel spends...But big day for boy, he is no longer boy but man now? Due to events in his life took an understandable while to get hold of him-in the end I did through dq.25.50
2011-01-180.06000 grams$30More more more I said. Perhaps given that I nearly had nothing tonight, or perhaps coz I hva megabucks for a day or two, I went gabo-silly for a moment,,,0.50
2011-01-210.09000 grams$60paid 80 tick, trying to stop this twice a night bizzo. Tomorrow one way or another I end this crazy run.70.08
2011-02-140.06000 grams$35Wow. Four days back from India and I'm using like a loser. When I saw it in Som I was appalled. Now here I am, unable to give a day a miss. Tomorrow we have vowed to try. What to do instead? Eat out I guess, valium, entertain, movies?578.50
2011-02-150.20000 grams$0Okay, this time maybe 30 units white vinegar, let it sit for an hour, add 20 units water and mix - no heat. Filtered using a dirty sharp (thanks Moan for deliberatley taking the cleans) and I have a working shot5.33
2011-02-150.25000 grams$0Promised not to visi boys today, S asks if I have some at mine. She is fully committed to doing something every single day. Were we ever overseas?16.08
2011-02-160.15000 grams$0Mixed overnight. The vinegar had set to a hard sirface, which I had to break like a morning walker getting water from a frozen creek. Only thi screek is muddy and acidic and possibly fatal!14.25
2011-02-160.05000 grams$35Hmm, been everyday since I've retrurned, whether it be this lad or my own dastardly concoction. Either way - not good.10.00
2011-02-190.20000 grams$0Woke and went home from S's to grind the last shareable shot of teh last rock from Kolkata. The gal's fit blocked, mine slid in nice n easy....61.50
2011-02-190.10000 grams$0Greedy. I pound and powder the last little rock I kept for myself, a treat for the risks taken, for the potential outcomes avoided by me and only me. Somethings cannot be shared I'm afraid.2.42
2011-02-190.45000 grams$0Run out, and Sly off to OceanWhores, so we did the scrapy scrape tango, nasty. Vinegar, water, heat, filter, suck. Rinse and repeat three times. We did put a lot of brown particles up our arms,but little gabo-effect, if any.6.50
2011-02-220.05000 grams$35Ticking up tock, awaiting a late return for the boy from down south. We drove to his after work to stop a block away and be advised he was not around. S suggested sitting there 'for a bit', I counselled against as we had zero data on a return time.77.00
2011-02-220.05000 grams$35The second seventy, bought at my instigation. Takeaway for those who should be taken away.1.03
2011-02-230.05000 grams$35Aah, little to say here. S's payday. I take dinner to her but come home, it is the right thing to do. Baby steps, doing little right things trying to work up to a run of righteousness.20.97
2011-02-250.05500 grams$35Payday. Tully holed and drained, she looks v unhappy but recovery can be tough. Hoping she makes it through this and thrives. Start Uni in a few days. Lectures! Learning! Stimulation!46.25
2011-02-260.08000 grams$50Ah, wazzup? Moan working the morn. Small chat to boy, was good. Watched schnarbs searching a car outside Biala at one am this morn. Didn't get involved for fear of lockup meaning no metro for a few days. An effective tool to suppress dissent, is metro.18.00
2011-03-010.03300 grams$30First day of my B Sc at UQ. Double dosed, yet still used. Pathetic. Had hoped that I may be able to tie a little sanity on to my academic life, distance it from all else. No.75.75
2011-03-020.08000 grams$35Who'd have thought you could start feeling trapped twenty years in? Well, I've started just recently, and it's been over twenty years. A 3 week sojourn to India during which I scarcely used, then return to Brisvegas and it's heads down using. No control.26.50
2011-03-050.07000 grams$35A seventy, nicely topped up. Sim worked the morning. At least not getting on as soon as we wake. Couldn't get through, just went around...68.83
2011-03-060.10000 grams$50Oh dear lord. eTfr, last cash in my SCUL acc, money needed for dir debits etc. Uni not stopping usage. Pathos, patheticism20.92
2011-03-080.05000 grams$35Uni day. First full day - pracs and tutes. Very enjoyable. Skipped using yesterday - felt like the first day off since returning from India, but S says we've had another day off.53.25
2011-03-110.23000 grams$50So, Sly is definitely gone. The house is close to demolished - last visit it had no downstairs and the back verandah was quarter gone. So not surprising today he is gone. I did not spend much effort chasing him, instead, with Bek I went to Mt Gravatt and got on for her, I and Sim.72.92
2011-03-120.30000 grams$75So out to Mt Gravatt for expensive sugar. Rang the lads at 1130am, told they were 'busy' till 3pm. Then at 3pm when I ring it's all "hurry hurry get out here now!". So thi sis to be life from now. On the positive side I can do some study tomorrow, start to return to reality.21.92
2011-03-140.20000 grams$50So, third time scoring from this source...Still not good. Sim reckons her skins breaking out, there sure is too much sugar in it. And we're experiencing that lovely 'you always got to wait' lyric. Give them ten minutes notice before we arrive, then we arrive and wait another forty minutes...50.08
2011-03-150.10000 grams$50So, looking around for new supplies, this beats Richies sugar, but not by much. Homebake we used to call it - refined morph tabs, and not refined to a neutral pH - gotta add vinegar ('ger) to break it down. Better than sugar I guess27.50
2011-03-210.20000 grams$35Got 30 tick, the stuff is shite, so don't feel bad. His friend is in hospital for self-harm talk.. Raised the beans thru purchasing stuff online for S' bro. Tomorrow boy appears in Brissie we hear.140.42
2011-03-260.23000 grams$0My miner friend wanted another baggie, and stupidly I don't try my friend D's friend G, I go straight to my sugar peddler, R. I get very little out of it and I am pissed off - imagine how my miner mate must feel...117.83
2011-03-260.16000 grams$0Second part of the tax taken from shopping for W, and just as bad as the first tax. I added in some lasagne dish scrapings boy had left behind here, so maybe there'll be a minor improvement over time.1.17
2011-03-290.08000 grams$0Pyrex dish explodes and ruins pearl barley risotto - that is my life at 40.74.00
2011-03-300.08000 grams$30Wake and bake. Out of w's bit. 12.17
2011-03-300.05000 grams$30Lunchtime. No metro, so a walk in the rain to a car and a blat.5.83
2011-03-300.08000 grams$30Last tax of the bag, too much by far.4.25
2011-03-310.20000 grams$50No boy, so covered dq and got an intro to new man at Brown Stains. Nice, but multiples of centuries only.24.50
2011-04-010.24000 grams$65So, this looks like the way we go now. After work, a long drive to Browns Plains, and packets in multiples of a hundred, rated at 42% gear in his last bust. I was hanging out a little today - sneezed for the first time in a month. Sim experienced same symptoms. So we're keen.24.42
