jeweled stars in my sink,
are the sum of my achievements in this ballet,
their stringed potential in simple chemical status
beats my over planned toughness
Southern friends spur me on to publicise my private humiliations.
I cannot discern if this would be a good or bad act.
I hope this means I am moving towards something, some absence-of-point that indicates I have reached a maturity that allows me to stop ascribing positives and negatives to every act I may perform. To cease assessing, cease judging, to flow regardless of direction and motivation.
Perhaps I am where I do not have to care.
And is this a loss or an achievement.
Is that not part of the result?
****
Just a day without gear and the Knives! So sharp! So Quickly!
Could you say you had all knowledge if you rearranged every letter in your head in to every permutation.
E.g.
Sun is hot
Sut is hon
Sus in toh
Etc etc. You would know that sun is hot I guess, but that fragment of knowledge would be lost amongst a pile of garbled nonsense.
So perhaps knowledge is the deletion of nonsense, leaving truth. I remember Linus of Peanuts fame, once commenting that it would take him years in school to unlearn all he had learnt from Lucy.
A lifelong quest.
"A job that slowly kills you", as Thom Yorke (my current inamorata) would warble.
Speaking of warbling, only a couple of days till I go to All Tomorrows Parties, and see Spiritualized (ex Spacemen 3! - I played them in a fill-in shift on Zed a fortnight back - they did that Revolution song that I believe Mudhoney eventually covered, and spoofed a line about "a long uphill walk to the methadone clinic") plus Nick Cave doing Dig Lazarus Dig - I haven't seen him play since 2004, in Love Letter Days - perhaps Thursday night will be noisier. Oh, and The Saints will be playing their entire Stranded album for the first time ever - I know of them but have never been a big fan - I respect them and their place in the music scene, but came in too late, just seeing the ridiculed end as members played solo to more pity than 'plause.
It will be a little strange to leave work and go to a gig all before dark - who puts concerts on on Thursdays? Part of the whole corporatisation of rock I guess, although that really happened fifteen years ago at least, so I should not be surprised.