2011-04-010.18000 grams$42.5Second shot for teh night. Not good. I owe boy 500, and have blown a lot of it just living in the last few days. I am not weak enough to play that old 'it's your fault, by not being around I missed out on sales and spent your dough' line - but it's crossed my mind. I am meant to be learning verbatim a script for a Stats oral presentation tomorrow.1.92
2011-04-020.15000 grams$42.5A night of destroyed sleep. At 6 I go to Sim's, where I left six hours earlier, I knock at door, I rang her mobile..in the end I threw little pebbles at the window - third pebble woke her. Morning shots always ruin my day, and my previous night's sleep, but I do em again and again.10.92
2011-04-020.20000 grams$50Pre oral presentation nerves, how pathetic, trying to balance a cocktail of pharms to help me give a 5 min presentation. Still, I'm better off than mumbles...7.00
2011-04-030.22000 grams$50One of those days. Dealer was out with family all day, and Vodafone's mobile network was down all day, which meant the alternative, Mt Gravatt, was uncontactable. Of course, they both became available within ten minutes of each other, as is always the case.28.67
2011-04-040.26000 grams$0Working for the miner. A decent one for a change. Being hassled by boy from down south, needs a stopover.Well paid for providing a place for a mo.24.83
2011-04-040.05000 grams$0Being recompensed for having a house of friends...does one need recompense for such a situation? Boy obviously thinks so. I feel bad, I ate through some beans I owed...1.17
2011-04-040.12000 grams$0Still a'taxin, and still from a 'friend. It's a dark game that puts one to stealing from honest friends, and darker still when these friends whom you're a 'taxing, have first put up funds plus surplus for you to help them commune. 'Make sure you get something out of it' they hollered. That was days past, and you got out of it, no more thoughts of he.3.50
2011-04-060.20000 grams$50It's a drive down there, make no mistake. Stress of a day, S left her keycard at home, but unsure of that so I went there at lunch to find it in a Night Owl bag in the recycling bags...Petrol is an issue with a fifty k roundtrip to sore each day.43.08
2011-04-060.20000 grams$50No prompting needed. We shot, went to Woollies for twenty minutes, S checked her balance then said "Ring and get another one.". Righty-o, I support that. Strange gear. Unsatisfying whilst physically effective. I was fighting to keep the car on the road and myself awake all the way home, but not feeling 'stoned'. Make sense? yeah, I know, I know...0.58
2011-04-070.20000 grams$50Down to BP again..had a nice chat to him, h's even heard of PKD, which not a lot of people have...23.33
2011-04-110.20000 grams$47.5Wait for him to have his 'tea'. A family man, reminds me of Jack years ago. The Roms in general with their quadrupally addicted children, and they peddled on, seeing no link between their acts and their children's use.96.00
2011-04-110.06000 grams$35Tick. Only minutes after polishing off a meal from BP, information arrived via the ether, that a new colt was in town. I winged quickly but not hurriedly (rainfell heavily on the passage). Drive to Hardgrave Rd, then run him back to Sims, then he is picked up by another. Busy little economy.1.83
2011-04-130.09000 grams$60S gets locked up for 60 days, from this very day, in some NSW lockup. And teh biz goes on, unperturbed. Another soldier falls, the idea continues.46.17
2011-04-130.06000 grams$35If this was a movie, this next shot will be my last, as never before have I recorded a shot prior to having it. As I'm already sozzled, I stopped at my flat to record details of the next shot to be had at Sims. In movieworld that's a definite sign of oncoming doom.3.67
2011-04-150.06600 grams$60Who knows what weight. Nice n dry though, and police presence in teh Valley seems to have died down since last night's paranoia-fuelled stress-fest. Gear is gear, and addicts will need it regardless of cops being in the way, ok?44.08
2011-04-160.06600 grams$50The valley, and asked to repay tick by one who still owes me a century that I could ill afford to lose..yet when he is owed, and not needed, it is the first topic in any discussion tween him and I.16.83
2011-04-160.05000 grams$25An unexpected shot, upon visiting a friend's mate, south of the border. I afeared its origin, Sim reacted with a scoff. This was to be the beginning of a day of nasty jab jabs.8.92
2011-04-170.03000 grams$25A shot, thought granted gratis, turned out to be part of an itemised bill presented before I left this friend's friend's house. All costs were accounted for and the bill presented followed by an "Is that uncool?" statement that is given always in the expectation of a negative answer...12.08
2011-04-170.03000 grams$0Some red horror self made and therefore I felt I should take. Morph reaction and pounding blood vessels in the head, an arvo of painful bones.4.08
2011-04-180.20000 grams$50A long drive, to BP via Carina to collect dosh. The lass could only get 2/3 of hers away - purely by luck, her chords have burned out before mine. I grabbed a 'vein care' book from Bi-fizz yesterday, rotate rotate rotate. I tried to hit in the opposite arm, but memories formed a solid chitinous skin.31.00
2011-04-190.24000 grams$45A long drive. And use on a day scheduled for not using. An unexpected call from a man, bereft of Sly, willing to lend a century to meet his own needs. I have the way, he has the mans. An eternal story.23.50
2011-04-200.30000 grams$75Greed? Perhaps not. I am sure, that given this is S' payday, had we started with a century, within twenty minutes I would feel a tug on my sleeve and a plaintive 'Can you ring him again?'. Which, given my superior accountancy training, would result in $100 plus $100 = $200...more expensive than $150. So not greed, instead, frugality through foresight!24.00
2011-04-210.20000 grams$50Easter weekend, off a little early. BP trip again, much petrol used. Couldn't get a payday 150, so grabbed a century. Trying to use new spot to rest vein. Big W at BP very scary. Video'd a little to remind myself down the track where I spent my paydays...23.75
2011-04-220.25000 grams$50Shopping for W, on a fly thru. Long long weekend. Nice to get a bit of sickness done, but as always, plans and cash get in the way. 17.58
2011-04-240.23000 grams$50And I return midday Easter Monday, and hit pause and start watching Deadwood again from where I paused it last night when I got the call to score. Life paused, show paused, in conjunction. Nice stuff, though.57.92
2011-04-260.22000 grams$50Unexpected. DQ rings me - sniffling in a bad way, he has locked himself outta car with cash and a goal - but he cannot get there. And sender cannot come, as he's lost licence. He rings off, saying he couldn't ask me t help, if I'm not doing the same. Ten minutes later he rings back.41.75
2011-04-270.30000 grams$45Depressed at my going down to BP again..3 for jet n michelle, 1 for me. S's pay doesn't go in so we are helped by j&m-thanks be to them.S oft does not get paid when there's a public holiday...strange logic but the rule holds today.Off to watch Dr Who S6E1!26.58
2011-04-280.33000 grams$75I pushed to skip using today. I reminded S of this before and after work. Her cash (well, at least until I repay it tomorrow) so her choice. Bigger shot as last few days we'v exceeded centuries somewhat.24.17
2011-04-290.32000 grams$50Stress. Juggling four junkies and their wants, repaying debts, working around a doc appt for metro. All this strife to get on and wangle some extra gear gratis..25.67
2011-05-010.25000 grams$50My last dollars, of course. Tried Pram first, he was still a couple or few hours off having his boy arrive. Then M, as his placed passed Bi-Fizz which would have suited, but he was at work. So G it is, with a 60 k round journey, or so it feels. It is I think. Now my car is about out of petrol, I am stoned and the day is near done.43.42
2011-05-040.33000 grams$50Seeing as Monday was a public holiday, S' employers decide not to pay S on her payday. Of course, banking systems in Aust being the dilapidated machinery they are, we could not confirm until the 4pm BOQ batch posting that she had missed out for sure. After two days off gear (Monday and Tues) this was a sore finding. Luckily a treeman lumbered along to fell our misery.75.08
2011-05-050.10000 grams$50OK, so I guess we were expecting a burn, but they still surprise you when they happen. I guess I like to think the not-obvious sometimes, so the plain obvious is a kick in the teeth. I feel worse for friend B who put in 150 and also got nil23.33
2011-05-060.38000 grams$50Helping out treeboy D. Been lucky the last few weeks, I guess since someone went away for a couple of months, more and more people rely on flex.Wish I could work out a way to turn it to my advantage financially rather than just gear...25.08
2011-05-110.30000 grams$75So tomorrow we don't use! I hope. Too much cash, too much petrol, too much wear and tear on car and our bodies, too much time. As nice as this guy is, it does not justify what we take from ourselves to maintain usage levels...119.58
2011-05-130.20000 grams$50Took a while to get down with traffic. Payday but also last of my cash. Feels good going into weekend broke, at least I'll get some Comp Sci assignment done.S met him for the first time 2nite. Did a semi-decent #35 shop at Woolies after scoring. Money to go down my throat rather than up my arm. It's all inwards, eh?48.25
2011-05-180.20000 grams$25So delivered to me (well to Milton train station) by mr dq. That was nice. He may have argued me down from 2 spots to one, and forgotten to hand me soem beans I'd asked to borrow, but hey, got the gear which is what counts. And so dramatic! A train pulls in. Doors shoosh open. A man hands another man a small wrapped piece of paper in front of fifteen watching witnesses. The doors shoosh close and I'm left with gear, he with a dozen suspicious travellers!110.50
2011-05-180.30000 grams$50Much amundo. Brekky shots now dinner. Greed. After three whole days from awake to asleep without. 'with a vengeance' is a cliche that pops unbidden into noggin. So many assignements to do, and gabo just carries away my focus. Plus a forty minute wait for Mr No Licence.9.67
2011-05-190.20000 grams$50Another one. Also grabbed '100 boot' for PA. I wait for close to an hour from when I advised him I've arrived in BP. I think he was synching me up with DQ so he could meet us together. Great. I managed to hold on to it all the long way back and had it at S'. A step of progress I think.23.50
2011-05-200.27000 grams$50So this was keenly anticipated. I had gone into a dental appointment, assuming I would walk out in a short period, free of agony. Thi sdid not happen. Dr diagnosed the pain as the result of a sinus infection, so all I got was anti-biotics.Perhaps all my free talk of self-medicating with opiates made him not think about prescribing painkillers.24.08
2011-05-200.22000 grams$50What a day. Awoke in my flat with Peter A, I knew in minutes that a trip to dentist was in order. A few hours later I was barely able to work, I could not focus because of the pain. At least I'd arranged an appt. with Dr Eli for 3:15 that afternoon. Gulping 70% of my metro hadn't relieved my pain. AG suggested a local anaesthetic, I went to the chem and bought Ora-Sed - benzocaine. By 2pm most pain was numbed.1.25
2011-05-210.20000 grams$50Not much these centuries when we've been using 100+ for a while. Taxes, paydays, they all add up to bigger shots. So a straight century doesn't touch the sides...17.33
2011-05-220.20000 grams$0Tick. Firt time for 100% tick, and to G's credit (and ours), it was no prob. A drive to Trinder Park, miles south of the Vegas, and we scored...dq was just moments behind us, having trouble with directions to this house of pain.27.08
2011-05-240.20000 grams$50Ah well, Sim got tick from P, off her own bat, she did all the nasty waiting, twitching on her chair. I wanted to go two days without, she obviously did not. Went down to Hardgrave to pick up teh boy and dropped him off near Boundary. Thanks I guess.52.17
2011-05-260.30000 grams$0Largish shop. Got some thermal boots - look strange but they work. W gives me gifts this time and last time we met. Perhaps he sees how povo I am..but groceries would help more than boots and vacuum flasks, so it's probably for some other reason.46.50
2011-05-260.22000 grams$0What we should have been holding for brekky. As if either of us believed it would last until then...S went so far as to say 'If I take the rest of this tonight I'll have to take tomorrow off work'. She makes it so easy for me to call her on this kind of stuff.3.25
2011-05-270.99999 grams$50Did a little shopping for friend B.I worry that my car is wearing out from all this driving to B Plains and back. I worry that we will both end up stats when I fall asleep on the return journey. I cannot take less, I cannot await until I get home (I did once though), so I drive home in 'quite a state'21.08
2011-05-300.20000 grams$50Tickety tock, straight after Doc. A day off, a day on. So it goes. If I could get all my days to be like this things would improve a bit.71.83
2011-06-010.30000 grams$50I think we got a free crispy outta this, not sure. Did the 'meet on moving train' handover. Very spy, but a bit obvious... Went halves in a 150 anyway, cost was a century I hope.39.08
2011-06-010.20000 grams$50Not a great day. Assignment 3 was meant to be demo'd at 5pm. Scored early in morn and was very nervous n anxious by 5pm. Gear is shite atm. Luckily A3 was postponed (despite my big drive out there I am happy it's delayed as that's more time to prepare, more time to get clean.)9.83
2011-06-030.26000 grams$65Been rubbish down south, so in pain from dentist, in hurry from pain, I went local. Think global act locally, eh? And it was ok. Left me whizzing a bit, but gear does that sometimes in just the right dose. The marvels of repeated administration of untested pharmaceuticals...46.25
2011-06-050.30000 grams$75Ok, shopping for gal B, I ask for 2 and a cadbury but no, so hafta get 2 plus one on tick. That's his fault for no cadburies I thought but he don't see it that way. I promise him it'll be fixed before the day is out, and somehow I did that.43.92
2011-06-050.28000 grams$0Ok, shopped for miner man, did well, paid back a century tick, got a little petrol, but the gear is so shite the whole concept is worthless. Already scored today, so I knew the gear is shite, still I take it. Desperate I guess.6.25
2011-06-070.25000 grams$0AAaaaah! Horrible. No plan to score, until W texts. But I have no petrol, just six bucks. So I end up driving to BP, with the expectation I will run out of petrol on way. And I assume W is covering us for gear, but no, I have to ask. WTF! And then I give G 280 of teh 300 and he's unhappy with that. 46.67
2011-06-080.30000 grams$50Shopping for M. Later he tells me that he won't be doing this again as he took 400 in one night. This is a guy with no habit - it speaks volumes as to the crap quality of this gear that he can absorb that much and function....23.92
2011-06-080.20000 grams$50Since the first 150 did jack, I stupidly give in to S' argument that we buy a century of W's stuff. We do, and it does nothing.1.50
2011-06-090.30000 grams$90This is the problem. I don't want to score, I am at home, vaguely considering trying Mesh for gear, but decided against G, given that it's crap. Then S rings again and I succumb.23.33
2011-06-090.10000 grams$20The useless last fifty of the 200. V annoyed that S refused to allow us to take this. Of course it just did nothing...except the proverbial hole in the arm.1.92
2011-06-100.25000 grams$66.5Sick of BP, so I spend around seven hours trying to corrall Mesh into supply. Painful, doey, slow. This life is no fun if you are not on top of your area.21.08
2011-06-110.22000 grams$60Tick, of course. Worst payday ever. We're about to go out for dinner and I notice we don't have enough for repaying dope debts for the week let alone dinner. S has taken out 150, left me with nil. Beginning of a tough weekend.17.58
2011-06-120.20000 grams$50Tick, but not. S organised tick with the keyword 'borrow'. Usually I use the keword 'favour'. We get there, he hands over the packet, and stops talking. Car falls silent. Eventually he says 'so you've got no dosh'.28.33
2011-06-150.30000 grams$48Ok, first use after two days off, gear has improved as promised, which is nice. Shopped for friend W, a freebie results, but still S whines. Really annoying. She gets a century debt wiped and a free crispy and complains that I haven't bruned friend W hard enough. You handle the relationship and you can decide what to do I tell her. That buys me silence for, what, forty minutes?74.33
2011-06-160.20000 grams$50From P. Dammit, really didn't want to support his nastiness. Often gabo-dealing shows a side of an individual you may never have seen before. The power of health over individuals, the availability of certain girls who will trade body for gear - it can drive an individual a little strange, to say teh least. Mesh showed me quite quickly how petty he could be over a small bit of tick.25.58
2011-06-160.30000 grams$75Oh dear, second shot for the night. My arm got a little peevy at the extra intrusion and required a little smooth-talking. Gaboed but not trashed. $125 all up...1.08
2011-06-190.20000 grams$0Tick. Bloody Sundays. Should be studying stats, but no, I score. My PC at repair shop for RAID. At lest I can get tick.63.33
2011-06-200.20000 grams$45Exam day. STAT1201. And yesterday I was involved in a SVA where I saw a motorcyclist going over his handlebars in my rear vision mirror. So yes, I felt justified in blowing every cent I had to get a shot tonight. Screw petrol, screw health insurance, screw dinner. Gabo.30.00
2011-06-220.20000 grams$50Paid off a century tick. Did last exam today. Went to work after the CSSE1001 exam. Had hoped for a 7, but after exam I'd be happy to get a 6. Must start applying what I learn at Uni at my work.48.08
2011-06-250.25000 grams$0Bad times. Mum just diagnosed. Lost all my pay last night, left in an ATM 'hopper'. Single Vehicle Accident last week, but I wasn't the Single Vehicle. RAID array on E drive gone, 15,000 songs, 800 movies. Times have to change, don't they?64.67
2011-06-260.30000 grams$50Tickety tock. Drove G for, what, 2 hours? And got $10 petrol. Perhaps because we got tick he thought we would take less for labour. Who knows. Later I tried to pull a tree-top off with the Camry bullbar. Such are the days of my life.26.33
2011-06-270.32000 grams$50At last, good gear. Nasty weekend. Left my pay in teh ATM dispenser and only found out this arvo at 4 that it was not lost..3 days later.28.42
2011-07-010.10000 grams$40Friend M needs assist to bang up, early days for him. He asks me to come over, I arrive and he says 'You got any coin?'. By this he means 'have I any cash?'. Well, I did, last night, I had 200 when I first rang him. Which I wanted to spend on his product. But he couldn't stay awake, he couldn't maintain that basic dealer-client relationship, so we shopped elsewhere this morning. 95.50
2011-07-010.20000 grams$50So, got to leave work early because I fixed server. Stayed till 10:30PM Thurs night. I stay till their fixed, that's in my blood. So when I get undermined, interrupted and devalued whilst repairing, I take it to heart. I got upset, I cried at work. And for that I sort of am pissed at myself.0.17
2011-07-020.20000 grams$50So yes, we're buying gear we know won't work. Woke at 4am this morning, 'PING!' went my little eyes. You know the shot the night b4 was crud when that happens. But having a dealer who only works in multiples of a century leads to this result.18.67
2011-07-020.20000 grams$50So this is S's cash now. She popped a little of the first shot. Which was weak as piss to begin with. And was a century, not a century and a half that we knew we needed. So popping an under-sized shot of crap gear...well, you can see how you may want to score again. And this was that second shot.1.50
2011-07-060.22000 grams$50G was dicking around when we turned up at bp to shop at 545. V strange. Mate W wanted something immediately, so called Mesh, and found him broken down near a highway. He sold us a g, rubbish of course, but it sustained until we could sort out the later shop.100.92
2011-07-060.32000 grams$75Just guessing size. One and a half bags. On the night G went a bit bonkers.2.83
2011-07-060.10000 grams$50Wow. So late. Just back home from Thornside. Kept a sneaky shot for myself, haven't even delivered the gals' yet. And here I sit, underwear clad and only passingly stoned, three shots into a day about to end.2.17
2011-07-080.26660 grams$66.5Covered for dq, made a little film in Bunnings carpark. Always funny when 3 people say 'this is hit' then 30 minutes later find themselves wheeling around on a trolley shooting a chaplin-esque film. guess it did work as dq muttered at one stage, and he was right.42.33
2011-07-090.30000 grams$75Ok, rang dealer at 901am. Scored at 545pm. What the? Brisbane is no longer the nineties in terms of good dope availability. Nearly broke and scored local shite from the Indian outta desperation. However, when it's your last hudnred bucks you tend to think a little straighter23.75
2011-07-100.26660 grams$50shopped for B.wasn't going to, but at same time knew i would, when i left B yesterday.once u start thinking about gear it's hard to get outta that cycle without scoring. and with no car, and mesh useless, she rang me.19.08
2011-07-110.20000 grams$50Shite. Getting smaller, as his guy puts the 8ball price up. Who pays? Always muggins. The choice to work and be broke rather than deal and be rich is always a tough one to live with on days like today. Stoned dealers rambling endlessly in teh backseat about how tough their life is as u hand over your last money - food money, petrol money.28.67
2011-07-130.30000 grams$75So we meet friend dq at the train station, milton this time, and as of late the stuff is shite. A century and a half between two people after a day off should be enough to elicit some feeling. S popped hers a little, but I did not, and I felt nowt.38.92
2011-07-130.22000 grams$60So, we be polite, we try glads for a choc, 150 that is, even though we know it's shite. He does the usual 'No 100 or 200". Fine. We don't have 200 and 100 isn't going to work with that stuff, so we go to Mt Grav. And it's frikkin nice! Maybe just a change, maybe we got a special introductory offer, but either way it was better than the nothing we were expecting to feel from a 150 from brown stains. 9.08
2011-07-140.20000 grams$30Ok, so last of pay, I wanted to go to Denim, have coffee and cakes, buy a nice dinner then a movie, S pushed for gear. We snaggled mesh into a halfweight mission, all stressful and last dollarish.24.67
2011-07-150.30000 grams$50ok, horrible day, pay stuffed up, didn't think i'd see any cash till Monday, then it turns up at 630 - and I'm out a dqs at goodna borrowing 120 to score and eat with. so we ended up doing this big loop for no reason.25.67
2011-07-160.20000 grams$50ok, so woollies not on. give in and go to glads. uncomfortable. tell him straight that it's not personal, it's to do with small size and crud quality.16.83
2011-07-220.22500 grams$75Shite. As expected, it was delivered. Though that is a little harsh. Before I walked in my flat door I was nodding a little and when I rang dq he said that "my voice sounded frothy" which for him is the sign I am .... satisfied.147.83
2011-07-220.30000 grams$0Yummy. Good gear, easy to do, no long drive, ATO overpays my refund by over a thousand..not bad.B in pain though, nod burns foot, or so the headline would say. If Murdoch still ran crap papers! He's in shit, having foam pies tossed at his face, diminuitive asian wives saving his old wrinkled ass. Loving it!1.83
2011-07-220.17000 grams$75Ok, so waited all day, sort of, for this. Awoke all cashed up. Expected noone to be around until lunch. Correct on that aspect. Overly correct. Richy doesn't answer, just goes straight to "PLEASE, DO NOT LEAVE A MESSAGE", emphasis on the NOT word. Glen answers at 1230, tells me he has t shop b4 we do anything. Rich answers also, eventually, to say he'll be out until late, 8pm. Ta boys!4.33
2011-07-230.25000 grams$60Aaah well, awaking to a morning shot ain't enough for some junkies! There's some cash lying around so why not spend it all on gear!16.75
2011-07-240.25000 grams$75I think this is what we get for 150. a real q. horrible. but woollies not on, so bp it is, bad choices, wasted cash, but wait for one who never turns on or spend now for shite? The eternal23.83
2011-07-250.32000 grams$62.5Big spend, last of over repayment of tax monies - ATO returned my hard earned HECS payments. The damage they do in their blind fumblings. So I get a 'half and a bit' - 200 for a weighed half, plus 50 bucks worth to make it 'nice'. So we think.26.33
2011-07-270.30000 grams$75So, shopped again. Blowing S' pay on top of ATO refund. Nasty. DOn't barely feel shots anymore. One of Dr T's patients is dead, most likely by his own hand, he asked for extra metro takeaways and took them all. She is quite upset, was shaking yesterday as she saw Sim. Coroners' inquest etc.47.75
2011-07-290.32000 grams$62.5Yes, running late to doc, have to score first, try BP after mt grav off, then mt grav on, so cancel bp, run to mt grav, score, shoot, so close to outta petrol but run to h hill get metro script, dinner at sushi new farm, petrol aaaah, at last then home and study48.42
2011-08-010.20000 grams$0bonus shot, taxations with representations, taxations with pins n needles. Awake before light plunge darkened steel n i'm right, for the foreseeable.59.17
2011-08-020.30000 grams$75Late night. Uni on a Tues, thanks to ma boss...prac session, we built digital circuits outta breadboards, logic probes, '74' family of ICs and some LEDs and switches. It worked. No good at the boolean algebra yet.38.00
2011-08-030.20000 grams$25First shot. Stressing as no richy with less than forty minutes till I leave work. Not keen on gladding with a five spot. What a waste. Miner was keen no matter what, but I had experience from last Sat that it was crud....22.83
2011-08-030.18000 grams$20Oh dear, second shot for evening. SO smashed an hour and a half ago that S nearly would not come with me to the coffee club...Yet here we are banging up more gear as soon as dinner is eaten. (Fish, Perch, Scallops of the Sea variety). Healthy, for those macro-whatsits.You know, those oils peeps are raving about. Omega-3, that's it! Junk dried brain fires at random, but usually in the correct direction.1.67
2011-08-030.22000 grams$0So thi sis teh second rock I grabbed outta W's bag. I think I may have pushed too hard on him.0.08
2011-08-060.23000 grams$40Mesh came along, tension somewhat as S didn't back down. Anyways, this was us spending the last of our cash on a shot that wasn't big enough. I am glad to get to this point, honestly. I have extra metro from friend P, so I can tackle withdrawal head on.67.67
2011-08-090.06700 grams$0Needed a second. Hating that I use whilst dad soldiers on, upset. I think gear at such times delays the healing process.73.08
2011-08-090.07500 grams$0The first one didn't quite hit it. Interestingly enough, when S was over later, and had her bit, she also needed more ten minutes after shot one. Given my circumstances I did not get teh usual 'How much did you have, you look ripped' etc etc. Sad that it takes death to indice politeness.1.50
2011-08-100.30000 grams$37.5Can one hate onself for doing something that one does voluntarily? I guess so, see the criminally compelled. Anyway, I ponder this as I sit in the abandoned potholed end of a Mt Gravatt East carpark, and select a point to jab. I should be suffering, stoically, like my dad. That is the only way to work through this maelstrom of grief. But the refuge of teh needle beckons too easily.23.17
2011-08-100.30000 grams$37.5I should be at dad's cooking dinner, but I am at S', cooking gear. My brekky shot scoffled a halfday early. How will I hold tomorrow's shot for a night?1.33
2011-08-130.04000 grams$0So, on way back from airport dropping sis off, I decide to score, easy with that boy in my flat. I do, and he gives a takeaway. Gear is removing any ability to feel anything. Tomorrow that will return.63.25
2011-08-130.04000 grams$0The takeaway shot. In the nathroom back at dad's. Dad's, not pares. Change your sentence structure. At dad's all day, stoned but trying to study, an assignment due thi sweek. Focus.0.58
2011-08-130.12000 grams$13.6Third shot for teh day. Give S extra, have to do her she has experienced this acid burnout like dq has. Maybe I have it too but just cannot feel anything?5.92
2011-08-170.30000 grams$75First after two days off. V stoned. Falling asleep. Lovely crash at S's afterwards, just peaceful. This is what gear is good for, after grief, during grief, not to be overused, but to remind us that grief is not all and everything - it can be attenuated eventually.94.50
2011-08-200.33000 grams$65so tonight i will stay at S', second night away from dad'd since mum died. saw dr T this morn for metro script, grief still nasty, find myself crying whwn i get a moment to think.73.00
2011-08-200.15000 grams$0Moan kept this rock from this arvy. And I got pins n needles from this arvy, so perhaps lucky this happened. She still has trouble, popped her earlier shot.4.67
2011-08-310.20000 grams$12.5Shopped for W, who got a full thingy. SO S didn't have to spend much pay which was good261.67
2011-08-310.22000 grams$0So this was the second bit out of the 25 bag we bought...tax out of a weight plus $25 cash. The first shot didn't do much (.18g shared between 2). This one pushed us over teh edge, we were stoned.1.00
2011-09-020.30000 grams$75The boys at MG got visited yesterday, but only a random visit, looking for a former resident, the troublesome gal from hell. Young gal with bad boyrfriend syndrome. So they were off yesterday, giving us a break, and on today.46.83
2011-09-030.08000 grams$30A brekky shot for my exam. Thanks S for forgoing her own to let me have this leftover from yesterday's shop. Enough to cruise me through the exam at 1130am13.50
2011-09-030.37500 grams$75Did fine in exam I think. No worries re passing I believe, unless I am greatly mistaken. Still not at that point where we can shoot only on pay days, to meet the 'don't run for boy' minimum criteria I set.6.58
2011-09-040.28000 grams$62.5So, B suggested we try a new source, which was a good idea given teh current poor state of Bris gear. Either the dealer is off, or their gear is shite. So got 125 of this new stuff, mixed up cloudy, did little.20.58
2011-09-050.22000 grams$55Snaffled ten bucks tick. Not as bad as I expected, given the overall low quality of Bris gear at present.31.33
2011-09-090.30000 grams$75So a big shot, a big spend, as I tell myself it will be teh only one I can afford, what with Sim needing to buy a friend's painting (this is a good thing I know) and repaying a shot a friend loaned me a few days back. SO a biggie. But don't get smashed.95.92
2011-09-100.20000 grams$50Ah well, last cash save $5, and the petrol man wouldn't give Sim more than 50 cash out even when buying petrol. So 2 of my last five goes on an ATM fee, as the dealer is on his way and we haven't time to look for CBA atms. So the cycle of poverty for the urban junkie goes.19.50
2011-09-110.01000 grams$50Cut stuff, pure stuff, stuff that burns your arm on the way in, stuff that burns your soul on the comedown...stuff. 22.75
2011-09-110.15000 grams$25Given to 'test', cut and different.1.25
2011-09-120.06600 grams$30Boy stayed at my place last night...spent ten minutes waking him up, then are told he's out except for a fifty...ah well. Cutting down is good.18.00
2011-09-140.22000 grams$60Turned out to be decent, could have just gotten a century. Is it possible that we are both becoming poorer? Payday for S, we don't go to Liddiard to save beans to score tomorrow, and still we only have 70...I return the ten given for tomorrow's lunch money. And we'll have to ask for 20 tick, knocked back last time...58.92
2011-09-180.20000 grams$55So waited for Richy to turn on for a few hours. Nothing by 1215. Nicely, B said she's intro without shopping for self. Nice. I pick her up (come alone she says), drive her to Holland Park, we score a few minutes after arrival, drive her back, I sweat and shiver with the packet in my hand, drop her off, drive to S', we mix n shoot. A taste, and little else I think. But S happy, she gets some sleep. Paid B a huge ten bucks for the intro. Guess I intro'd her to Mt Grav so even stevens?91.08
2011-09-190.22000 grams$12.5Nice stuff. No upfront, but legs all the way to the ground! Dad goes to dinner at the Eversons, which is nice of them. First neighbours to ask him over that he accepted.28.58
2011-09-190.22000 grams$12.5Second bit of our rock - fifty cash plus tax. Nice. Reminds me a little of the bad old days. Cried at work a couple of times. V tired from episode at Redcliffe A&E last night. Such a life.1.42
2011-09-200.13000 grams$0Last of prior night's shop n tax. W got 600, we put in 50, got 3 shots out. Noice.10.42
2011-09-210.30000 grams$75Rich off, tried Rosie, he hung up on me saying he'd ring back, forty later he rings to say he's on way back from Coast, but not which one.36.92
2011-09-220.20000 grams$4020 tick. Big whoop. had a short chat to a well dressed R, spilling his concerns and troubles. Bus from Uni, then drive to MG.23.50
2011-09-240.20000 grams$50The curse of Sat morn scoring. S had checked that R would be on 'sometime today', so we killed a little time with Banana Bread at Lady Marmalade. Nice surrounds, nice staff, nice furnishings. Finally, we break, I text new guy R, then MG R texts us, and I have to ditch new guy R. Oops.41.50
2011-09-250.30000 grams$75Paid for by W - thanks again W. No scoring all day, but find out around two in the arvo that we would be getting on that night. Saw BP, as Mt Grav off all day. First time in while to see him, and it was nice.33.92
2011-09-260.24000 grams$60Good gear.had trouble driving back from mt grav,yet last nifty, had 150, and still I could drive back without a hitch. But tonight? Death stalked me in the next lane. Good gear, again.23.00
2011-09-260.24000 grams$60Good gear.had trouble driving back from mt grav,yet last nifty, had 150, and still I could drive back without a hitch. But tonight? Death stalked me in the next lane. Good gear, again.0.00
2011-09-270.30000 grams$50Borrowed from W - thanks W. Got an hour's time, once nice big rocky thing. S has spewed teh last two nights - once from Mt Grav, once from BP. Who knows. W says this ain't so hot, yet his mate P says it is.21.08
2011-09-300.25000 grams$60Friday, payday, not much to say. 72.42
2011-10-010.22000 grams$60S organises an early Sat morn score teh day b4. Quite the efficient lass when one wants gear. Boy is a bit late, S is in freak mode, part A when he arrives. But all good, she gets stoned and gets train.16.92
2011-10-020.06600 grams$60a friend does a big drive and asks me first if i wanted some. naively i agreed thinking he acted purely from niceness. Time reveals perhaps he wanted someone to share in the fuel costs. Which is fine, just not something made clear. Which always unbalances me.35.50
2011-10-040.20000 grams$50Tick. S asks, I am prepared to miss. S texts boys, asks and tells em I have no balls. This causes dissonance at their end, and they comment to me. Ends up I go home alone, of my choice. S upset. 46.33
2011-10-050.30000 grams$75Big day. Oil light comes on whilst driving Miss S to her work. I leave it at a Paddo garage to get oil and filter change. Walk to Auch station, $3.90 trainfare to TWG, one station.Then W txts at lunch, arrange him to pick me up after work, he goes to Sherwood Rd Sherwood instead. Late to Mt G...20.08
2011-10-070.33000 grams$25Shopping with W, payday, the stars are in alignment. Life shouldn't have to be this hard for people addicted to a substance. Take it away, we get sick, we go crazy. Supply it, we work, we produce, we contribute. But we have to give every cent we earn to the blackmarket to buy (never enough) the stuff to go to work the next day. Over a long time this lifestyle will turn the most wholesome, the most honest, the best of our nation into criminal machines for turning crime into cash. Legalise.47.92
2011-10-070.20000 grams$50Tickety tock, asked for by S. Not a good pattern to get into, two ticks this week already. This is how we move to daily use.0.58
2011-10-080.20000 grams$50Last cash. But small victories, we spent a century last night on groceries, a rarity for us. And we kept a little for petrol to drive to Mt Tambourine tomorrow.19.25
2011-10-090.06600 grams$60Big one indeed. Returned by lad, from the boy. These long drives I am not a fan of, he will kill his car or his self, all on a gabo mission. I guess we all will, when viewed through the lens of time.34.33
2011-10-110.20000 grams$50Tick gotten taht I should not have asked for. But I passed my CSSE1000 prac exam, and i am conditioned only to celebrate with opiates. So I ask and was granted tick. We always repay, at least with this guy.42.83
2011-10-120.30000 grams$75Stopped S' rent, she spat but I stood ground. We had to repay boy and this lad, so we were committed to 220 spend before we started. Plus this spend and we could not do it all. So I told her I had no choice.22.92
2011-10-130.20000 grams$50So Woollies were off as I finished Uni (earlier than usual due to prac exams in our CS labs). So I arrange my first meet with B's friend, R. Last meet I stuffed hima round and I thought he may cut me off, but no.21.33
2011-10-140.30000 grams$75A bigger shot. Falling asleep on drive back, S clapping to keep me awake. Not a mode of life conducive to grandfatherhood.26.83
2011-10-150.30000 grams$75Now RWoollies were meant to be on "10 to 10:30". I never believed in it happening, so I tried a couple of times then moved on to new HP boy at 11, and he's quick to meet. Off to hiphop fest he goes for the arvo. Not a bad lad.17.58
2011-10-170.06600 grams$60friend d drives back from long trip south,first of two shots. knocked me on my ass54.25
2011-10-170.04400 grams$40rest of boy's stuff1.42
2011-10-190.30000 grams$75Heavy heavy traffic. So instead of passing compuworld and grabbing some RAM for PA, we go Western Freeway and a long detour. Get smashed, yes, but for $75 one would expect to. Funny how usage creeps up. Must plot it on a Flash graph sometime to see how we have used...47.08
2011-10-200.22000 grams$60A bit of tickety tock. Trying to formulate a plan not to get two bits of tick at aonce - we owe boy 150, and then today got another 60 tick, Tomorrow I pay S' electricity bill, 255, plus boy 150, plus this 60, plus Pete's 50,,,,pay gone b4 we shoot it.22.58
2011-10-220.15000 grams$35Leftovers from Friday night shop with dq and us...keeps me up all night thinking on it, I eat at 4am eventually, as teh sun starts to awake...pathetic.35.42
2011-10-220.22000 grams$90Pay back sixty tick from Thursday, I think. Run outta the office furniture move to get metro and gear. An hour later A, my co-worker, borrows my car to do exactly the same thing.7.75
2011-10-220.20000 grams$50So teh last beans, third shot of the day. Leading into a heavy period of stoning that will take days to emerge from.4.58
2011-10-230.25000 grams$50Shopping for the W. Were planning to make some notes but turned out to be just gear. Using heavily.29.08
2011-10-240.05000 grams$60out to gailes after work, for the return of the long driver. bad juju. I left sharps on dave's desk, a training adobe book also, and my BCC library card...and i was meant to be heading to dad's for dinner.19.92
2011-10-240.22000 grams$0Already stoned but in that subtle pharmo way, so we get more. And we both push ourselves way too close to the edge. On my way to dad's I am having a, a what...a hysteria attack? I don't know how I am driving, Ikeep expecting to crash into something, just because it would make things worse and that's the way of things.1.17
2011-10-280.30000 grams$75Friday, payday, smash day. too much gear, a project due tomorrow, I approach oblivion.94.83
2011-10-280.18000 grams$37.5pre gig shot, top ups for the drones.2.83
2011-10-290.24000 grams$62.5Intro for d to r, at hp. How coded I have become, perhaps my Uni studies. But just as I intro, he seems to be crashing and burning, perpetually giving up gear for a couple of days. Moving house, getting off gear, unable to break a half,whatever, it's all the black spot for a dealer, I know. 16.75
2011-10-300.20000 grams$50S' choice. R at HP is down and out, won't split a half (at first), so S says 'stuff him' and we go to Mt Grav. I understand the logic, when u have 2 competing dealers, it is obliged that u play them off against each other. The usual law of the jungle is not enuff dealers, and the only one avail giving u shite.24.50
2011-10-310.06600 grams$50friend d drove down yesterday, back today at lunch. I awoke feeling quite bad, perhaps as a result of mt grav for first time in a while yesterday. S comes out of dentist, she tries to put it off to shop first, but they had none of that.28.83
2011-11-010.24000 grams$30Halfway there, we get tickety tiock (which W repays for us the next day). No tock from Rosie, well we get the occasional 20 or 30 overnight, but it is too early days to ring up with no cash wanting a quarter weight. The benefit of relationships with your dealer. 23.00
2011-11-020.24000 grams$0Well, W is in town still, holidays or someuch, he wants a weight, I think we perhaps et too much of his. We paid back 60 tick we got yesterday. 'Same pretty face' says G when he asks S again or some tick the next day, that someone else owed. What does it mean? And S pissed at her job, as usual, underpaid in an underpaidindustry.24.17
2011-11-030.30000 grams$75funny - s said 'we'll be there in 20 minutes', I corrected, saying '15' , and she ordered a 150 shot! instead of the usual 120 shot. So she spent all her funds without a second thought, on my erroneous statement.24.33
2011-11-040.25000 grams$60B shops for me and I go to hers at lunch to get on....shots during teh day don't do a lot for me, often, and today was no exceptoion. More gear to come after work...19.42
2011-11-040.30000 grams$75Shopping for W, that's my excuse for scoring again. He gets a whole, I put in a century or so and get two more shots...4.25
2011-11-040.22000 grams$50About to go see COntagion at ElDorado Indro...The Sat morn shot is scoffled, surprise, surprise, habits eat stored gear...2.92
2011-11-050.30000 grams$50W leaves town, so I stretch my last century into a 150 shot, nice...out at BCC library Fairfield15.42
2011-11-060.06600 grams$60my frient dq is driving way too much for this Sunday night thing. Tonight he got a speeding ticket minutes after leaving home. Apparently he has accrued heaps of usable points so it is okay - all my youth this lad was always on teh edge of losing his licence, and with teh advent of computerised points systems, he lost his ability to trick and play the system.35.75
2011-11-070.20000 grams$50Asked for twenty bucks tick and was granted it..always surprised with a new dealer, but I shouldn't be, as when you spend $1000 per week with someone, you should be able to be short $20 here and there....17.58
2011-11-080.24000 grams$60tock, for KOL and BoH, two 'of' bands i'm seeing tonight! Out to Boondall for teh first time since I saw Bob Dylan and Patti Smith (I went for the support act that time also). I know I have a habit as I have to score before I will even think about going to a gig I have paid nearly $300 for already.24.25
2011-11-160.20000 grams$50First shot in three days, nice to have a it of time off, covered with maybe 30 extra metro and valiums.192.33
2011-11-180.22000 grams$50The usual payday thing. What to say. I shoulda bought the extra for S' buirthday in the morn, but I didn't.47.67
2011-11-180.20000 grams$37.5I get a brekky shot for S, she comes home (is she drunk? Does this worry me anymore? Why did it ever, her having an occasional drink?) and demands she have some of it now. By some, she means just under half....3.17
2011-11-190.17000 grams$37.5S's birthday, I buy a 150 with all the cash I have left in the world the previous night, S knows this and so scoffles half of it upon her return from carousing with Sanders...I should note, for the non-junkies out there, that this is normal behaviour, a lot of junkies cannot resist gear in their presence for a moment. I guess these types never become dealers.9.75
2011-11-200.33000 grams$0So W is back after a fortnight away. Only a day or two ago I realised we were especially broke, due to his absence! Turns out that a couple of decent shots each fortnight was the difference between us eating, and us doing the (take valiums instead of eating' limbo).I org R to stay around late in return for 'a carton to a carton and a half'. When W rocks up he only wants 88% of a carton - what does R say 'What happened to the carton'38.83
2011-11-210.20000 grams$50Ah, old mate in a bad mood two days running. Am glad I am of an age where I can realise that someone being a twat towards me, does not necessarily reflect upon my actions. The lad muffed opening the car door, then dropped a packet down my handbrake, I am guessing that is what put him in a foul mood. 'Don't ring me about 20 bucks...I'm not going out again for 20 bucks' he whipped in response to my explanation as to why I handed him 80...19.67
2011-11-230.28000 grams$0Good timing. S' payday, W wants a full, we finally pay R part of the 140 he's been chasing for a fortnight. We manage to do all the above, and get nicely toasted. I ditch the dinner with dad as I thought we'd be spending a century and getting v toasted, instead we just have a little more n usual. Cooked chicken risotto, yums. Well, last night I made it..48.58
2011-11-240.25000 grams$25So, luckily W txts to S, as my cell (as the seppos say) is left at S'...and scores two days in a row. This enables us to get a regular, even over-sized, shot for the one-time-only low low price of fifty bucks!23.92
2011-11-250.30000 grams$37.5Shopping with W , a little saved, a little too much eaten...24.92
2011-11-260.20000 grams$50I'm meant to be at the docs, getting my monthly scrip. Instead, she's running late, so I tell her I'll be back and go to Boondall to get my PC back after six months of storage over that disastrous RAID data loss. I get it, then decide to score b4 returning. Eventually rock back up, she won't take time to biopsy my suppurating leg, but hey, for once she waited for me, instead of teh last forty times I waited for my croaking doc...17.08
2011-11-270.14000 grams$35Confused, drunk, and speaking in mumbles, we manage to wheedle a non-100 pack from mr 100. Stuffaround at the meeting place, we wait, and wait, then it is changed, then he's not there..punishment for buying non-standard sizes?27.42
2011-11-270.05500 grams$60Part A of a two parter. Thanks for teh long drive, sorry it wears your car out. And sorry about those nasty bruises on your inner arms...4.42
2011-11-280.05500 grams$40The second, smaller, part of a 2 bag, retruend on a long drive. As ever, I could not sleep at all, knowing thi swas in my possession, So S wised up to my scam and demanded teh gear at 5am. Spent a workday in a daze, but work is quiet atm.10.00
2011-11-300.30000 grams$75Aaah, stress. Schnarbs turn up about 30 seconds to watch our lad arrive. Obviously 'acting on info', these plods could not act as he smartly stayed in a public spot with a good hundred metres between them and him. Anyway, 'nuff said. Just this: I am sure that once it was the police's duty to help citizens? To prevent harm from coming to them? Now, they enforce political policy and ignore the harm being dealt out to individuals, unless it coincides with said policies.60.50
2011-12-010.17000 grams$40Nice. A friend, dq, lent me the shortfall to go shopping. Much driving, lots of traffic, out to teh west dropping said friend back, then to dad's, Shoppingtown (what a name) to look for nephew pressies.24.25
2011-12-040.06600 grams$60Back from down south, 600ks in 24 hours. A $200 speeding ticket, 3 points, but the cop was decent enough, he dropped it from 121km/h to 120km/h, which took it from $330 down to $200...do I thank the cop for his generosity?75.75
2011-12-080.20000 grams$50Crud. Powdered crud. Complained, politely, rcvd an effusive response, which makes me more suspicious 'oh, yeah, i'm seeing a runner, it's just easier to break up this way, i spoke to his Man, he told me he's looking after me, it's not cut, I'm buying too much...'. Basically, too much talk. The gear's shite. Would've seen Mt Grav today if they'd been around.92.17
Total dollars spent on gear, (including what I covered for friends and demons) - $132002.91 back